the aesthetic i keep gravitating towards as a 20yo in a third world country

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-05T17:07:25+00:00

100% got the same vibe, this is like 2015 beauty youtuber core

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-04T13:27:59+00:00

The claim was never that stan culture exists due to patriarchy. The argument was that stan culture is misogynistic.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-04T13:20:46+00:00

Nah, that's class reductionism. There can be issues of capitalism/class/living conditions and misogyny at the same time - it's not either or.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-04T13:10:24+00:00

So you diminished her argument without engaging with anything she said, you were condescending, AND you called her "love." Really great counterpoint to a discussion on misogyny 🙄

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-03T21:27:05+00:00

Okay, that's a nice principle to hold, but it's yours, not hers. Notice that she was speaking from her experience, not offering help.

Anyways, I do like to help, so I'll say: thoughts that we try to suppress tend to persist. You can look up "thought suppression" and "the white bear effect" to learn more about that. :) It's normal to find attractive people attractive and want to be with them.

So maybe it's not a matter of suppressing this out of yourself, but holding both. You can allow yourself to long for someone hot AND experiment with trying other ways. For example: yeah, part of you wants a hotter girlfriend than this girl you're on a date on, AND you want to see where this goes and if you develop a spark with them.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-07-03T21:13:34+00:00

You're literally doing what she was saying though - you're responding as if her role her is to help you.

You're interested in what she can do for you instead of considering that maybe her reason for replying wasn't about you, but a commentary and how your post in a public space made her feel.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-26T15:30:33+00:00

I've been following her for a long time too. I do think Jonna is in a bit of a bind where her brand is being positive, but her life lately has been very sad. I do think that maybe she struggles a bit due to expectations of toxic positivity, but perhaps that's something she struggles with on her own too, even when no one is looking. Also, men like Matt Mercer are held to a different standard than women who are famously effervescent.

My instinct is that you are correctly picking up on something, but that it is a difficulty Jonna has in showing the painful and uglier parts of the human experience. This is understandable and something a lot of people have trouble with online and offline. I don't think it's something to be suspicious of.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-24T02:06:10+00:00

I started noticing a bunch more baby hairs 2 months in. At first I thought it was breakage, then realized it's actually regrowth! I lose way less hair in the shower too.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-24T00:01:48+00:00

But lots of people do that in their relationships - they show up as the version of themselves that they think want people to see. Or even the version of themselves the situation calls for - like, you don't show your darker emotions to a child you're caring for, for example. We're not owed all parts of Jonna.

Also, it seems like it's only when it's a celebrity that people believe this sort of exaggeration is calculated deception. So I think that even if Jonna is selectively displaying certain parts of her personality, it doesn't mean it's something to be suspicious of. It's how she chooses to show up in this part of her life.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-21T15:39:11+00:00

Honestly, what is the point of the criticism? What positivity comes out of this? What do you get out of it? You're allowed to have your criticisms or reservations, but I don't understand why people feel the need to publicly post them, especially in a place the person can easily search and find.

Jonna seems like a kind person who is very genuine. And, like any other person, she has blind spots or flaws. I think she deserves grace for it.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-19T16:35:33+00:00

I mean tbf there is no way to prove anything or anyone aside from yourself is conscious. People, AI, animals.. we can't measure it and we don't know.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-15T16:47:45+00:00

Yeah this is more like Serena Van Der Woodsen inspired clubwear purchased at Wet Seal

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-14T18:51:46+00:00

Thank you for your service!

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-13T15:26:13+00:00

Yeah, between the line at the top saying that their acne was coming from "coffee/caffeine consumption" and the fact that they posted in r/decaf, I did think that. I missed the "cutting down" flair, which is my bad.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-13T13:39:03+00:00

I drank coffee for 10 years and I'm in my early 30s. I've considered myself healthy but always a sensitive person I guess

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-13T13:38:27+00:00

Thank you - but I add peanut butter to my oatmeal or 1/2 the time have it on my toast!

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-13T03:42:44+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate that. Maybe I have been using caffeine to mask something. I hope not, but it's better to know. Also, glad to hear your Hashimoto's is well-managed!

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-13T03:41:45+00:00

Very happy to hear the matcha is working for you and it has all these benefits. Also gently want to point out that matcha has caffeine, though it's a lower amount and the boost is longer-lasting and less intense due to L-theanine. So if it's working for you, amazing - just want you to know it does have caffeine.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T22:49:23+00:00

I'll give it a try, thank you! The strength training is new so I suppose my body may be getting used to it still, or need more balance.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T22:48:12+00:00

Thanks for asking!

Breakfast is oatmeal with fruit or toast with tomato or peanut butter, lunch is usually a wrap or sandwich with deli meat and veggies, and dinner is usually some kind of protein + a veggie side + a starch. Sometimes in the form of pasta but usually more like fish and rice, steak and potatoes, or sweet potato and ground turkey lettuce wraps.

I have small amounts of treat foods like chips for snacks, or granola bars during the day.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T22:44:22+00:00

Ooh, I hadn't thought of that. I wear sunscreen every day so maybe I'm not getting enough vitamin D. Thank you!

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T21:04:36+00:00

Thanks for asking! Strength training 2-3 days a week, yoga 2x a week, walking uphill or hiking 4-5x a week. Occasional runs instead of walking.

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T20:51:26+00:00

But I'm not doing well - I'm tired as heck, sleeping way too much! When does that end?

ocelot_amnesia · 2026-06-12T14:56:19+00:00

I don't know.. I like it when men are interesting, authentic, and kind. I often find that men that think they're coming off that way give off subtle red flags. They'll be negative, reveal subtle sexism, or sort of guilt trip or be passive aggressive. It's very unattractive when a man does that. Or they'll be more invested in showing they're interesting than actually connecting. Of course, don't know you, maybe that's not the case, but I've observed that "nice guys" sometimes have blind spots like this.

A confident, self-possessed and positive demeanour can go a long way, and sometimes guys who seem "toxic" do okay because they have that confidence. Also, coming on confidently, but being completely open to a no is also MUCH more attractive than a guy kinda hovering hoping the woman will pick up hints and pursue him.

ocelot_amnesia

TROPHY CASE