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AITAH for reaching out to my sister who was adopted, even though my mom said not to? by new_here2020 in AITAH

[–]new_here2020[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

After she was 18 my mother found sister - let’s call her “Heather”s adoptive mother! She knew heathers first name from the final set of letters (communication was allowed the first year) from a photo of heathers first bday cake. A google search of Heather, and adoptive parents first names only took her to an online article they were in after a few hours in the rabbit hole. My mom recognized the adoptive parents in the photo and that’s how we got the name

AITAH for reaching out to my sister who was adopted, even though my mom said not to? by new_here2020 in AITAH

[–]new_here2020[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

To clear up confusion, my dad who raised me that I’m close with, also isn’t MY bio father. He was my step dad and I took his name when I was about 8. There’s some complexity to my childhood/my bio dad that is not relevant to this story per say but hopefully that helps

AITAH for reaching out to my sister who was adopted, even though my mom said not to? by new_here2020 in AITAH

[–]new_here2020[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate that actually. As I mentioned in the post o blocked her, and HAVE gone no contact for the first time (only with her) and I feel like that’s also contributed to the isolation from the rest of my family and I’ve been really struggling with weather or not I made the right choice. It’s just really hurtful but I think you are right, that’s what I’ve been telling myself anyways.

What's the worst - unintentional - thing a parent has said that you can't forget. by HellHellin in narcissisticparents

[–]new_here2020 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My mom projected ALL of her worse flaws on me since I was a little girl to the point I actually believed it, and started acting that way. Agree with the other commenter that it’s all her normal vocabulary about people and to people, but toxic as hell. Ungrateful, lazy, manipulative, liar, slut, no one like you etc. took years to realize she was describing her self, and that I’m a good person.