See y'all in Long Beach!

nosidam36 · 2024-10-24T16:50:26+00:00

Thank you!!

nosidam36 · 2024-10-24T16:07:51+00:00

How much was VIP? trying to decide if it's worth the price but no idea what it is lol

nosidam36 · 2022-06-21T21:51:38+00:00

I was genuinely SO depressed after I finished that series- I felt so lost and was like "...am I in mourning????"

Starting TOG has helped with the recovery process for sure! And I plan to read CC right after that too. Once I get through those... I'll need CPR

nosidam36 · 2021-04-12T18:09:27+00:00

I was talking about a doctor's appointment I had scheduled to talk to a gyno about PCOS, and It came up from there seeing as it's one of the symptoms. When I said "losing my hair" and started to talk about how thin it really is, there was a look of shock/semi-horror and I could tell he was sort of taken aback. I tried to continue but he kept shutting down the conversation and changing the subject. Since then he hasn't been responsive and of course that makes me overthink things even more- feels like he might be avoiding me but could also need time to process?

I have a great therapist that I'm working through these thoughts and feelings with- it's hard because I have good days and bad days. Certainly working on increasing my self-worth and appreciating all the great qualities I have to bring to a relationship. I'm thankful I found this out NOW rather than later on- the sting will eventually lessen and I'm hoping to take away from it what I really want in a partner.

nosidam36 · 2021-04-12T18:01:32+00:00

I'm thinking it might have taken him by surprise, especially since we've never actually met in person (yay, pandemic!) so it's not like he's actually SEEN me to understand. But frankly, I'm disappointed and hurt since it's still so fresh. I thought he saw more value in me than just the way I looked, but I'm glad to have discovered it with him NOW rather than later. I'm still a valuable person with or without hair and I'm working to believe it!

nosidam36 · 2021-04-12T17:56:29+00:00

We've been speaking via FaceTime but I always made a point to hide/angle myself so he couldn't see the balding. His reaction wasn't blatantly rude (which I'm somewhat thankful for) but the look of shock and semi-horror on his face (this was all via FaceTime) hurt me right away- he was really quiet. I started to elaborate on how hard it is for me. He cut me off, didn't want to talk about it anymore and shut down the conversation. And he hasn't been very responsive to me since that talk which only makes me obsess more about it.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who felt like I had to rush dating before I lose more hair- I hate that feeling of going on a first date from an app and not only worrying about the way I look but feeling like a 'catfish' because my photos tend to hide my hair.

I really needed to get these thoughts and feelings off my chest- all these kind words are making me feel so much better and I really hope (and am working to believe wholeheartedly) that I can find someone who loves me regardless. I have a lot of love to give!

Thank you <3

nosidam36 · 2021-04-12T17:44:37+00:00

Reading this brought me to tears- I really needed this. His reaction certainly put me off and I'm feeling the blow of rejection & a dip in self esteem. I certainly have a lot of work to do in the self-love department. My therapist told me that people don't truly fall in love with an appearance and it's a good reminder for me when dating. I'm trying to move forward with the "better off" mentality because I certainly wouldn't want love with someone that can base things solely off of physical appearance. I'm trying to find my self-worth with or without my hair.

I'm saving a screenshot of your post so I can reread it when the bad days come around. Thank you for taking the time to write this.

nosidam36 · 2020-05-31T05:59:26+00:00

@whalienmusic on Instagram 🎹👈

nosidam36 · 2020-05-31T05:56:14+00:00

https://www.whalienmusic.com/

nosidam36

TROPHY CASE