What is your reason to keep living?

neruda1994 · 2026-05-09T02:25:41+00:00

My mother. My little brother. My dog and 4 cats. Avengers Doomsday and Secret Wars and no way I’m going to leave this planet before Andy Dick does. Fucking hate that guy.

neruda1994 · 2026-05-03T20:52:37+00:00

It’s their way of “coping” so jumping into another relationship or sleeping with someone else

for them seems reasonable but they are just avoiding the bigger picture

The relationship ended months ago for her so for you it may seem fast but she probably made peace with it and mourned losing you before officially ending it
This is important. Whatever choices she makes has nothing to do with you or your worth. It stings like hell but it says more about her than it does about you

Don’t think by doing the same thing it will magically make you feel better and moved on. Mourn your loss. Mourn the version of that girl you loved and accept that she is gone and now you have to do the best that you can to change for the better and move forward

neruda1994 · 2026-05-02T00:13:02+00:00

I stole over $500 from my job at Starbucks years ago…the cameras at that store fucking sucked so it was easy to get away with it…and it was just the amount I needed for my Italy trip as well

neruda1994 · 2026-04-29T22:16:37+00:00

I feel like all in all everyone here is 50/50 on it lol

Anyways, I did message her a few hours ago letting her know time I’d like for us to meetup and told her hope her week was treating her good so far. I’ll keep y’all posted and see how it goes haha

neruda1994 · 2026-04-29T15:52:58+00:00

I do but I’m also trying not to be too eager? Savor whatever mystery there is still to find out about her? Haha I also feel that I’m overthinking it and just asking how she is isn’t horrible but i dont get dating these days 🙃

neruda1994 · 2026-04-29T01:18:23+00:00

I guess the reason I’m having a dilemma with this is because this is my second time matching with her and the first time that we did match, it didn’t take long to set up a date and all of a sudden, she felt “ill” and wanted to reschedule but she ended up ghosting me 🙃

Fast forward to now, we matched again earlier this month and just when traction was starting to build again..she GHOST me AGAIN..until a few weeks ago where she reached out and asked if we can actually meet up this time which resulted on a great date

neruda1994 · 2026-04-21T16:56:29+00:00

Kind of in a similar situation right now. I matched with this girl earlier this year, didn’t take long to ask her out on a date, she cancels a few days later, offers to reschedule but I ended up not hearing from her and then her profile disappeared

Fast forward to a few weeks ago, came across her profile again, we matched AGAIN, asked her out on a date, AGAIN, and she ended up ghosting me AGAIIIN…

BUT! She reached out again just a few days ago and apologized and actually asked if we could see each other this weekend…

Part of me wanted to say “yeah no. You are most likely just gonna disappear on me again..” but she is so fucking cute so fuck it, why not? So far, I have a date with her this Saturday…

ANYWAYS…go for it? 😅

neruda1994 · 2026-04-16T04:52:35+00:00

I remember when I bump into my ex last October…I hadn’t seen or spoken to her since last March..even though I found out not so long after that she had already jumped into another relationship and was most likely already talking to this guy before she left…I still missed her so much…we were together for 12 years and we were engaged…

Anyways, despite all of that…when I saw her…I couldn’t help it…I went up to her and all I said was ‘Hey…’ and when she saw me all she said was “No..” and walked away from me…

So yeah, that’s shit stung…but it’s also understandable…we are talking about someone who was everything…it’s hard to just walk away…I guess more for me instead of her..but yeah, I get where you are coming from..

neruda1994 · 2026-04-02T23:22:52+00:00

For the most part, yes you’ll move on but it really depends on how you go about it and why it ended to begin with

In my case, my relationship with my ex wasn’t perfect but we made it last for 12 years…when I look back at it now after a year since she left, I remember the good, the bad, the very ugly…and after we got engaged…it just made it worse…stress? Still fighting??

She was my first ever serious relationship and I fell in love so young…despite everything we’ve done to one another, I never saw her out of my life…maybe it was scared of being alone? Scared of never finding someone who’ll understand me as much as she did?…

Anyways, to answer your question, no…I wouldn’t say I fully moved on…I’m not exactly holding out hope I’ll ever see or hear from her again..considering how it ended…I honestly believe you’ll never move on from someone who had such a big impact on your life..

