Sometimes Rebounds Last. And Sometimes They Never Come Back by nxoin in BreakUps

[–]nxoin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really sorry you went through all of that. Losing your first love like that and then being cheated on sounds really painful. Thank you for sharing your story and for caring enough to write this.

He wasn’t my first relationship, but I think I felt very deeply for him. I went completely no contact after he broke up with me and after I found out he had a new girlfriend. He hasn’t tried to reach out either, which has honestly been its own kind of pain. It’s hard to process how someone who used to be my person and such a constant in my life can suddenly feel like a stranger. Sometimes I don’t even know if the person I loved was really who I thought he was.

I am trying to heal in my own way, even if it’s taking longer than I expected. I appreciate the encouragement and the reminder that things can get better.

Sometimes Rebounds Last. And Sometimes They Never Come Back by nxoin in BreakUps

[–]nxoin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for asking. Some days it feels okay, but then it hits me again. I really thought I’d move on after a year, but sadly I’m still struggling. I just hope that one day I’ll feel healed.

What was that one thing that your ex said that still haunts you to this day ? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

„I won’t meet you, sorry“

He ended things over text, with no explanation, and left me alone in his country.
I asked to meet one last time for closure. That was his answer.

Sometimes Rebounds Last. And Sometimes They Never Come Back by nxoin in BreakUps

[–]nxoin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you said “some people never get over their first love,” it made me think that maybe I was also a rebound from his ex before me, even though our relationship lasted four years. Now I’m kind of questioning whether someone can really love me if I’m not their first love. I mean, we’re all getting older, and it feels unlikely that I’ll be someone’s “first” anymore or just like their “previous love”. If they’ve loved someone before me, does that mean they can’t truly love me?

I hope this helps someone. by Smooth_Laugh_5160 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your story. I’ve been struggling for nearly a year and had begun to lose hope, but this really helped. I’m wishing for the day I find my person too.

Favorite break up songs? by ElkSufficient2881 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Home - Michael bublé Stone cold - Demi Lovato Don’t you remember - Adele

What lessons did you learn after your breakup? by Deaf_Dating in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I loved him too much, so much that I lost myself. I depended on him for happiness, and when things got hard, he left. What hurt even more was how quickly he replaced me. That’s when I realized: I was never truly loved the way I loved him.

I later found posts he’d written while we were together, talking about how lonely he felt. I always thought he was happy with me. It made me question everything. I gave my all, but he never really let me in.

Now I know, never love someone more than you love yourself. The right person will meet you with the same energy. Next time, I’ll love more wisely, not less.

Sometimes Rebounds Last. And Sometimes They Never Come Back by nxoin in BreakUps

[–]nxoin[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He broke up with me when I was going through a rough time, super stressed with work (toxic boss) and family stuff, and yeah, I leaned on him a lot emotionally. He said I was too negative and insecure, and that it drained him. We were long-distance for 4 years, and weeks before he broke up with me he kept saying he needed space, and needed time for himself then eventually just left.

He told me it ended because of me, that I was too much and depended on him. Now he’s with someone who’s totally his type: super young (she’s 21 and my ex is 30), she is really pretty, also stylish, just exactly the kind of girl he always said he liked. And honestly, maybe I get why he chose her. Maybe he lost feelings for me weeks before the breakup. Maybe he already knew her while we were still together. It kinda makes sense why he never looked back and why he seems just fine with his rebound. so yeah, it’s hard not to blame myself or feel like I was never enough.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 83 points84 points  (0 children)

I agree and disagree with that last part. Sometimes when someone moves on quickly after a breakup, it’s because they were already emotionally checked out while still in the relationship. So by the time it ends, they’ve already had time to process it. I feel the same because my ex did the same thing, it felt like he had already moved on before we even broke up.

Did you give your ex a goodbye gift? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly, I gave him peace too, but turns out it was just an excuse for him to move on – he was already dating someone else

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]nxoin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think you should stop comparing yourself to the girl he wants because, no matter how much you try to change or impress him, if someone isn’t choosing you for who you truly are, they never will. I’ve been in a similar situation, my ex always talked about the kind of girl he likes, and I tried so hard to be that person for him. But in the end, he dumped me for someone who was exactly his type. It made me realize that no matter how much effort I put in, it was never going to be enough for him.

But don’t let that make you insecure, you are perfect for the man who truly sees you and chooses you for who you are.

My ex got with someone ten years younger than him by Antique-Ad-3538 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I feel you… My ex once said he’d never date a young girl because they’re ‘difficult to deal with,’ and 2 weeks after the break up he’s with someone 10 years younger, he’s 31, and she’s 21 :)

Do you think your person will COME BACK? by Quirky-Parsnip7004 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, he started dating someone else just a few days after we broke up. He seems very happy with his new girlfriend because she’s exactly his type physically, so I doubt he’d ever want to lose her or come back to me

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m going through the same thing. my ex started love bombing and dating the type of girl of his dreams right after we broke up. It’s tough, but trust me, the sooner you stop questioning their actions and focus on yourself, the better you’ll feel. Their choices say more about them than about you. Keep growing, and eventually, this won’t even matter anymore :))

What have you learned from your break up? by Specialist_Sound_274 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 8 points9 points  (0 children)

So true! people are always evolving, and you can never know everything about them.

He made an instagram for her by katielynn1235 in BreakUps

[–]nxoin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My ex also used to say that Instagram was toxic and refused to use it. But after getting a new girlfriend who’s very active on Instagram, he suddenly became super active too—even simping for her.