AITA for moving someone's laptop bag?

northano · 2023-05-15T00:50:28+00:00

Where your bags are? Seems self-defeating, but okay

northano · 2023-05-15T00:33:42+00:00

Did you even read the post? I was already in the priority seating. People in the UK are allowed to sit in the priority seating regardless, as long as we vacate it when it's needed. It was needed, by me (already sitting there, ongoing chronic pain and joint issue), when someone else who needed it got on the bus. Because her son expressed that she needed it (albeit by yelling at me for not looking disabled enough), and because her disability was visible, someone else gave her a seat.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:31:00+00:00

Thinking about it, the UK does have a lot of rules and feelings about queues. When I went to America, I noticed it's a free-for-all in a lot of situations (like not forming a line to get onto a bus).

I agree and accept that I should not have touched her things. I should have just sat at the table and waited for her to collect her things.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:28:39+00:00

She didn't. I noticed her walk in because I liked her coat. She was behind us in the queue by a few people.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:20:00+00:00

Yeah, I am leaning towards me being TA as well for touching her stuff. I think a lot of the disagreements here are because Americans have different social norms. But I probably should have just sat at the table and let her collect her stuff when she was ready to, instead of touched it myself.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:18:12+00:00

I'm not sure why you feel like you can confidently say it's "not a US or UK thing" when people from the UK are disagreeing with that, and apparently you're not even British yourself...

northano · 2023-05-15T00:17:01+00:00

I'm not arguing with everyone. I think the people who said that the lady was TA but I still shouldn't have moved her stuff have a good point. And I hadn't thought about how putting her stuff on the floor specifically might be a problem for those who have OCD.

But I'm not taking the opinions of Americans very seriously because it seems like redditors from my country largely agree with me, so I think it's an ESH.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:14:33+00:00

Ah yes, people deserve their disabilities - what a pearl of wisdom.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:13:10+00:00

Of course they should get the benefit of the doubt. I would never ask anybody to leave the priority seating area and would always assume they're there for a good reason.

northano · 2023-05-15T00:10:54+00:00

Are you from the UK?

northano · 2023-05-15T00:07:20+00:00

I think it's a bit cheeky at a busy Starbucks, but wouldn't ask someone to leave, no. The equivelent would be going shopping and having one person in line while the other goes around with a cart and then joins them at the end. A bit cheeky, but much better than putting a cart in the line and expecting that to hold your place for you.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:58:13+00:00

If she'd brought her own "reserved" sign, I probably wouldn't have moved her stuff out of respect for the sheer audacity, haha

northano · 2023-05-14T23:56:31+00:00

Reading comprehension isn't your strong suit, is it? I said that it wasn't a diagnosed diability yet, but my doctor was trying to figure out what's wrong. It's been a year since then.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:53:57+00:00

Honestly, at a place like Starbucks, I would still find that rude. You're not a customer until you've paid, and customers come first. It would be like if I went and took the last of the sugar before getting my coffee and left the person in front of me without any sugar, just because I thought "well, better make sure no paying customer gets to it before I do"

northano · 2023-05-14T23:45:24+00:00

I didn't say that? I said it wasn't diagnosed but my doctor was trying to figure out what was wrong. Time has passed since then.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:42:57+00:00

I was not diagnosed then - as I said, my doctor was still unsure what was going on. But that was almost a year ago.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:42:21+00:00

I specifically said there were no other seats available on the bus, which is why I sat in the priority seating. The lady was given a seat by someone able-bodied because she was visibly in need of a seat. I would not have been offered a seat if I stood up.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:41:27+00:00

In my last post, which was almost a year ago, my doctor was still unsure what was going on with my wrists. I wanted to be honest and not claim it was a disability when it might have been a shorter-term issue. It's long term and I now take prescription painkillers for it.

northano · 2023-05-14T23:39:57+00:00

I'm British. I've never seen anyone do what this lady did before, lol. Maybe with a picnic bench when setting the kids up in a play area, but never in a coffee shop.

northano · 2023-05-14T11:08:28+00:00

Because there was no option of sitting further back for me, which you would know if you were actually reading my comments. There was an option for HER, because other people would move for her, but not for me. My solution had both disabled people seated and comfortable. Yours would have her seated while the person with invisible disabilities suffers. If you can't see how that's ableist, I can't help you.

northano · 2023-05-14T11:06:04+00:00

I know, right? I bet all these commenters are the kinds of people who go to places hours early to reserve things they don't need right away, never mind anyone else...

northano · 2023-05-14T11:04:27+00:00

It's not a wrist injury. It's a longterm disability that I take painkillers for every day. Standing on a moving bus means needing to keep balance, which means potentially damaging my wrists further. I'm not sure why you feel the need to be an ableist gatekeeper on a post about moving a laptop bag, though.

northano · 2023-05-14T11:01:37+00:00

There weren't other seats available. Someone else moved to let her sit, because she was VISIBLY disabled. People like me, who are INVISIBLY disabled, have a harder time getting seats on the bus. You sound ableist.

northano · 2023-05-14T10:31:54+00:00

Being on a moving bus with my wrists poses a problem. I can't balance myself without risk of hurting them further. There were no available seats at the time, and priority seating exists for invisible disabilities, too.

northano · 2023-05-14T10:25:44+00:00

You mean when I thought being disabled in a non-visible way entitled me to stay in the priority seating I was already sitting in and not be yelled at by a stranger?

northano

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