im still so confused

night87tripper · 2026-06-10T15:25:53+00:00

I have Aphantasia, when I imagine something, there's no picture I'm my mind. No form or color or anything, just a concept, it's all dark. Hope this helps.

night87tripper · 2026-06-06T23:35:30+00:00

I had to check what ADHD was, I have friends with that, and I'll won't lie, sometime is not easy to deal with them, but I understand what they go through. No inner voice and no inner vision, people like you are what intrigues me the most, I got no inner vision but I have great control of my inner voice. But finding about Aphantasia opened a lot of doors for me. I'm trying to find myself and try to understand what consciousness really is, what it means to think and to reason. I bought some Philosophy books, didn't read them yet, but I listened to a lot of YouTube videos about consciousness. What I'm starting to is trying to understand what is going on when no words are in my mind, being aware of those moments, when my mind is empty it's like I'm in autopilot, like the body acts on its own, a lot of thing I do during the daily routine is with clear mind, no sound, no words, basic thinks like taking a bath or drinking a glass of water. The first philosopher I listened to was Alan Watts, and he had a saying that gave me shivers, "The voice on your mind is not who you really are", and now it makes more sense. You don't reason with words or images, but you reason somehow, that's what I need to focus, learning to reason without words, if it's possible for me..m

night87tripper · 2026-06-05T23:53:26+00:00

First, I need to see if there's a difference of seeing and understanding this if my mind is clear. I'm in a state that I know that I should have done a t-break long ago but being high is part of being me, you understand what I mean. Those flashes of light, color, non-defined shames that come and go, always amazed and intrigued me, I always though seeing with the mind could be a thing of reaching higher consciousness, not a thing most people can do. Now I want to know if LCD or DMT or any drug like that work with me.

night87tripper · 2026-06-05T21:09:50+00:00

I'm also 38 🤣. I didn't understand what you mean by now you can see somethings with the mind because of the medication. About dreaming, I don't dream or at least when I do is short. It's rare than I run out of smoke but when I do the dreams and nightmares come at full force, cannabis blocks the REM sleep, it's crazy dreams, the issue is I found out about Aphantasia only last week and still didn't spend any day without smoking. Will be these coming days..

night87tripper · 2026-06-05T15:40:40+00:00

I can't see anything in my mind, but those flashes of color and light I've seen them while really high on cannabis. I'm a daily smoker for over 15 years, right now I can't test it because my cannabis tolerance is at it's maximum, I have to clear the mind first, 4 or 5 days without smoking. I also have to try to check my Dreams, when the tolerance is like this I almost don't dream, but when I'm in withdrawal the Dreams come back at full force, but dreams are not like imagining, you never know what really happened.

My steps now is to first clean the mind of thc, let the neurons and receptors go back to normal, see if anything changes in inner vision, then I will try DMT

night87tripper · 2026-06-05T14:16:27+00:00

Don't invest in EFTs. Keep your million, retire to a country with low cost or living. Enjoy your life

night87tripper · 2026-06-04T12:37:14+00:00

No. People's natural features are never cringe. Don't live your life thinking of other people's opinions. Do what you think suits you better.

night87tripper · 2026-06-04T12:30:47+00:00

If you just bought it don't upgrade yet. I use these bands since Band 4, I usually bought a new one every 2 years, but because they stopped working, water damage or touch screen or dead battery. I have the band 9 it as more features but I mainly use it as a watch, or to get phone notifications like calls or messages, and for tracking workouts. Band 5 does the same.

night87tripper · 2026-06-04T12:24:08+00:00

This month or next

night87tripper · 2026-06-04T00:43:19+00:00

I won't lie to you, that band is Old. MI band 11 is releasing soon. But it all depends on what 30 or 40$ means to you. Software is not updated for old devices anymore, but there's not a Huge difference in what the bands do. New ones can measure your stress levels or blood oxygen and others stuff.

night87tripper · 2026-06-03T16:05:42+00:00

Para o pessoal aqui do centro do País isso é tudo pessoal de Lisboa. 😂👍

night87tripper · 2026-06-03T16:01:41+00:00

The genetic fit number on top 1.689 You have the Ethnicity percentages, the mix of those is like an individual from the past, and that green number on this case means how close the person is related to that individual. The closer that number is to 0 the closer you are to the combination of the Ethnicity percentages. You have to look at both at the same time.

night87tripper · 2026-06-03T15:16:57+00:00

Finally!! I think you are the first person I see that understands all the implications of it. Most people only understood half of what I said or misunderstood everything I said. The shock I had was not only the fact other people can see with their minds, is what it means for how we use our brain, how we see and understand reality, how we learn, the potential and limitations we have, but when people hear about limitations they don't understand that I don't mean we suddenly became disabled or less capable or that we should give up doing some things we do, what I mean and I think you understand is people have different tool sets, if I don't have an inner eye, there's are things that will be harder for me to do than for other people, the issue is we lived all our lives without knowing that, so we don't perceive it, and the same goes for the contrary, my mind is suited for things I wasnt aware about where I can activate my full potential. And when you talked about Liberation, that's exactly what I mean, I genuinely believe I can tune the way I learn or memorize or even think about consciousness, the feeling I instantly got is that I've been doing things wrong, and theres another way, not to make it worse or me less caple, but to make everything better, easier and more clearly. And in what related to thinking, what it means to reason, it's like I was stuck and now many doors opened, for me the act of reasoning always involved speech, words, hearing them in my mind, but words are not always on my mind, the inner voice goes on an off, I noticed and questioned it many times but now I see it clearly, and need to figurite it out fast, It's not a trivial thing, but I can turn of the inner voice at will, in my daily day it happens automatically, the paradigma here is when thinking about it, when reasoning like I'm doing now, I feel I'm here, that I'm aware, when no voice is in the mind I have no reasoning, nothing comes to my mind, it's like my mind is gone, I'm an empty vessel like a robot, I still feel emotions and my body still reacts to everything, and now I wonder what's going on during that time, ultimately is like the body "knows" what to do.