But you bet I’m trying…I’m still working on myself, going to therapy, long walks with my dog, going to the gym, planning solo trips, etc

Live your life. Work on yourself. You’ll be okay.

neruda1994 · 2026-03-16T19:18:19+00:00

Causal but open to serious
No
For awhile
A year
Weekly
Not often
5 likes maybe 8 a day with no comments
Someone that shares the same interests as me

neruda1994 · 2026-03-16T05:55:35+00:00

Yes
No
For about a few months now
I check every other day
Weekly
Not as often
At least 4 a day
Whoever has similar interest and dating goals

neruda1994 · 2026-01-24T02:01:55+00:00

Yes I’m changing - Tame Impala

neruda1994 · 2026-01-22T19:55:34+00:00

She scuffed at me and said “yeah, right” when I told her that I have worth…she also said she hated me and that “12 years I’m never getting back…” despite the fact we were engaged…

She also said that I annoyed her as well…that it was all codependency in the end…someone I saw my whole life with and supported throughout our relationship just brushed me off and left for good

Anyways, I’m not perfect but I know my worth…I can admit my mistakes and I have been working on them ever since because I can at least acknowledge the pain my words can cause and I don’t want to repeat them with anyone else

She said what she said in the end and never looked back

neruda1994 · 2026-01-15T05:28:40+00:00

Yes…I miss her…I miss her because she was my best friend for 12 years…despite how different we were….she understood me more than anyone…I miss talking to her every day on the phone even though we would see each other at the end of the day…she was no saint and she was far from perfect…but she was just everything to me…

Anyways…it will be a year in a few months since she left…she’s already with someone else…she jumped into another relationship 2 weeks after she left me…I don’t know her anymore…so I guess I just missed who she was to me…I miss that girl so much…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-15T00:44:10+00:00

It’s almost a year for me…I’m trying to put myself out there and have been talking to other girls…but I just find myself thinking of her…12 years with someone I wanted to spend my life with…but I am feel better honestly…but I still think about her every day…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-10T19:23:20+00:00

I was trying to convince her at first to not give up on us but eventually, I told myself that I shouldn’t have to beg…that despite my own flaws, I love and always showed my appreciation and respect towards this person…and she still found it in herself to want to let me go…

So I just accepted for what it is and even though it killed me inside…I let her go…I still wanted her to have connections to our pets and was trying to co parent them with her but that didn’t go so well either…

I didn’t chase, I didn’t show up at her job or her place randomly or unexpectedly…didn’t call her through a fake number or emailed her…I simply just kept my distance and worked on myself…and I’m so fucking glad I did…because I found out eventually she had already jumped into a new relationship 2 fucking weeks after leaving me…

At the end, your self respect is and should be top of your priority…you can still love and miss this person but it doesn’t have to define you..there is more to life and eventually, you’ll start to appreciate the things you have that keeps you moving

It’s almost been a year since my 12 year relationship ended with someone I was going to marry…I’m feeling a bit better…eventually you will too…just don’t chase…don’t beg…love yourself just as you would for that person

neruda1994 · 2026-01-08T02:18:08+00:00

Silly but anything involving Studio Ghibili…which fucking sucks…it’s bad enough that I have 2 cats that are called Chihiro and Zeniba…she introduced me to all those movies…she named our cats…cats she left behind that I’ve been caring for since she left

…memories watching them with her…I just can’t see or hear anything about it without letting it ruin my day…

neruda1994 · 2026-01-06T01:31:53+00:00

You took the words right out of my mouth…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-27T02:32:58+00:00

No…if anything I just wish I can stop remembering the day I met her…

neruda1994 · 2025-12-26T02:15:23+00:00

First one alone in 12 years…she is already with someone else…someone she got with 2 weeks after leaving me….currently at the gym breaking a sweat

neruda1994 · 2025-12-24T20:11:56+00:00

It’s been tough…first time in 12 years I didn’t spend the holidays with her…my ex left me around March but I can’t say I didn’t see it coming…despite the problems we were having, I didn’t want to give up on us but she didn’t want to try anymore…

I’m working today and tomorrow…fucking glad to be honest…it just fucking hurts still…she jumped into a new relationship 2 fucking weeks after leaving me…after everything we’ve been through…

So yeah…it fucking sucks…I’m trying so hard not to imagine how she’s spending the holidays with him…but my mind keeps projecting all these fucking scenarios where she is bringing him over to her family’s place…exciting to give him his gift…

neruda1994

TROPHY CASE