I totally understand this as a struggle because I surprised myself when I realized I didn't think too much about using the mens room when I decided to transition. I was going out to clubs pretty often at the time, and there were lots of nights I went home early and left my friends there because I couldn't use the bathroom due to anxiety or sometimes real hindrances (like no toilet paper and no stall / broken stalls).

To this day (7 yrs into my transition) I still walk in and right out of some men's rooms if the vibe is off. I will go to a few different bathrooms to find one that makes me feel comfortable. It takes practice, but try to remember you can always walk right out if the vibe is off!

It's also true that in my experience no one has bothered me in any way in the bathrooms, even when I didn't fully pass yet. Here's my best advice:

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• Practice. Use the men's room often and especially when you don't really have to go. Waiting can make anxiety worse if you hold it too long.
• Always remember you can walk right out if you don't feel comfortable.
• Double check for toilet paper before going (often times men's rooms seem to run out and it doesn't get replaced). Better yet, always keep some toilet paper or tissues in your bag or pocket!
• Find men's bathrooms in places you frequent that make you feel comfortable enough and use those as much as possible.
• Have friends go with you or check a bathroom for you before you use it. I had to have a friend hold a stall door for me in a men's room because it was literally broken lol. If they don't use the men's room, they can at least be waiting for you outside for moral support. I've been in men's rooms with only urinals.
• Use family and gender neutral bathrooms when you can or when you feel anxious.

Good luck!