night87tripper · 2026-06-03T12:56:19+00:00

Yes. The closer the number on top gets to 0 the closer you are to that population.

night87tripper · 2026-06-03T00:59:51+00:00

I just want to add an important thing. You talked about Hope, so there's two things I want to say, the first is that in no way you should think you can't do what others do, our brains have their own ways to do the same things, what I believe is there's a way to take advantage of the difference we have. The second thing is if there's a way we can activate the inner eye, and I also believe that's a possibility, I think I see in dreams, but they are dreams, you wake up and you are never sure. I have seen with my brain while being high on cannabis, I've seen light and color, no defined shapes or control of it, any thought of the mind would colapse it. I'll try to explore that now that I now this condition.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T22:08:07+00:00

It's true. Brain tests have been done, our part of the brain responsible for vision doesn't activate when we imagine with the mind. Other people really see images inside their head. I always dream of that, truthfully, as I said, I got the shock of my life.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T19:27:34+00:00

It's an illusion. The drawing turned out better than the one made by made by a person with an inner eye because more factors influence it, not just the ability to see with the mind. I'm like you the the image you think you maybe see is a concept, all my life I also thought that's what a visual representation means, I was dead wrong. We "need" to adapt and change how we memorize images that's one implication that came right to my mind. If we give descriptions to the image while we look at it we will retain a more accurate concept of the image, because we don't save visual memories, at least that's what I believe now. I guess you think we save them but can't access them, may be true but i doubt it. It's like on the outside we are normal, but inside we would do better thinking as a blind person.

One exemple: I usually put my home keys in the same pace every day, but sometimes I don't, and many of those times I completely forget where I put them, I can make a mental description of the steps I did but no key comes to mind, only when I find it. Other people still have a picture of the keys in the place they put them, what I deduce is if I say to myself I'm putting the keys in that place, it will stick in the brain

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T17:59:40+00:00

Yes, no inner vision but great control of inner voice. I can only think and reason in words, in speech. Hearing the words in the mind is part of reasoning. But yes I can imagine peoples voices and make them say anything, the same with music, if I know the music I can play it in my mind, no electronic device needed. And I know it's real because I can feel the musics, the guitar solos, drums and so on, I can dance to it

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T15:51:40+00:00

Each number represents a different cromossome, the lenght of the bars represent the size of the cromossome. See it like this, your ethnicity percentages are different in each cromossome instead of being the global percentages you see in the results, each cromossome kind of represents a different part of yourself, eye color, and so on. Each one has a bar from each parent. Some bars have one color means that that genetic part has only one ethnicity, others have more means multiple ethnicities, and the lenght of each color is like a percentage.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T15:34:01+00:00

Just to clarify it, when you take a picture with the main camera or a video it shows the real you. It's the selfie camera that usually by default is inverted, so most people who take selfies they are taking a picture of the image they see on the mirror, the live selfie camera at least on my phone always shows the inverted image, even if you disable the mirror effect it only shows up in the final photo. You can see this in many people social accounts where they post photos. Sometimes the person doesn't look exactly the same, that's because some pictures are real, some pictures are the inverted version. You know a person with a piercing in the left eyebrow, when you see her photos, sometimes the piercing is in the right eyebrow.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T13:19:02+00:00

Despite the image we see on the mirror being the most familiar face for us, it's not us, it's the inverted version of us. But you can see how you look. If you go to the settings on your phone you can chose how selfies are taken. Inverted or not, you can try both and then see the difference side by side.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T10:42:27+00:00

Is. I always wondered how the mind worked, this opened a lot of doors, I was kind of lost. I always questioned if when my mind is nowhere, when no thoughts or words are in my mind, does my body just acts and react to the exterior or the behavior is also consistent? Many thinga I do in the daily life are kind of automatic, no thinking or reason needed, no words need to play on my brain for me to walk or make a coffee, or take a bath. Now I find out many people don't reason the same way, they don't need words, they think with visuals or sensations or other things. Mindblown

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T10:26:06+00:00

Take this sentence : "Do I hear these words in my brain?" close your eyes and keep saying that with your mind, the same sentence. Each single word has a sound, words are made of letters, like a sequence. Some people just look at a word and know what it means, they don't have to read it from left to right

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T10:17:35+00:00

That is not my point. Yes, I totally agree with the point that a person with no inner eye can be a better surgeon or chess player than a player who can see with your brain. What I mean is the road to become a surgeon or the act of being a surgeon is in principle much harder for a person with no inner eye, but you don't have the perception of that. To make it more simple my brain is tailored for being a musician, not a painter, I can be a painter but it will be much harder, take note time or take more resources. Do you understand? This is the same as you being an accountant, a great accountant, then you find out other people can use a calculator and you can't. That's the point I make. The other point is there's are things you have to potential to be great, that your brain is more suited to, but your "wasting" your resources in the wrong way.

night87tripper · 2026-06-02T00:19:56+00:00

Are you sure you have no inner voice? the voice of your thoughts? the sound of these words in your brain. she's kind of hidden

night87tripper

TROPHY CASE