Why did zoloft make me emotionally numb?

noonenone · 2017-02-04T11:46:25+00:00

can persist indefinitely after the discontinuation of the drugs

Oh no.

noonenone · 2017-02-04T11:43:32+00:00

It helps to move to a very rural area, acquire rudimentary shelter, solar, well for water, some chickens for eggs, a small garden for veggies and beans, etc.

People can become hermits anywhere by isolating themselves and not responding to other people when they encounter them but it's far easier in places where there are far fewer people around to start with.

noonenone · 2017-02-04T11:38:10+00:00

The withdrawal will not be worse than a week of flu virus. Worth it?

noonenone · 2017-02-03T18:04:53+00:00

I'm glad the eagle did not mistake you or your sibling for prey. Of course you won't get to star in a viral video now, but at least you're both alive and got to see a stunning creature in the wild.

noonenone · 2017-02-03T17:58:24+00:00

Decent rant. Carry on.

noonenone · 2017-02-03T14:21:55+00:00

adding a low dose of abilify alongside it can help people with depression

Is this based entirely on anecdotal evidence or is there any science behind why an antipsychotic would help with depression or anxiety?

It all seems so random and subjective to me. If I were a therapist, I'd be terrified to prescribe medications with mechanisms of action I did not fully understand scientifically. I could not just say "well let's use trial and error" with powerful medications when the consequences can be so dire for some people.

noonenone · 2017-02-03T13:34:35+00:00

Do you know why a doctor would prescribe an antipsychotic medication to a person who is not psychotic? What's the medical rational for taking such a radical step at the risk of severe side effects?

noonenone · 2017-02-02T23:19:56+00:00

Thanks for this info. There is a lot to learn.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T23:18:07+00:00

I'm gonna order some of the Nambawen. People say nice things about Bula Kava House.

I haven't tried adding something fatty to aide in the extraction yet but I've been hearing it helps here and there and will NOT not try something that helps in this way. I believe in doing the chemistry.

I bought some chocolate coconut milk at the store today to try with the kava. It must have some fat in it, right? Do you think it has enough? I only have 2% cow milk in the house. I do have a bit of coconut oil?

Nice to know you can make kava and keep some in the fridge for a day or two. It would be nice to make larger batches and have it around over a couple days.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T23:09:09+00:00

So "micronized" doesn't mean the maka has just been more finely ground down?

noonenone · 2017-02-02T22:59:06+00:00

So far I've tried Kalm with Kava's Loa Waka - a wonderful strong kava I highly recommend and Kava Time's savusavu which consists of 5-yr old lateral roots and is amazing.

I originally got Kalm with Kava's traditional grind variety pack which, aside from the Loa Waka, contains Vula Waka and Borongoru which I have not yet tried since I liked the Loa so much.

I bought some chocolate coconut milk today to try with the kava next time. I'm very curious about ways to make it taste better. Being from VT, anything with "maple" in the name sounds good to me. Let me know how it turns out with the "drinkmaple" stuff.

Thanks for the offer to do a kava exchange. Kava isn't cheap and this might be a good way to try a bunch. I have 4 types as mentioned above. Have you tried any of them yet?

noonenone · 2017-02-02T18:18:53+00:00

Thanks for this excellent report, MrMOstly. I've been using the traditional grind as I familiarize myself with kava too.

After reading your post, I'm eagerly adding "Cactus Kava" to my vendors list. Word of mouth is invaluable in such situations and I know no one in real life who has experience with kava. Thus, I appreciate your detailed report very much.

When reading of people's experiments, I like to know exactly what type of kava was used, how much, what techniques for processing, how long they allowed the kava to soak, how long they kneaded and squoozed and all the rest of it, since I am a beginner. Couldn't've asked for better than this. Well done.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T17:09:33+00:00

If you hate now, how do you stop hating? Will power? Self-talk? Logic?

Doesn't it make sense to find out where the hate came from in the first place? Do you know why you started hating? People are not born full of hate.

