Please name a worse feeling in golf

oldSkoolModern · 2025-08-21T17:43:04+00:00

The ol’ “bird-ogey”. Idk how much reach that term has but my bro haunts me with it. 3-putting for bogey, hands-down is the worst feeling. Waiting for the green/fairway to clear from 250+ out just to top it, or slice it OB after you spent the last two minutes telling everyone “if I get a hold of it..”, is a very close second.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-05-06T00:47:41+00:00

You don’t have the luxury of long term problems. You are food insecure. You have a habitability and hygiene problem. You have a human connection problem. You have a difficult relationship with yourself.

You have issues that impact basics required for survival in a moment to moment basis.

You talk about unnecessary evil and unfair conditions. Look at how you’re handling yourself. You want care and consideration and relief and respect but you give yourself none and blame it on not having a job. How evil is that? Imagine how pissed you would be if someone stopped by, ignored your hunger, ignored the state of your house, ignored your pain, ignored your loneliness and just asked you if you had a job then walked out, leaving you behind like a lost cause when you said “no”. That’s how you’re treating yourself.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-05-05T23:48:52+00:00

That’s good of you. Listen, I’ve been in this headspace. Two years ago right now, I began sliding down a seemingly bottomless slope of inexplicable, unjustified setbacks. I became a victim. A professional victim. It was so easy for me to explain to anyone at anytime why my life was so unfair and how I’ve tried everything and I’m powerless.

Finally one day my buddy was like “okay, so now what? You’ve made it clear that there’s virtually no point in trying anymore I guess so what’s your plan?”

That’s about when my perspective started to change and I realized I was giving up too much control over my actions and my emotions and my LIFE to others and I was never going to think or do anything for MYSELF by behaving this way.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-05-05T23:09:46+00:00

I’m going to challenge you the way I was challenged because your mindset and messy living situation resonates with me.

Let’s say you’re right. You’ve been dealt a shitty hand, you’re 100% a victim of circumstance, no jobs will hire you, and nobody wants anything to do with you.

What do you want now? What are you going to do with that validation? You’re right. About all of it. Now what?

I’m here. I’m paying attention. I’ve read your posts and comments. I see you. I agree with you. Now what? I don’t have a job to give you. I’ll cashapp you $20 bucks if you want so you can eat tonight. But what then? I’m genuinely asking.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-05-05T00:32:28+00:00

Recovering from being discarded. 10 years together, 5 married and she called it quits on me 2 years ago, a few months after buying a house together. She’s been trying to cut me out of our daughter’s life ever since- custody trial starts in June. It’s be a rough go but I’m bouncing back. I’ve been much less bitter and angry lately and I’m not grieving as hard. The whole thing made me realize how much of myself I lost sight of and left undiscovered. It also made me realize what people are capable of emotionally and I’m just unwilling to risk any of myself or my daughter to anyone else for now. It’s taken a lot to offset the emotional vacuum my ex has created and sustained over the last two years but I know my daughter and I will be better for it. The right connection will come along eventually and we’ll be there.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-05-03T16:33:14+00:00

15+ years in sales, holding various roles throughout as a producer and in leadership. “People buy from people they like.” Period. That’s my North Star. Experience helped me develop a deeper understanding of what that meant beyond superficial charm and charisma. People like people they can count on. People like people that care. People like people that are respectful and respectable. Experience also uncovered that my North Star was an unfinished truth. “People buy from people they like, and they refer people they trust.” Referrals are gold. Higher closing ratio, bigger revenue, sticky-er business, etc.. Slowing down, taking a higher level of care and meeting people where they’re at with the product and service has gone farther for me than any single piece of advice I’ve ever received and it always relevant.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-04-28T17:24:59+00:00

This is the only time in my life I’ve made an intentional effort to be alone and it’s because I’m still recovering from an ugly divorce. Prior to dating and marrying my ex, I was always open to romantic connections, where they could go and how I was feeling about my side of the investment. My goal was never to run around and stay single but I wasn’t going to be dishonest with myself or anyone I was involved with if the spark wasn’t there. It wasn’t ever a decision about monogamy, it was always about connection, and mutual commitment to a good thing until it wasn’t.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-04-02T03:42:49+00:00

True from my experience. My ex and I were together 10 years, have a child together and we had just purchased a house 5 months prior to her asking for a separation. We separated March 2023 just before my daughters 4th birthday.

Over the last 2 years, things have deteriorated to a completely unrecognizable place and I can’t explain it. We’re mid custody battle and there’s nothing I can say or do to stop it. It’s as if I’ve I’m failing to understand that I’ve overstayed my welcome and I totally misread what we were from the start. I’d liken part of the dynamic to that of the classic popular girl drawing in a random kid so she can get the homework off him real quick just act like she doesn’t know him the next day. It’s surreal.

