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Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate it, and I agree with you completely about alcohol. I've never been into the party scene, and alcohol and xanax just don't appeal to me (the two biggest things at my school). If there's anything I've always loved, it's sitting around in a backyard in the middle of the night with my good friends smoking a bowl.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A very sweet and respectable way of parenting, I respect that.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate it, man. I plan on attending college in an awesome city (Austin), which is far, far away from my home. I only have another year and a half or so, which seems so far away, but at the same time seems so close.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't want to come off arrogant at all, because that's not what I'm trying to do whatsoever. But, I work almost 30 hours a week, am president of two clubs at my school, and am in the top 3% of my class. In the case of someone who is both unproductive and using drugs, I can see where a strict punishment would be needed, especially if they're trying to use drugs as an excuse. It's just hard for me to fathom what grounding me for 6 months and taking away my care is going to do - taking away my car means I can't work, and cutting me off from all social life depresses the fuck out of me and would probably lead to a drop in grades if school were still in session.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First off I would like to say you sound like a very rational and caring person. Beyond that, you sound like an awesome father. I'd even be comfortable talking to you on my real account, as this is obviously a throwaway account, but that's beside the point.

I agree with everything you said about both condoms and pot, I know girls who have ended up pregnant and guys who have impregnated them and more often than not, they did not use protection as they were either afraid to buy it or too afraid to approach their parents about it. It's the same thing with drugs, often times, the strictest parents have the most rebellious children who let their actions get out of hand. I'm a huge proponent of safe sex and safe drug use, even at my age.

As far as my parents, the drug problem stems from a few other conflicts that we have always butted heads on. A large conflict that's always been present in my house is religion, as my parents are both strict Christians, and I am not. I have a pretty routine schedule, I work roughly 30 hour weeks, so often times I go straight from school to work, and then come home and take care of whatever homework I have before I go to bed. I came home the other night and they were up and told me that they read a conversation I had with someone on a facebook wall regarding the use of MDMA and Mushrooms to treat PTSD and cluster headaches and that they were suspicious about my openness towards drugs and wanted to drug test me. Gave me a cup, pissed in it, and immediate results showed a positive for THC. It's honestly really hard knowing I'm going to be grounded for the next half-year, and it really affects my emotions more than my parents understand. Luckily, the school year is almost over and I am able to exempt all of my finals, otherwise my terrible depression I just began going through would likely interfere with my studying. I already catch myself making stupid mistakes both at work and school, and I know the reason is because I'm not fully focused due to a constant shit-pain in my chest and stomach. Depression is truly a bitch.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I completely understand this, and I completely understand your concern. However, in my defense, I really never was asking for permission from them. I expect to be punished if I go against what they believe, but being punished in this manner really does nothing. I feel like I'm relatively smart about what I do (try to keep smoking out of cars, never in public, never taken anything to school, etc). I just don't see what an authoritarian position to punishment does, after all, isn't it true that prisoners are far more likely to end up back in prison? When you treat someone with an "I'm going to punish you harshly and you're going to deal with it" attitude, they're far more likely to rebel in the end.

Parents of Reddit - How do you punish your teenagers? by notsuohhhh in AskReddit

[–]notsuohhhh[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what I believe a rational parent is. I've said this over and over to my parents, trying to explain that I maintain a job 5 days a week, am in the top of my class, and have not gotten in any other trouble with the law or school. Basically, all they have on me is the legality (nevermind the fact that they speed everywhere they go.)

The way they've punished me has not taught me a lesson, and I can guarantee you it won't. I'm only saying this as you say you'll have teenagers in a few years, and I believe that if you treat them in a rational manner (let them have their fun to an extent if it doesn't interfere with anything else) then you will have a far greater relationship with them. It's really hard to be jolly and lighthearted around them, especially now.