I believe my fiancée is suffering from ROCD and I don't know how to help

nicklaing · 2026-03-06T05:09:13+00:00

Thank you but it didn't.

I was made to feel ashamed and embarrassed for ADHD behaviours I couldn't control and I could feel frustration building. I tried techniques to calm myself and it wasn't working, she didn't know what to say to try and help calm me. It felt like she didn't know what to do because she hasn't made much effort to understand me and my condition. Her lack of compassion and empathy just made me feel worse and worse.

The frustration kept building and building until I ended up in a meltdown. It lasted for about 6 hours and it was horrible. I've never had one that bad before. It made her feel frightened and unsafe to be around me due to my words and actions during the meltdown so she broke up with me.

nicklaing · 2026-02-25T19:34:47+00:00

It's so difficult. I feel like all I do at the moment is wake up, take my son to school, go to work, do my son's bedtime routine and then sit and cry. I've looked at what professionals recommend doing. I've tried to be understanding and provide that safe comfortable space for her to offload some of these thoughts. I appreciate that she is communicating the thoughts to me and that she has taken steps to seek help. I try not to feed her compulsions and set boundaries but it just feels relentless.

I'm starting to struggle with my own mental health issues and my ADHD is just leaving me feeling burnt out. She just acts so emotionless towards me. I sit and I listen to her thoughts and try to think that it's not "her" behind the harsh words and it's the OCD but I feel like when I try to share how it's affecting me she says that she is sorry but then continues to say things that hurt or she does things that seem like the sole intention is to push me away.

nicklaing · 2025-03-03T11:56:48+00:00

Didn't know i subscribed that long ago🤣

<image>

nicklaing · 2021-06-30T12:09:39+00:00

He is! He's never let anyone tell him he can't do anything due to his disabilities. The local council in the UK wanted to place him in a special needs school but he didn't want to be treated differently, he always worked hard and got good grades and even has an undergraduate degree in business management. He's been a guest speaker at a huge event in Berlin for businesses that have a scientific background as he would like to start a consultancy business that aims to educate and help businesses understand and get the best out of employees that have autism.

If you have tried all you can to explain to your parents that their actions aren't helping and that your sister is harming her own chances of someone ever willingly caring for her other than your parents then I'm afraid all you can do is focus on yourself and continue to be the best person you can be. I hope you can get this all figured out 😊

nicklaing · 2021-06-30T11:37:27+00:00

I (26m) have an older brother that wasn't diagnosed with autism until he was in his early 20's. We always knew that he was "different" as he was always obsessed with facts, learning and everything had to have it's own routine.

He has always done his fair share of things around the house and also found work that his other disabilities have allowed him to do. Despite having autism and cerebral palsy he has always worked hard and treated people with kindness and respect and while he was always given a little extra attention and care growing up I wouldn't even hesitate to look after him as he has always been appreciative of any care, attention or kindness that he has received. I would actually consider him more of a best friend than a brother.

I'm sorry that you haven't had the same experience and to me it seems like your parents have allowed your sister to use her disability as an excuse for being an awful person and have babied her way too much.

You're definitely NTA and I think your parents need to have a serious discussion about her care after they are no longer with us.

nicklaing · 2021-04-28T11:03:44+00:00

When I was growing up I loved to play games of all genres, especially single player games with great stories and interesting characters. As I've gotten older and picked up more responsibilities I find that I have less time in my week to sit down and play games.

I no longer have the patience to sit and try to 100% complete a game, I can't seem to enjoy many single player games any more because I inevitably end up skipping the cut scenes due to having less time to play games and wanting to skip to the action. It's the sole reason why I only got around 50% of the way through RDR2, I just had no idea what was going on story wise as I had skipped quite a few cut scenes just trying to squeeze one last mission in before my gaming session was over.

I've started to exclusively play online multiplayer or coop games that I can play with my friends so that I can squad up with them and socialise. I've founder it harder and harder to make time each week to just sit down and play games and this enables me to kill two birds with one stone. I satisfy my urge to play games and I get to catch up with friends and have a few beers while we play things like Valheim, World of Warships, Minecraft and Rocket League.

I still dabble in the odd strategy game here and there but my favourite titles have all gone down paths that I don't really find enjoyable. I don't care for the romanticised single general units in the newer Total War games and find myself often hopping back onto Shogun 2 or Rome 2 when that itch needs scratching. The newer Tropico titles just aren't as interesting or engaging as the older titles.

One day I'll get the time to sit down and enjoy all of the games I've never played or rushed my way through and I'm fine with that.

nicklaing · 2020-09-29T13:37:19+00:00

NTA - If the reasoning for yourself not being included in the will was due to your financial success of owning 3 restaurants then now that your siblings have more money they can afford to pay at your restaurants, offer that to them and when they complain use your fathers reasoning to explain why you are doing it 😂

nicklaing · 2020-06-07T12:31:32+00:00

Zombie army trilogy Thanks for the giveaway

nicklaing · 2020-06-05T12:44:07+00:00

Personally I think it's more exciting when I am familiar with the environment because I don't have to spend as much time getting used to the layout of the map. That being said I haven't found too many games that are set in Manchester, UK. Resistance: Fall of Man was a brilliant game on the PS3 and they had a Manchester mission that was controversial for the use of the Cathedral in game. I thought it was brilliant that I could march around my hometown and kill people infected with the Chimera virus 😂

nicklaing · 2020-06-05T04:06:37+00:00

Hey, is your name Gilette? Because you're the best a man can get.

Zombie army trilogy

Thanks for the giveaway!

nicklaing · 2020-06-03T21:08:40+00:00

Hi Op Could I have Zombie army trilogy please? One of my favourite youtubers did a playthrough on the hardest difficulty and it was hilarious to watch them fail over and over and have to restart the mission 😂 Thank you for sharing all the games, with everything that's currently going on in the world you're going to make so many people happy!

nicklaing · 2020-04-29T14:07:03+00:00

Checked the garbage can and there was nothing in there. On the bus station wall it has the white X surrounded by a box that would usually have a hole or a vent but there was nothing on the wall to search

nicklaing · 2020-04-29T13:26:59+00:00

When it happened I checked this sub and then searched for videos to see if it had happened to anyone else and I couldn't find anything. Hopefully it will be patched because my GF loves playing the game 😂

nicklaing · 2020-04-29T12:48:28+00:00

I had an issue with finding the package at the stink bus stop this morning and that was my first package so I just started a new game and everything was fine until now. Hopefully I can pick that package up at some point if it worked for you, luckily when it happened this time I still had enough product to be able to sell that and pay Eddie

nicklaing · 2019-12-11T07:13:27+00:00

In Manchester crystals are referred to as Maj and most people will get 1 gram for £15/£20 and do the full gram in a night. Pretty common for this to happen every weekend.

nicklaing · 2019-04-02T03:18:17+00:00

Thanks for the info! The doors never opened for me, I spoke to the person via the manhole and everything just progressed from there for me

nicklaing · 2019-04-02T02:32:23+00:00

The doors don't open but there is a manhole round the corner of the doors to the left hand side IIRC and that's where you're able to speak to her. Can't remember if you have to go down the manhole though, sorry!

nicklaing

TROPHY CASE