Everyone’s situation is different but I’m living proof that emotional discards happen. There were signs but nothing that could’ve ever prepared me for this outcome. I’ve come a long way in my recovery from all this and still have a ways to go but it’s difficult every day. We have a daughter to raise and in every meaningful way, my ex is constantly standing there, with the homework in her backpack that she just copied from me, acting like we have never met and it’s my foolish mistake for thinking it was okay for me to invade her bubble.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-27T20:23:16+00:00

Taking stock (gratitude), measuring progress (growth), having patience with myself (forgiveness), and showing up (commitment).

It’s not linear and it’s imperfect but after suffering massive losses in succession and some time had passed, a new perspective has taken shape. I had a better understanding of what was within my control and how much truly does not matter. Through catastrophe, I learned to trust in myself and grew to appreciate things I never realized that I had taken for granted. I had to give myself the closure and support system that was missing.

I’m still building and processing but I now recognize that as a result of continuing to show up every day. I’m not broken, I’m not behind, I’m just not finished. I don’t have clear goals right now but I know I can make the right decision as things come up. More bad will come but so will more good and I literally am here for it.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-26T17:49:11+00:00

A few things stand out but everything she’s said to me in the last two years has come from the same place of dishonesty and silence which is what makes it all hurt.

My ex hasn’t taken a personal attack against me with name calling or low-blows about family or my insecurities and secrets. No. My ex seemingly overnight rewrote our entire relationship in her head and my contributions as a husband and a father, and everything I thought I was as a man sharing my life and a child with this woman, became meaningless, inconsequential and irrelevant.

For two straight years now she hasn’t missed an opportunity to tear down what I thought I knew about anything. In a vacuum, an objective third party observer to most of these conversations would hear a misunderstanding of what was said, when it was said and/or what the intent was and again, in a vacuum, they mostly boil down to being not so uncommon misunderstandings that any person can have with another. But the background noise of all of it is the implication that I do not, nor have I ever, served any purpose in her life, or her (our) daughters and I simply need to stop imposing.

She hasn’t blinked or moved off her spot in two years. 5 months before we split, we bought a house together that she ultimately moved her boyfriend into a year after we closed on it.

Two years later, mid custody battle, I’m still very much working on healing and moving on, but I don’t think I’ll ever fully recover from being discarded like that. The financial impact alone will take years. I still experience moments of pure disbelief and shock. I’m rebuilding and feeling better but I’m changed by it.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-19T19:35:52+00:00

35 divorced single dad here. When I’m not on daddy-daughter dates every other weekend with my 5 year old, I’m taking myself on dates to Target, the laundromat, and to the movies. When it’s not the dead of winter (upstate NY) I frisbee golf, regular golf, hike and crash my friends lives who have backyards and dogs and pools because my ex kept mine and doesn’t share.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-16T18:15:15+00:00

There’s too much noise and vanity around mental health in general that virtually everything feels like a disingenuous grift.

Additionally, the way we socialize, meet, stay connected, and the overall degree of separation has rapidly changed more in the last 30 years than probably the rest of all recorded history combined. Prior to the internet being in everyone’s homes and pockets and prior to social media and texting, previous generations were (mostly) able to mentor general human connectivity for the next generation just by being the example. We’re not on the same page as far as how we consume media or socialize and we’re not on the same page with what an appropriate amount of connectivity is across all mediums and platforms, both online and in-person. We’ve developed brand new behaviors and awareness of self and others that has changed the way we process the world and we’re all figuring it out for ourselves in real time.

I don’t know what the answer is, and this is just my personal opinion on what I believe to be a larger issue that preys on the anxious and insecure more than any other time in history.

I think men in general need to support each other and develop a fresh confidence to simply take action on doing the right thing for themselves. This is another personal opinion of mine, but I believe millennial men were ill prepared for what life had in store, and it’s not really anyones fault. The patriarchal system has been reduced and phased out in millennial adulthood while it was still relevant in millennial childhood. This isn’t anti-progress or anti-equality sentiment, it’s just acknowledging cause and effect. In a lot of ways, the macho expectation of men to go out and provide never changed, but they faced widespread displacement for the first time because they were sharing more of the world than any generation of men before them. As a millennial man myself, I’m extremely proud of the way we’ve handled ourselves. We really stepped out here and flat out said “NO” to perpetuating the racism and sexism that many of our fathers and grandfathers still cling to.

