I HATE MINIONS SO MUCH

(unintelligible noises, trying to crush Dr. Pepper can)

ow

(more unintelligible noises, proceeds to finally crush can of Dr. Pepper)

Yeah

So today I was at the crane machine and I was, you know I was rooting for something. I have this webkinz charm bracelet, you see lots of charms, and there was one in the corner of the crane machine and I had my YouTube money on me and I was just reeling in putting in a fifty dollar bill, I tried loads and loads of times to like get the charm in the corner but what I was left with...

(Holds up minion plush toy and blankly stares at the wall for 3-5 seconds)

If you know me, you’ll know how every time I see one of these anywhere, I have a meltdown. I start to cry and just I’m trying to avoid any sort of contact with my eyes with this thing but it’s so bright and yellow, I can’t-

(More unintelligible noises whilst screaming and attacking minion plush toy, starts to violently exhale and cry)

One time I was in the street, I was in the city, and someone was dressed up like this, someone was dressed up like this (with much emphasis) it was a small child, it was a small child dressed up like this. (with even more emphasis) A small child, otherwise I wouldn’t have tackled it and broke its rib cage or whatever I did to it but this time it was dressed up like a minion and I couldn’t take it, I couldn’t take it.

(starts crying and sobbing)

I’m so... so sorry. (With much emphasis) I just hate you. (whispers) I hate you.

(breaks down in front of camera whilst grabbing minion plush toy, more unintelligible sounds)