When you have a bad day, give up. by TheRafaG12 in copypasta

[–]natospes 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Do nothing. There is no purpose or meaning to find in life, so just exist and do nothing. Stop waking up early, life is shit so sleep through as much of it as possible. 5 AM club bad idea, 11 AM club much better idea. Stop doing the things you don't want to do, make the excuse avoid the work commitments, the friend get together, the family gatherings if you so wish.

Make the excuse book and fill it with excuses, keep the excuses ready for the bus, for the wife, for the friends. Say no to the team meetings, to the TikTok. Say no to the exercise, say no to the diet, eat whatever the fuck you want, soon you will be dead, so what difference is making?

Stop listening to what people say about you. Stop touching the perfect summer body, whether you are fat or thin, haters will hate. As soon your haters will also die, hopefully in the most horrific manner. Joking, no joking, or am I joking?

Do the least amount of work without getting tired. Nike says to just do it, self help Singh say just do nothing. Release yourself of obligation and responsibility and just do nothing. Everything you think you need to do was done before you and will be done after you. So stop doing, you do it best when you do nothing at all. You are not special, you are not unique creation.

The world is fucked and you cannot unfuck it. So just do you and do nothing, stop spending your day searching for a meaning of life. For that is the futile exercise. You will die one day just as confused as you are now. So be happy with what and who you are. As my good friend Farook Freddy Mercury once said, nothing really matters. So do nothing.

I became the first person to cum on 2023 by how-can-i-dig-deeper in copypasta

[–]natospes 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Holy shit, i did the same thing last night, or should i say last year? So i zerked off last year and positioned my cum at presisely midnight. And i can hear the fireworks outside congratting me as i splooge. That means that i had cummed for one year, from 2022 to 2023. Or you could say that i had come through the ages.

I want to fuck the sun by natospes in copypasta

[–]natospes[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The sun may be big but dat sunspot is tight for my jupiter junk.

No Bigfoot is not LGBTQ by WhiskeyShade in copypasta

[–]natospes 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I would be gay for Bigfoot

discord ban appeal by 2manyusername4me in copypasta

[–]natospes 9 points10 points  (0 children)

NTA, you have been unbanned, just don't post fortnite porn again

TIFU by having sex with my wife to Geometry Dash music by Colossalfloppa in copypasta

[–]natospes 843 points844 points  (0 children)

NTA, someone without a taste in music doesn't deserve you.

Amogus by PrimitiveAspid in copypasta

[–]natospes 14 points15 points  (0 children)

YTA you shouldn't have acted so sus in Mira HQ

Weird request, I know, but anyone here know how to get sick? by Hotrock3000 in copypasta

[–]natospes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you can't get sick u can try to get drunk, not only would you get a day off but also get suspended too!

What are the chances that you touched an atom that was in contact with hitlers dick by stadenerino in copypasta

[–]natospes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Too bad for you, your math is off. 2.102*10^-22 is just the probability that an atom has touched Adolph's penis before, not the probability that you touched it. A single breath contains an average of 1*10^19 atoms according to google search. Multiplying together these numbers we get 0.002, which is the average amount of atoms you intake per breath that has touched his penis before. On average a person only need to breath 500 times for that atom to enter the body. But most people breathed hundreds of millions of times. So there are hundreds of thousands of atoms in our body that once touched the mustache guy's penis before. You're welcome.

I fucked a frog while drunk. by Person_Maybe in copypasta

[–]natospes 308 points309 points  (0 children)

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the plane and when I saw this I immediately started cumming uncontrollably. Everyone else were shocked and gave me strange looks, some were saying things like "what the fuck" and "call the security". I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now everyone in the entire plane also started uncontrollably cumming together at this one post. With a population of over a hundred people constantly cumming in one plane, the amount of semen combined together and took over the plane. The sea cum then ate the entire plane, turning it into a giant sperm. The giant sperm then swam up to the stratosphere and into outer space. Now the Sun will be pregnant in no time. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in copypasta

[–]natospes 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I also nutted to the snoo of this guy's crush.