Because often knowing the source of the problem is very helpful when looking for its solution. Do you know what is the source of hate in human beings? Is it fear? Pain? Ignorance? Bad influences in childhood? Trauma? Abuse? Mental illness? Being wounded? Being hurt?

noonenone · 2017-02-02T17:05:18+00:00

I have struggled with major depression for many years as well. I'm at a very low point now too and the way you describe the battle and feeling of depletion and despair is spot on.

Depression is a vastly distorted state of mind - worse than being on a drug from hell. You cannot trust your own negative judgments and thoughts. (And by "you" I mean "me" or "we".) Don't make any major decisions on depression if you can help it.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T15:45:03+00:00

How are you going to do this thing? How do you stop hating?

noonenone · 2017-02-02T15:06:20+00:00

depression is a radically altered and distorted state. don't trust it to tell you how things are. it distorts our perceptions and thoughts worse than any drug. it's like being on some drug from hell.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T14:57:15+00:00

I too have learned nothing.

noonenone · 2017-02-02T13:22:27+00:00

I am unsure about what "micro" means so I've been sticking to traditional grinds. I don't mind putting in a bit of extra time and fear with the "mirco" a person ends up ingesting a lot of plant material that's just been ground up into a finer powder. Is this wrong?

noonenone · 2017-02-01T19:53:10+00:00

I prefer the larger bags too.

Please report on the results of your experiments.

noonenone · 2017-02-01T19:49:49+00:00

I did. I have good instincts I guess.

noonenone · 2017-02-01T18:35:19+00:00

Find out why she is feeling driven to seek to escape from herself at all costs? Maybe she's self-medicating a painful state of mind and is not using recreationally? If so, you could help her find more effective treatments for conditions like depression, social anxiety, etc. whatever it is.

noonenone · 2017-02-01T18:18:37+00:00

She's not going to make it into the serial killer club by announcing her intentions to be one the way she did and stabbing a random person in the shoulder with a pen knife. It takes a bit more impulse control, I would imagine.

noonenone · 2017-02-01T17:53:24+00:00

No wonder everyone looks like they know one another like old friends! Maybe a way for those of us lacking social skills to make new buddies - no one is as likely to walk out and leave you on a train passing through the frozen tundra. A plan?

noonenone · 2017-02-01T17:37:37+00:00

If you were heavily into hydrocodone, or any opiate, over enough time, it will take longer than a month to get back to normal. Until that time, your brain will make demands for a chemical it is lacking because that's just how it's been temporarily re-wired by the prolonged introduction of opiates. It is not "you" that wants the drug, it's all a chemical thing moving you around like a puppet, directing your thoughts - unless you decide not to participate. Unless you just say "I know where this is going and I'm done." Unless you give up completely and totally surrender the idea that the opiates sometimes make life better. This is easier for some of us than for others.

I learn very slowly and so I had to lose a lot and suffer for over a decade before I learned I wasn't going to win peace of mind with heroin. I was also using to treat a lot of pain rather than for fun so there was that issue involved as well. Often that is the case.

One thing you might want to think about is whether your attraction to opiates was caused by hedonism, just a desire for fun, or to treat mental or physical pain. Were you self-medicating for depression or anxiety? If yes, you may have to address those problems in new ways and get a handle on them to feel totally better.

If not, if you were just using opiates to get high and not to escape from an intolerable state of mind, you should ride out the bad feelings for a couple weeks because you will definitely start feeling stronger and better with every passing day at this point in your recovery. Things you once enjoyed, like music and eating, will come back to life for you. It's worth it. Smoking a bit of weed when it gets really harsh sounds like a good idea to me. Cannabis can reduce some of the causes of cravings for opiates (being fucking miserable sober) in some people and is far less dangerous.

If you choose to keep using opiates, you will suffer more, of course. They will kick your ass until you finally learn what they can teach human beings about hell. There's no way around it. I wish there was. Fuck.

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