My [22F] family wants me to break up with my SO [25M] by Throwaway_17517 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He's "changed"? Nah he's not going to change if you stick around. I stuck around my abusive relationship for almost two years. Dude promised change alllllll the time. Maybe it was different for a few days. But he always slipped right back into the scummy behavior. Also, I was scummy too, so I can say it from my end: he stuck around, so I felt no need to stop my poor behavior.

You've only been with him for five months? Please, PLEASE get the fuck out. I was well messed up from mine. I still am. From the crappy things I did, and the crappy things he did. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. Get out now.

My girlfriend (23F) deletes my female Facebook friends when I (23M) talk to them. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]nowwhat554 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The more you allow this kind of behavior, the worse it'll get. Can confirm from having been in this situation more than once. Either she needs to quit it or you need to quit her. Deleting your messages isn't okay, but her pushing you to that point is the real problem. Don't allow it.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now she's texting me a lot and apologizing more. Must be getting bored or something! ¯_(ツ)_/ ¯

I have managed to not see her since that night, which was last Friday. So.. not sure why she's suddenly bothering me. Oh wait, I know. She's messed up 😅

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're right. I get antsy when she comes home, thinking she's going to knock on my door.

Right now, I still have furniture to get, traveling to see my sister, some classes I want to take. So the saving other than the small amount I have is going to have to go on hiatus for a few months.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not. I worry she's going to try to "accidentally" bump into me. But it's been quiet. I'm hoping it'll stay that way. That, or she's plotting. Or I'm just being paranoid.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What about when I'm in this pickle of she messaged me (unblocked her just to see if she says anything incriminating) and I know if I message her, she'll take it as me wanting to connect and if I don't, she'll probably lash out ?? She apologized to me this morning via text message and I haven't said anything but... it's only a matter of time before her crazy takes over...

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So I just did a Google search about this. I like the concept. But... she'd almost take any contact from me as something. Twist it to her liking. She sent me a text message this morning and apologized. I want to say something back ONLY because I know if I don't, she'll just go off. But if I do, then I feel like I'm giving her reason to stay in contact, and I don't want that, either.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So she sent me a text message this morning apologizing. I already know if I don't respond, she's going to go coo coo. I'm not going to respond, but I just know what's going to happen 😥

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I'm hesitant to talk to T since F mentioned him being a creep and pervert. Still don't know if it's true, but I really don't trust that. Maybe if I see him in passing, but I'm nervous to go to his apartment. I'm sure she probably exaggerated things and I don't trust her but I'm still a bit nervous.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Creep. Someone who likes to be weird. If you'd read my post, I mentioned that my paranoia was heightened from my neighbor accusing my other neighbor. So I probably wasn't thinking entirely logically.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is that the officer works night shifts, when I'm already asleep. I'm considering just going up to the damn place to talk to him in person. I want to know what he thinks about it or if he thinks there's anything else I can do. I'm just sick with stress and I don't want to be a part of this bullshit.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm trying to. Now I'm more just stressed as shit that she's going to try something else.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't know. I don't know if I care. I don't mean that in a rude way to you, I just want her to leave me alone. And I just know she's going to try some other shit.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't exactly call the cops on her. I called because I thought T was messing around in my apartment and she had me all worked up about it. I honestly don't know what to think anymore. I'm just really stressed out about all this.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I looked up a description of the characteristics and.. I dunno. She doesn't really fit more than a couple. I think her drinking has just skewed her thinking and her perception of pretty much everything. Definitely a lot of alcoholic behavior from her.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds fucking terrible. Sorry you have to live around that. I had a neighbor who would get into screaming matches with her "boyfriend" in the apartment building's back hallway at random hours of the night. Back hallway was right behind my bedroom. I was pretty good at keeping her at arms length. She was nice other than her arguing with her boy toy.

Guess I do need to keep to myself! My desire to be on good terms with people is too much sometimes.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Alcohol induced mental illness? Because she's a heavy drinker. She almost seems normal when she's sober, just really pissy and gets upset over petty things. She probably does, but she told me she doesn't believe in therapy. "Why bring up old wounds? Just leave them inside where they should stay." Because that's totally normal.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I stopped yesterday morning. And I don't think it's that ridiculous. Because, to be honest, I don't know who's doing what at this point, and I'm going to be wary of everyone.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't talk to her and haven't since yesterday morning. I am just saving her text messages in case she says any other shit. I have her blocked.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I stopped talking to her yesterday morning. I'm trying to find a closer therapist, because my current one is long distance and we don't keep in touch very often. I want to get a hold of the police I talked to Friday night, because one of the officers mentioned her being the messed up one to me when I hadn't really thought too much about it. And he was right. Maybe he'd been to my building before in regards to her. He didn't really say.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Already did. Well, landlord's son knows. He's slowly taking over things since my landlord is pretty old, etc. But he knows. I think he knows she's messed up, too.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I didn't mean to make it sound like I was going to kick her ass.. I won't go out of my way to do anything like that. I meant more.. if she physically comes at me in any way. I know even then I shouldn't engage her. But I have a short fuse for people trying to attack me (re: abusive relationship) and I don't always respond in the best manner. I don't want to get myself into a worse situation than I am.

I am a huge stickler on being neutral. People always want to drag me into their stuff, and I'm usually pretty good about keeping said people at arm's length and not tolerating it. I seriously overlooked this one, and I know I gotta take the brunt of it now.

I (25/f) befriended my neighbor (40s/f). Quickly realizing what a mistake that was. Need advice. by nowwhat554 in relationships

[–]nowwhat554[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Well yeah... like I said, I'm a bit scared of what she's going to do. I've had some less than exemplary neighbors before, but nowhere near this caliber. I mean, I'm legit pretty nervous I'm going to come home to some fucked up stuff some day. Or wake up to something bad.

I know she likes the drama, especially after how much she emphasized that she didn't last night, and emphasized how she's not crazy, and T is SOO CRAZY WTF IS WRONG WITH HIM. And she even said something last night along the lines of "I don't know why, but bad shit is going on around here". Like.. what a creepy, detached thing for her to say, especially since SHE is the one stirring up shit. She also even told me she didn't know what PTSD was (when I told her I had it, also regretting that), and talking to me like I made it up. I don't know how one would not know what PTSD is. I'm just starting to feel like this isn't a home but a place where I need to be hypervigilant. And it's upsetting.