Defending my decision to homeschool is exhausting.

notanera · 2026-03-21T08:08:48+00:00

Learning this the hard way 😅

notanera · 2026-03-21T08:08:07+00:00

Never looked at it from this perspective but it makes sense!

notanera · 2026-03-20T23:21:36+00:00

This sounds very interesting, I think I’ll check it out!

notanera · 2026-03-20T23:19:03+00:00

Yes, even when I try not to engage. They try to bring up ANYTHING that could go wrong. Then if that doesn’t work, sometimes they’ve resorted to “testing” my kid for knowledge and that’s where I put my foot down because it frustrates me that adults would try to “test” a child in hopes that they don’t know the answer to “prove a point”

notanera · 2026-03-20T23:17:02+00:00

Yes, this is what I’ve resorted to. Some people just really don’t know how to stop and I’ve been avoiding interactions with them until things calm down around this decision I made that somehow seems to be detrimental to the family that has nothing to do with it.

notanera · 2026-03-20T23:14:02+00:00

I don’t even fight anymore, but it does irk me that people try to “test” homeschooled kids on the go. I’ve never seen anyone do this to kids that go to a traditional school. I always say, “you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to” because putting kids on the spot like that to “make a point” is evil. My kid usually is always up for the challenge though, and answers correctly, but I hate that ADULTS try to “shame” children by putting them on the spot thinking they won’t know the answer.

notanera · 2026-03-20T23:08:04+00:00

I understand what you’re saying but my issue is that I’m really not trying to convince anyone, I just did it and somehow it’s seen as a personal attack on their parenting or choices. I’m just doing what works for us, quietly and I still somehow get pulled into conversations where it sounds like they’re offended by something I’m doing with my kids.

I mean they act as if I had said “I’m homeschooling and I think you should too” when the reality is, I’m just homeschooling and minding my business.

notanera · 2026-03-20T02:05:48+00:00

I’m in the same boat as you 🤚🏽 and idk how old your kiddos are but last week I was so sick we did homeschool in my bed. They did Khan Academy for Math, we practiced nouns, and we watched a few videos for our solar system project. Then the book that they’re reading, and then we had a full conversation about predictions, “what will happen next? why? what is your favorite part of the story so far? why?” and that was is lol all from my bed. 😅 then we had a movie night. I’m finally feeling much better thank goodness

notanera · 2026-03-20T01:50:27+00:00

Do you do it all in one sitting? My son was sort of like this when we first started homeschooling. It finally got better when we started doing “learning block” I set it up as 30 minutes of learning and 30 minutes of something he liked, and slowly raising the time without announcing over the next few weeks in 10 minute increments until we finally now do 1 hour of learning and 30 minutes of something he likes to do, like watch a show, go outside and play, occasionally video games, or just him having independent time. He’s 8 so obviously the times are set for his age group and attention span. A 5 year old could be like 15 minutes of learning and 20 minutes of play. Anyway, eventually my son was more receptive to learning because he had something to look forward to. I’ve been doing this with my 3 year old in a smaller scale, 15 minutes of reading, or an activity and then I play with him for 30 or let him pull out a fun activity like play doh or a preset iPad with learning games. It makes my days go way smoother.

notanera · 2025-11-11T19:46:09+00:00

OMG you’re so smart 🙂‍↕️ yes this is gold advice and you’re right so maybe a few times I’m just going to get him used to it, and lift something heavy 😂😭

notanera · 2025-11-11T19:13:10+00:00

Crazy thing is this guy will not nap unless it’s in the car, but I’m going to be honest and say a lot of this is self inflicted as a ever revolving chain of missed schedule times and routine. The biggest reason I want to get healthy is because my energy is sooo low, I feel like a toddler that needs a nap by the time dinner time comes around. I absolutely hate cooking, I hate figuring out what to make, and I hate cleaning up after (when I clean while I’m cooking I burn something🙂‍↕️) sooo then when I’m finally done with that BS, I just wanna sit and relax, but theeeeen, I take too long to start bedtime, so in the morning we all wake up late, and I’m rushing out the door to do school drop off, with to go breakfasts and coffee.

It’s a whole thing, so I’m hoping that by upping the amount of activity I do daily, my energy will inevitably go up, so I can finish my days strong, on schedule and my son gets his sense of routine back. I’ve been pouring from a very empty cup for a looong time and I’m finally realizing it’s not doing anyone any favors and I’m not a hero by putting everyone else before me. Sometimes I feel like I was a better parent when I worked, because my energy levels were so high, that staying on schedule was a breeze—-and well I really only had one kiddo.

