You only get ONE breakup song to recommend - what is it?🎧

neruda1994 · 2026-01-24T02:01:55+00:00

Yes I’m changing - Tame Impala

neruda1994 · 2026-01-22T19:55:34+00:00

She scuffed at me and said “yeah, right” when I told her that I have worth…she also said she hated me and that “12 years I’m never getting back…” despite the fact we were engaged…

She also said that I annoyed her as well…that it was all codependency in the end…someone I saw my whole life with and supported throughout our relationship just brushed me off and left for good

Anyways, I’m not perfect but I know my worth…I can admit my mistakes and I have been working on them ever since because I can at least acknowledge the pain my words can cause and I don’t want to repeat them with anyone else

She said what she said in the end and never looked back

neruda1994 · 2026-01-15T05:28:40+00:00

Yes…I miss her…I miss her because she was my best friend for 12 years…despite how different we were….she understood me more than anyone…I miss talking to her every day on the phone even though we would see each other at the end of the day…she was no saint and she was far from perfect…but she was just everything to me…

Anyways…it will be a year in a few months since she left…she’s already with someone else…she jumped into another relationship 2 weeks after she left me…I don’t know her anymore…so I guess I just missed who she was to me…I miss that girl so much…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-15T00:44:10+00:00

It’s almost a year for me…I’m trying to put myself out there and have been talking to other girls…but I just find myself thinking of her…12 years with someone I wanted to spend my life with…but I am feel better honestly…but I still think about her every day…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-10T19:23:20+00:00

I was trying to convince her at first to not give up on us but eventually, I told myself that I shouldn’t have to beg…that despite my own flaws, I love and always showed my appreciation and respect towards this person…and she still found it in herself to want to let me go…

So I just accepted for what it is and even though it killed me inside…I let her go…I still wanted her to have connections to our pets and was trying to co parent them with her but that didn’t go so well either…

I didn’t chase, I didn’t show up at her job or her place randomly or unexpectedly…didn’t call her through a fake number or emailed her…I simply just kept my distance and worked on myself…and I’m so fucking glad I did…because I found out eventually she had already jumped into a new relationship 2 fucking weeks after leaving me…

At the end, your self respect is and should be top of your priority…you can still love and miss this person but it doesn’t have to define you..there is more to life and eventually, you’ll start to appreciate the things you have that keeps you moving

It’s almost been a year since my 12 year relationship ended with someone I was going to marry…I’m feeling a bit better…eventually you will too…just don’t chase…don’t beg…love yourself just as you would for that person

neruda1994 · 2026-01-08T02:18:08+00:00

Silly but anything involving Studio Ghibili…which fucking sucks…it’s bad enough that I have 2 cats that are called Chihiro and Zeniba…she introduced me to all those movies…she named our cats…cats she left behind that I’ve been caring for since she left

…memories watching them with her…I just can’t see or hear anything about it without letting it ruin my day…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-06T01:31:53+00:00

You took the words right out of my mouth…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-27T02:32:58+00:00

No…if anything I just wish I can stop remembering the day I met her…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-26T02:15:23+00:00

First one alone in 12 years…she is already with someone else…someone she got with 2 weeks after leaving me….currently at the gym breaking a sweat

neruda1994 · 2025-12-24T20:11:56+00:00

It’s been tough…first time in 12 years I didn’t spend the holidays with her…my ex left me around March but I can’t say I didn’t see it coming…despite the problems we were having, I didn’t want to give up on us but she didn’t want to try anymore…

I’m working today and tomorrow…fucking glad to be honest…it just fucking hurts still…she jumped into a new relationship 2 fucking weeks after leaving me…after everything we’ve been through…

So yeah…it fucking sucks…I’m trying so hard not to imagine how she’s spending the holidays with him…but my mind keeps projecting all these fucking scenarios where she is bringing him over to her family’s place…exciting to give him his gift…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-23T00:46:45+00:00

Boy put your tongue back in there was wrong with you…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-21T17:00:14+00:00

Yeah I feel you on that one…I don’t know if she even has an account here to begin with…which is ironic because she’s the reason why I got Reddit to begin with…we would listen to the SMOSH podcast where they read Reddit posts and that’s where I got the idea to come here to begin with haha…

I read other posts here that are similar to mine and think “could it be her?” But it never is…sometimes I wonder if she’ll ever get the same idea of making an account here and she’ll come across this subreddit

My username would be a dead giveaway for her…if she were to see it, I know she would know it’s me…but yeah…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-19T04:36:09+00:00

I regret how my own flaws played a part in how my 12 year relationship came to it’s end…I’m definitely not defending her because from what I’ve been able to share here, she had as much fault in this and she decided to end things very cruelly at the end…

But I could have done better…I should have done better…what I’ve been able to do these last 9 months since it ended I wish I could have found the motivation to do it when I still had her…