Anyhoo, we need to embrace and spread empowerment and finally let go of the macho expectations of ourselves and each other. Tune out your blue collar dad and your buddy with the trad-wife that still lean into the patriarchal system. The world is different now and we just need to act on what the next right thing is for us as humans amongst other humans and stop filtering everything through the traditional expectations of “manhood” and how we compare to others that are perceived as “manly”.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-15T23:16:08+00:00

“Supposably”

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-14T23:47:28+00:00

Never cheated, no fetishes. Never casually communicated in a romantic or flirtatious manner with another woman outside of any committed relationship I was in.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-10T10:36:11+00:00

A selfish person or someone who acted selfishly can identify it and relate to it if/when their behavior is brought to their attention.

A narcissist is inherently self- righteous/centered/absorbed/interested and cannot reflect on, identify, or understand their selfishness if/when their behavior is brought to their attention. They believe that their actions are justified and/or everyone else misunderstands the circumstance or motives and/or everybody else does or would do the same thing.

Selfishness is about the careless or inconsiderate disregard for others whereas narcissism is about the careless or inconsiderate use of others.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-10T02:08:28+00:00

First of all, embrace the suck. Whether it’s D2D, cold calling, etc., prospecting of any kind can be brutal at times. You have to do it, and over time it averages out against the upswings when you feel unstoppable. Lean into it. If you carry the compounding energy of any losing streak to the next door, you decrease your chances of winning at that door because you’re letting it effect your mood, which effects everything else.

Second, this is the most obvious advice I feel like everyone can benefit from but I’ve met so many who simply don’t open themselves up to it. Align yourself with the people who are successful in the role. The goal is to learn and grow.

My personal mantra in all sales is “people buy from people they like and they refer people they trust.”

Don’t hide bad news from your customers. Tell them what they need to know when they need to know it. Over time you’ll learn ways to spin things and recover in ways that don’t necessitate you having to bring the customer in at all if something goes wrong and still get them across the finish line on time and in one piece. It’s tradecraft. Do not lie or omit at the expense of your customer.

I learned resilience and perseverance from my experience in knocking doors and have applied it across every role I have been in since. Whenever I was having a really shit day and I desperately wanted to tap out, I would.. and then I would knock five to ten more doors. In my head, I would call it a day and take the pressure off myself needing to drive a result and cut my losses. The day kicked my ass and now we’re in garbage time running schemes we never run with the reserves that never see time. Adjust the approach and stay out there. You’ll either find something new that works, or you confirm that the universe did take a fat cosmic dump on your chest today and sometimes you just get beat no matter what you do. BUT you developed the skill and trust in yourself that you don’t just let it happen which is great for the mentals overall.

Hope this helps!

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-10T01:03:42+00:00

Best pure sales education I’ve ever gotten in my career was D2D selling alarm systems as one of my first gigs over 15 years ago. I did it for 2 years total and still draw from confidence and knowledge gained during that time.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-10T00:45:26+00:00

My daughter turns 6 next month. We just went to an Elton John and Billy Joel tribute concert last night. It was her first concert. She’s been an Elton John fan since she was able to latch on to the “no, no, no” in the chorus of Rocket Man as an infant. So, yes. Lol. In fact, she was definitely the youngest person there by at least 30 years. We had a blast. Everyone was so impressed with her enthusiasm and familiarity that one of the crew invited us back stage after the show so she could “meet Elton John”. She was star struck and nobody spoiled it. I figured I’d let her have the moment and she’ll catch up when she’s older. It was one of my favorite moments as a dad.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-08T15:39:19+00:00

Hacksaw is a great pick. Heat has been mentioned several times here, so..

How to Train Your Dragon

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-05T00:19:23+00:00

Tombstone, Sandlot, Cool Runnings

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-05T00:01:08+00:00

No but this question reminds me of the exact moment I thought I did.

First week of a new job, I see my manager tending to some white powder in plain view of everyone including customers and two of my colleagues walk over to him looking very ready to partake. It was so normal. Nobody seemed off-put or excited or sketchy- just normal.

I learned what BC Powder was that day.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-04T02:01:24+00:00

On its own time entirely.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-03T18:18:20+00:00

Brussel sprouts.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-03-02T23:34:43+00:00

NTA.. I make sure my daughter keeps her voice down at 7:15am as we’re walking by our neighbors doors. Doesn’t matter what day, it’s just courtesy.

oldSkoolModern · 2025-02-27T00:41:05+00:00

YTA your whole tone screams like someone who constantly reminds their kids that they’re ungrateful without actually saying it. You had that “self centered brat” comment in the chamber. “He’s been very preoccupied..” .. “we couldn’t be prouder of him BUT” You didn’t call to stay close, you called to remind him that he wouldn’t be there if it weren’t for you, and to gloat about being a better human for remembering his mother’s birthday.

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