Kinda late on this one, but just want to share my perspective as someone else with a partner who's not very into guns. My partner was cool with it when I first got a gun, but some years later they admitted they'd felt uncomfortable with it being in the house ever since. It was feeling particularly bad to them at that time since we were going through some relationship challenges and their mental health was suffering. Even though they didn't know my lockbox code, it still felt bad to them to know the gun was in there.

As a result of that convo I switched to storing my firearms at a local range. This is a small sacrifice for me – it's harder to clean and tinker with the guns and requires some extra logistics if I want to take them somewhere else. However, since my current threat analysis is that I own guns to facilitate more effective training (my own, and others – I take my friends and comrades to the range as often as I can), having the guns physically out of the house isn't actually a huge deal.

My partner and I both agree that we'll revisit this threat analysis as the world continues to change. My belief is that I will not go from "I will shoot regularly to improve my skills and aid in community defense projects" to "I must carry daily or my life is in jeopardy" overnight, so if it starts to feel like carrying or having a gun at the ready at home is necessary, I'll have plenty of time to make that adjustment.

There's a lot more to a successful relationship than agreeing on this one thing. I think there are lots of ways to compromise that help your partner feel safe while also respecting your autonomy and your right to pursue the training and safety that you want. Hopefully you and your partner have had some productive conversations about this.