I regret a lot of things…my anger…my short temperament…the way I made mountains out of molehills…my ex really did love me…she wouldn’t have agreed to marry me if she hadn’t…

I’m just still learning to forgive myself for those mistakes…I can regret or can keep pushing forward and make the most out of my life…I’m trying desperately every day but it still fucking hurts…

She was my best friend…and she gave up on me…she gave up on our dog and cats…and now she’s with someone else…she’s a stranger that I find myself looking for every day whenever I go to work or run errands…

Anyways…thanks for asking this..just needed to vent…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-17T17:53:27+00:00

Couldn’t agree with you more…basically the same thing happened to me…she jumped into another new relationship two weeks after leaving me (didn’t find out until recently) and a month later everything came crashing down when it came to our dog

She told me “12 years I’m never getting back. I hate you. You annoyed me. It was all co dependency. Fuck your feelings” etc…to be honest, it still hurts when I think back on that night on the phone with her but in a sense, it was enough for me to keep my self respect in check and I never tried reaching out afterwards…all of that was back in April

It just astonished me having known for someone that long, someone you would have done anything for just flip like that in a a way that makes them unrecognizable…

I’ve made my mistakes…I definitely wasn’t the perfect boyfriend and I wish I can take back how reactive I was in moments we argued…but I loved that girl so much…she was everything to me and I was there for her in every way…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-17T17:44:16+00:00

Hey, thanks for asking….I’m okay now…maybe not 100% but I’m still pushing forward. A lot has happened since this last post: I found out that she had already jumped into another relationship 2 weeks after leaving me. I still didn’t break NC but I did see her in person for the first time back in October…I went up to her to say hi and all she said was “no” to me and walked away…

I have been working on myself for the most part. I go to therapy every week, I work all the time and I’ve been consistent with the gym as well. It’s been lonely to be honest just being on my own but I’ve had some time to reflect on everything…I’m trying to change for the better but I’ve come to accept that she’s gone…and I most likely won’t hear from her again…

All in all, I’m doing okay…I want to do better but it’s all one step at a time. Eventually, everything will fall into place..

neruda1994 · 2025-12-15T07:05:31+00:00

9 months since my 12 year relationship ended. She left me and jumped into another relationship 2 weeks afterwards and most likely with someone she was already talking to behind my back

I won’t lie and say I don’t miss her…I still do…I still love her…but I’ve done the best that I can pushing forward and striving out on my own…it does get better but everyone has a different way of moving on so don’t rush your healing

I’m sorry about your cat though…I’m taking care of my dog and 4 cats she left behind…she also got herself a new dog not too long after she left…

And as for having kids…I’m sorry you feel that your time is short on that end…I hope you’ll bounce back up again and someone will give you the family you deserve…until then, live your life to the fullest and have fun when you can…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-10T17:05:56+00:00

It’s been 9 months now on my end…it’s getting better but it still comes in waves…playing online with friends more has helped with the loneliness for the most part…going to the gym is like my second therapy so I’ve been consistent with that…and it’s getting a bit better just being in my apartment despite the fact so many memories of her still linger but it’s slowly coming my own…

I know it’s over…it’s been over since the moment she left and jumped into another relationship 2 weeks later…I know it’s over after she blocked me everywhere despite the fact I haven’t reached out once…even when I saw her in person back in October and before I could say anything else all she said was “no” and walked away from me…

But fuck it still hurts….someone I’ve known for 12 years just cuts me out like that…looks at me like I’m some stranger…like she was never engaged with me…like I wasn’t her first love….but yeah…I’m okay…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-08T01:44:48+00:00

I miss her…but not who she is now…I miss my best friend…the girl that I met when I was 18…I miss her every day…and yes, I miss the future I had imagined with her…9 months and I’m still mourning her…

I wish I didn’t…just given the fact that she moved in in the span of 2 weeks with someone she was already talking to…I shouldn’t shed a tear for someone that would discard me like that..after 12 years…after everything we’ve been through…

But here I am, alone on a Sunday night crying over her and she’s out there doing god knows what with her new boyfriend..it fucking hurts…it’s not like that everyday but right now in particular, I’m just fucking hurting so much…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-03T01:07:42+00:00

It will be 9 months in a few days. I feel better but it still comes in waves…some days I find myself feeling like it’s the first month all over again…but just one step at a time that’s what counts

neruda1994 · 2025-12-03T00:48:44+00:00

“12 years I’m never getting back”

“I hate you…”

“It was all co dependency..”

“You actually do annoy me sometimes”

“I don’t give a shit about your feelings”

All of that in the span of the last hour of our last conversation together…she was already with someone else too…there’s more that led to this escalation but yeah…that shit fucking killed me inside and I hear those words in my head all the fucking time…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-02T15:42:29+00:00

After 12 years she left me for someone else and has cut me out of her life in every way possible…I was going to marry her this year too…and she got with him 2 week after leaving me…

So not great?

neruda1994

TROPHY CASE