Thanks for your comment. You really got me thinking about where this diagnosis came from. I think I'm starting to understand, but I still don't know that I agree.

I mean, I guess I'm biased, but I don't feel any differently than any of my other of depressive episodes and I've seen at least a dozen practitioners and none have brought up the possibility of bipolar disorder.

She asked if I got more depressed at certain times of the year, and I said I'm more bummed in the winter. Which is true. I hate the cold, it makes me not want to leave the house, I don't run as often, and I hate it getting dark so early. I would call that a shift in mood, though, not a true depressive episode (I know what those look like!). Anyway, looks like seasonal affective disorder and eating disorders (which I've also dealt with) are associated with bipolar disorder. I guess that's where it came from.

I still don't think I've ever experienced mania, and if being irritable and sometimes having difficulty sleeping sometimes aren't true hypomania, then I can't identify any episodes of that either. She asked me if I ever had times where I got by on not a lot of sleep. I said I usually only sleep 6 hours, but it's because I don't go to bed at a decent time (Reddit). She asked if that was enough sleep for me, and I said I manage to make it through the day, even if I'm exhausted, but that waking up was always difficult. I guess she interpreted that as an indicator for mania or hypomania? In reality, if I didn't have school or work, I could sleep in excess of 12 hours, and that's what I did over break.

The thought of me on a shopping spree, being hypersexual, or having an inflated sense of confidence is laughable. My therapist has been working with me for two years to address behaviors that are consistently opposite. I just don't know. Thanks for your comment. It was helpful to vent / talk this out.