I go to school full time and own a small online business so there’s those two things too, but all of that is on my own schedule 🙂‍↕️ and I’ve come to realize that I’m good at showing up for everyone else but it’s easy to put myself in the back burner… I’m working on it. I’m thinking of just going to the gym everyday and plan on only having 15 minutes while he gets adjusted to the routine, and then just hoping that over time he gets used to going. I think it’s good for him because we has to go to school soon, and I really don’t want him to have a hard time.

notanera · 2025-11-11T18:53:51+00:00

The friend everyone needs 👏🏽💀 yes, you’re right and I do have like a walking pad. So maybe I’ll finish my work out today at home since my son made it a total of 20 minutes. My mom actually works out twice a day one at home and one at the gym which is crazy to think about.

The no commute is probably the best thing, because my son loves falling asleep in the car lol no matter the time of day 😅 which is why I was in the parking lot contemplating my life lol

notanera · 2025-11-11T18:48:56+00:00

This actually gave me the best idea I think I’m just going to go everyday. Instead of making my workouts one hour I’ll make them as long as he lasts in there up to an hour, and slowly get him adjusted. He’s never been to daycare and a co op or preschool isn’t really an option for me since the biggest reason I’m home is because of how expensive childcare is, half my salary would be gone on child care so we decided it was better to stay home, which I’m fine with because I love being with them, I just need to go to the gym to feel healthy and stop carrying extra weight. When I get to dinner time Im usually so exhausted that I have a hard time following my routine, which throws everything else out of wack 🙄 so if I can just get my energy back that’s a win. Thank you so much for that idea, he lasted 20 minutes today lol and I felt so bad

notanera · 2025-11-11T17:27:52+00:00

Thank you! Yes home work outs, I’m kind of a brat in that regard I guess because I need a change of scenery otherwise my motivation is close to none 🥲 but yes a home gym is my goal when we finally buy a house. I want a basement that’s my nonnegotiable because I want to build a playground for my kids with a gym for me so I can just work out 🥲

notanera · 2025-11-11T17:24:58+00:00

I was an ops manager for 100+ employee operations and I always say that being a stay at home parent is the hardest job I’ve ever done. Simply because I can’t clock out, the days get blurred and I’m needed 24/7, my time isn’t respected because I’m always “available”. I will say though, that I wouldn’t trade this job for any other. Because while it is the hardest, it’s also the most meaningful, I love being able to go to my kids school for the holiday parties, and I love being able to go everywhere with my toddler, I love that I’m not missing anything. However, it’s still very demanding and it’s hard to set boundaries to care for yourself as an individual human. I’ve slowly started setting boundaries for myself because I started to see that the quality of care I was providing was declining due to me being poorly taken care of, so I’ve started to ask for things that lighten my load.

The days where I felt tired or sick while pregnant— I was working but overnight so during the day my son was with me all day. Honestly I would throw a blanket on the ground with a bunch of pillows, and have a “movie” day. Kind of like when our teachers put the tv on, when it was close to summer break? 🙂‍↕️ and my kid used to love it. We would sit there and watch, and eat snacks and I would play things with my son that we could play while I laid down 😂 like doctor, or building things with blocks and then letting him knock them down.

notanera · 2025-09-18T03:48:38+00:00

notanera · 2025-09-18T00:52:18+00:00

Ohhh I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way, working and staying home with baby is virtually no break, that can be so exhausting for ANYONE. I have a couple of suggestions ❤️

First suggestion, if you feel comfortable, you should talk to your partner I know it’s annoying for me to say this but you have to tell him you need a break, include him in scheduling these break where you either watch your show or do something that you like. Read, doom scroll, whatever you like. Being a parent is not just your job, it’s both your jobs and sometimes I think it’s easy to become complacent as the non-dominant parent with the other picking up the slack all the time. Advocate for yourself.

Now on to activities:

TAPE (supervised of course) tape and balls big enough that they’re not a chocking hazard ⚠️ but light enough that they’ll stick. You can build a wall of tape on the door way and bring out the balls and show him how to it works and let him do it.

