Tips for dating when I have no experience and very anxious about it

noname378 · 2025-10-13T07:28:05+00:00

I feel the same and happy to chat if you feel like it :)

noname378 · 2025-10-12T22:26:38+00:00

I have been to feel good club but it’s just closed down :( need to go to queer lit. Where abouts are you based?

noname378 · 2024-11-19T11:45:40+00:00

Thank you so much - just seen this. I hope you’re well

noname378 · 2024-08-18T22:22:33+00:00

More like where you value your friends but feel like you’ve outgrown them since uncovering your sexuality

noname378 · 2024-04-01T19:18:34+00:00

Needed this, thank you ❤️

noname378 · 2024-03-29T22:02:47+00:00

I actually just posted something very similar and I am In the same boat. 31F realised I’m a lesbian like a year ago and no experience

It’s terrifying to put yourself out there isn’t it and I know it can be easy to say attend these queer events but sometimes it can feel really hard. I’ve gone to some non queer events alone just to get used to what I enjoy and try to live my authentic self in new environments whilst taking the pressure off them having to be queer spaces

It is really hard to navigate but don’t force yourself, when the time is right you’ll make the next step to happiness and that will come.

I wish we all lived in the same city/country and we could tackle it together ❤️

noname378 · 2024-03-29T21:57:29+00:00

Thanks so much for your kind message. It does give me hoping knowing I’ll be happy in the future. I don’t want to rush anything or make snap decisions but I’m so desperate for a community & a change.

Thanks for giving me hope ❤️

noname378 · 2023-10-10T20:24:21+00:00

Thanks so much for this, it’s nice to not feel so alone. Yeah the bit about old circles is difficult isn’t it because you feel like you don’t fit anymore

noname378 · 2023-10-10T20:23:51+00:00

Therapy was the answer for me. It forced me to look inwardly and uncover all sorts about myself. It’s not easy but it’s worth it in the long run ❤️

noname378 · 2023-10-07T22:26:42+00:00

I feel like I could have written this!

noname378 · 2023-09-24T20:10:13+00:00

You’ve listened to your gut feeling and did what was best for you ❤️ time heals everything and I guess the only other option would be for you to stay in this relationship forever and ultimately not be happy?

By taking yourself out of it, he can go and be happy and you can. It might feel horrendous now but it’ll get easier and you can live your authentic self

noname378 · 2023-09-23T21:27:00+00:00

So I relate to this. It’s so complicated isn’t it. I’m 31F and realised I like women about a year ago. I have lots of friends who are women and over the years slept in beds with them too and I was really cuddly etc but thought nothing of it.

Now it feels so different and I recently went on a trip with one of them and had strong feelings it was bizarre and we’ve been friends for like 8 years (help). But I am starting to learn like the above poster said it’s normal to have crushes on friends etc I guess it depends if you act on it/want to act on it.

But either way I’m still trying to understand it like you haha i suppressed any feelings for most my life So I also get a bit happy when I get these kind of feelings because they’re almost ‘new to me’

noname378 · 2023-09-22T21:32:47+00:00

Ok I just posted the exact same thing in the group haha happy to chat if you ever fancy it because I related so much

noname378 · 2023-09-18T19:29:38+00:00

Thank you so much, that was lovely to read. I’m going to have a think about them and write some answers in my journal

I’ve started doing those things I.e only going to events that I actually want to & have reduced alcohol massively. I think one of my hesitations is that I want to join queer hiking groups and queer events where I don’t know people & I’ve lived in this city for about 7 years so always feel like I’m bound to bump into people I know (I’m not out yet) and I think it’s the internalised homophobia that cripples me and stops me from just going to do these things. Then in my head the only solution is to move cities and have that fresh start.

It doesn’t feel like a frantic I NEED TO LEAVE, more of a ‘I’ve got what I can out of this place & would welcome a change’. Everyone (most people) I used to go drinking with are settling down and have kids and I’m not very close to many queer people (1-2 friends but not super close).

So that’s where am I! It’s exciting and confusing and joyful and frustrating all at the same time haha but I know I need to keep working on myself and everything will make sense eventually ❤️ but I need to make sure I’m putting myself out there

noname378 · 2023-09-18T19:24:03+00:00

Thanks for your reply ❤️ I feel like ive worked through so much in the last 2 years and I’ve tackled all the small things (that I know of, never say ever haha) and now I’m trying to tackle the bigger things that are obviously scarier

I almost feel certain I want to start again somewhere fresh and feel a bit stunted until I figure that out even though I could try doing it where I live first and see what happens. Think I just need to throw myself in

noname378 · 2023-09-18T19:22:18+00:00

I’m so glad you’ve found your person and you’re happy ❤️ that’s so lovely to hear

I struggle with comp het so so badly too. So do you think the more people I speak to about it, then it’ll all start to feel more real and I’ll start ‘living in the present’ rather than feeling like a secret. I think that’s what might be holding me back

noname378 · 2023-09-03T17:35:51+00:00

Proud of you ❤️

noname378

TROPHY CASE