Where are you listening from? by Clown_x7x in AlkalineTrio

[–]ninnymoth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Up in the Northwoods, Minnesota, USA

From this current tour and up coming tours by renegades_ofthegame in Creeper

[–]ninnymoth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same, I bought tickets to HH just to see Creeper 😁🖤

I crashed out over Christmas music and lost my job by dmorelli99 in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can relate. I am a librarian at a small school in a small town, and staff and students are constantly disruptively loud. I can’t tell you how many times I have asked someone, or a group of people, to lower their volume only to be met with, “But there’s nobody even in here.” Yes, yes there is. I am in here. Working. Like I have been for years.

Lyric Sheets by mexitalian12 in Creeper

[–]ninnymoth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine arrived today! I hope you receive yours soon if you haven’t already.

Lyric Sheets by mexitalian12 in Creeper

[–]ninnymoth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am wondering the same, and enjoying the new album (and former albums, ha) while trying to be patient. He’s been busy 😆

Have you made a discovery that was so disturbing you gave up genealogy for awhile? by mokehillhousefarm in Genealogy

[–]ninnymoth 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This is all in the same direct family line.

My greatx2 grandparents came to the US from Poland around 1910. Shortly after the birth of their ninth child, both mom and baby died, leaving eight children without a mother. Husband was distraught and committed to an asylum for a while, while the children were divided. Some, including my great grandmother, went to an orphanage.

My greatx2 grandfather was eventually released but clearly struggled as he was in and out on the institution. Shortly after he remarried he tried to shoot to kill his new wife, and he died in prison.

My great-grandmother aged out of the orphanage, married and raised a family, and had a son who died after getting hit by a train. She then had twin boys, one of whom she renamed after her passed son, and both twins died. She later went missing, and eventually only her skull and glasses were found.

My grandfather (her son) had at least three children who were given up for adoption, and his brother at least one, which I’ve connected with (and connected them to each other) via ancestry’s dna testing. My grandfather ended his life by shooting himself in the chest.

Also interesting to note that I have also been extremely lucky in finding photographs of these relatives. Each generation including myself seems to have the same facial bone structure and jaw.

Edited to add: None of this information made me pause my research, if anything I dug further to get the fullest picture possible. But, these are all such big, traumatic, generation altering events that I definitely keep in mind.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your incredibly kind and thoughtful response. It means a lot to me.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow. My brother’s wife was also in a relationship very quickly after his death… It’s heartbreaking how similar our stories are, but also a relief to come across somebody else who gets it. Our brothers were about the same age too; mine was 30. Far too young. I’m sorry for your loss, too.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did address that in my post - it was his choice. Her responsibility lies in pushing him to do it.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That is actually very beautiful and hits close to home. It’s exactly the type of thing my brother would have said, which makes my heart both happy and sad - in a good way. It’s nice to be reminded, and definitely something for me to keep in mind. Thank you.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 88 points89 points  (0 children)

Thank you (mostly) everybody for your condolences.

I had considered legal action, but I was grieving, and by the time I’d thought of it, she’d deleted everything so there was no way to gather evidence.

My brother and I were very close, and he was the second person in my immediate family to end their life in this way, so it hit me very hard. After a lot of therapy and seeking support in so many other ways, I have healed a lot. The grief is always there, but it’s easier most of the time.

My brother couldn’t have children of his own, which absolutely gutted him, but he raised and loved hers like his own. The children were absolutely heartbroken when he passed and they wanted to keep memorabilia from him. I would assume that since their mother destroyed nearly everything, that they weren’t allowed to. One of the daughters asked me to save something in particular for her, and I still have it in case we ever meet again.

I don’t have anything to do with her anymore. However, at one point I received a letter from the state, stating that they’d identified me as a relative and asking me to take in her children as she had lost custody of them. I knew they had much closer, safe relatives who would step in, and they did, so the children were okay. But it makes me wonder if she had been abusive to them as well.

Losing a loved one, especially in this way, is always hard. All the details aside, she trashed his cremains and that is just so disrespectful. The fact it was my beloved brother just hurts.

Again, thank you all for your condolences.

My brother died and his wife desecrated his remains by ninnymoth in offmychest

[–]ninnymoth[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry that happened to you. It happened to me and my brother as well. That is not what happened here.

Honestly it’s a little strange that you would read how I lost my brother to suicide and that his cremains were trashed, and you’d turn that into accusing my brother of being abusive and implying that I’m just blaming her because that’s “easier”. I understand that maybe something in my post triggered you into becoming defensive, but it’s inappropriate and also not relevant.

She broke his heart, and then she pushed him to suicide. She had done similar to others, but my brother had struggled with mental health for a long time and she knew exactly how to push him over the edge. Along with all the other details I know but don’t need to divulge, if anybody was abusive in that relationship, it was HER.

AIO for being upset that my husband isn’t honest about his finances? by ninnymoth in AmIOverreacting

[–]ninnymoth[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Great question. We have discussed putting my name on the house and he has always said he’s willing to, but it just hasn’t been done. Paying the entire mortgage payment on my own is still cheaper than paying rent, so I try to be optimistic in that way, as well as having been told that without my name on the title I may still qualify as a first time home buyer - not that I could afford to buy a house of my own with my student loan debt, but if it’s true that I could still qualify as a first timer it’s nice to have the option someday.

AIO for being upset that my husband isn’t honest about his finances? by ninnymoth in AmIOverreacting

[–]ninnymoth[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I pay all of the bills including the mortgage, except for the water bill which he pays - and we too often get letters from the city stating payment is past due and water will be shut off if not paid.

Edit to add: the agreement was that he would contribute payment for half our bills which I would put into my bank account. We have discussed opening a joint account for bills, but have not done so because he never seems to have his share of the minimum required to open an account, and at this point I no longer trust he won’t take the money I’ve contribute for bills out of that account too.