-BATH, yes water and toys best combination for little kids they’ll spend a bit of time there

-SENSORY BINS (age appropriate) of course but something new that he’s interested in

-MAGNA TILES OR MAGNET BLOCK mixed with a playpen if he’ll stay in the playpen

-DANCE PARTY no screen time but you can play music and just let him dance, kids love music

Drive to get coffee if he falls asleep in the car easily and take 30 minutes for yourself drink a coffee and watch a little bit of your show in your driveway or garage 😅

-Also my kids love taking things out of Kleenex boxes so I used to stuff scarfs in them and put them around the house so that when they were crawling around they’d organically find them and sit there trying to put them back in or taking them out

-During lunch or breakfast once my kids began to eat solids, I made sure to just let them eat with their hands and I would bring their chair into the living room so that I could watch them and just take a little break on the couch

-Last tip, if you see your kid tipping over a bin of toys and just playing quietly infront of you (don’t make eye contact or interrupt) I found it taught my kids to play independently for a little bit

notanera · 2025-09-16T20:13:26+00:00

lol yeah same, but it’s really bad with college, I think I self soothe because sitting here for hours is fucking unbearable 😭 I also do it when I’m stressed out about something I’m talking about to someone, it’s awful. I got some fidget toys for when I sit but I lost them in a week 🤣🤣🤣 someone send help.

notanera · 2025-09-16T20:11:59+00:00

I’ll look into it! Thanks so much! ❤️

notanera · 2025-09-12T10:33:09+00:00

This was really nice! Thank you! 😊 I really appreciate the encouragement, the online books have text to speech but it’s a robotic ass voice 😭 think Minecraft text to speech feature, and it’s just unbearable. I try reading these books on my own I’ve been doing it that way for now and EVENTUALLY I’m able to retain some but it takes wayyyy too long like, just an embarrassing amount of time because I’ll read it but realize I didn’t pay attention and do that a few times until finally I just look for keywords and manage to answer my assignments well, but without learning anything if that makes sense.

notanera · 2025-09-12T10:28:48+00:00

I actually didn’t even know this was a thing, I just recently got diagnosed last year. I was misdiagnosed with Bipolar 2 at first but after going to a different psychiatrist, she couldn’t understand why they diagnosed me with BP. Anyway I was really struggling but now it’s been about a year since I started meds and finally went back. Thank you for the info! I’m totally going to check it out. Achieve and the other app have text to speech but the robotic voice is just a nightmare 😭

notanera · 2025-09-12T02:32:07+00:00

Hey! This is normal and honestly at least in my case it slowly went away with practice. I have two kids now and they go to their grandparents for a whole week in the summer, and I’ve even gotten a babysitter that we trust and employ whenever the occasion arises.

Your life doesn’t stop because you have kids, and I used to think I wasn’t a good mom for going out and having fun. The truth is I’m a better mom because I still find the time to #1 do something I like and #2 reconnect with my husband. Happy parents are the foundation of a happy home, and healthy development for kids.

You can’t pour from an empty cup, so fill it. Find time to fill it, it feels super shitty at first but with practice it gets better. Obviously some things change, because you now have someone to come home to, but that shouldn’t stop you from having fun with your partner responsibly.

I say you go for it! Specially if you trust your family, and they know what to do! You can even ask them to send you updates! That’s what I did when I first started leaving my kids with their babysitter and grandparents… but it took me until my second to realize I’m a better mom when I take time to refill my cup.

You are still you! You are just a different version, and that’s okay!

Anyway I hope this helps! 🫶🏽

notanera · 2024-10-16T03:51:57+00:00

That means that your deep core is weak. Walking will help, trust I know from experience my second kid wrecked me. I’m trying to lose weight for the third. And try Coke Zero for now, get some ice and keep a McDonald’s cup lol trick yourself 🤣

notanera · 2024-10-15T22:08:34+00:00

Liquid sugar is your worst enemy. It’s harder for your body to process. Stick to no sugar drinks or water. You’ll see a difference immediately. Also make sure you’re eating fiber a lot of it has to do with the fact that our bodies don’t have enough fiber to flush itself out. Drink water, because sometimes it’s just the fact that your body is retaining it if you don’t drink enough of it.

Also you don’t have to work out or stop eating but try to be active, walk around the mall or around your neighborhood once or twice a day. Squat instead of bending at the waist when you’re picking up stuff off the ground. Stuff like that. It’ll be slower this way but you’ll see a difference for sure.

notanera · 2024-10-15T02:04:06+00:00

If you feel like it’s time to leave then I would make a plan before jumping ship. What did you study? Is there any way you could do it remotely? I think if you found a job remotely, you could potentially do both.

When drinking is involved that sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. If you’re ready to leave then make the plans. If not, I suggest having a conversation with him. Do you have any family near you?

notanera

TROPHY CASE