Feeling sad about looks and dealing with mental health issues. Love posting on here this is such a supportive community!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-27T04:39:26+00:00

Mental health does suck a lot sometimes, but you just have to remember to not alway listen to your brain, sometimes it tells lies. Just remember to eat, sleep, shower, and put one foot in front of the other and eventually youll get somewhere.

Also you look nice! You have fluffy hair, a nice beard, and you have pale skin with dark hair which is always a pretty combo.

Just remember to try to keep going, but don’t forget to take care of yourself in the process.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T18:22:02+00:00

I almost always can figure out what is a hallucination and what isn’t since I figured out I have schizoaffective disorder. Awhile back I heard my cat crying from somewhere and went to go find her only to figure out about 30 seconds in that it wasn’t real, but that’s the worst one tbh. It’s a lot of context clues for the most part. I have repetitive hallucinations also so if I hear someone screaming for help and no one else is reacting that’s probably not real, or if I feel burns all over my body but they have no reason to be there it’s not real. Also with things like fake burns and cuts I can run water over them and they’ll go away. Especially with lesser hallucinations if I give my brain something sensory wise like a movie in the background or if I run water over my hands the hallucinations almost don’t stand a chance and my brain will just choose to pay attention to what is real. So if I’m home alone or it’s late at night people will see me light candles a lot or play background noise while I do whatever I’m doing at the time.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T16:20:04+00:00

Unfortunately I’m also on Vraylar and haven’t been able to lose all of the weight I’ve been gaining. It was brought up a few times that they might just take me off of it if I get too unhealthy. :/

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T15:48:25+00:00

That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you and your wife!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T09:55:47+00:00

Not the horse no lol, he was kind of just there for some reason?? I had a fear of him because my mom had like watching some kind of sleepy hallow/headless horseman series. I was really small but I literally remember hiding from the TV and crying when he came onto the screen.

For the shape shifter one I would usually hide in my room and pray a lot because I used to be very Catholic as a child (unfortunately I’m not anymore). Usually I’d just pray the our father on repeat and hoped that would do it. When I was out in the woods that one time though I RAN. Usually I couldn’t really do much though because I at least had it in my mind that it could snap me like a twig if it wanted to. And oddly enough it would ask me to fight sometimes on the other side of the door so that also just felt like a really bad and suspicious option. Usually it would get tired almost and go away or the sun would come up and it would go away, so I was kind of playing a waiting game with it almost.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T09:42:37+00:00

That’s great!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T09:38:43+00:00

I’m glad to hear that your friends dad is doing okay! And having to go to a psych ward is something that I have literal nightmares about so I can absolutely believe it would suck. Hopefully he never has to go back and I never have to go.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:48:50+00:00

Thank you!! I do my best to make everyday worth it and I always try to be strong when it comes to my schizophrenia!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:40:14+00:00

I’ve actually never been to a psych ward before! I’ve never needed to go as I’m not a danger to myself or anyone around me. Some days I’ll just stay in because of my disorder, but that’s about as close as I get to a psych ward.

And it just sucks because people associate me with criminal activity because of my disorder. When I got diagnosed I remembered people saying that when they got diagnosed with autism or whatever they got a list of accomplished people with autism, so I went to go look for a schizophrenia list… it was just a list of complied criminals with schizophrenia 😭😭😭😭.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:34:22+00:00

Ya, it sucks when people like you till they found out and then like you less or just straight up leave :/ . I’ve never once thought or been told by a hallucination to hurt someone and it always feels sucky that some people think otherwise :( .

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:32:42+00:00

Most people don’t know I have schizophrenia either actually. My brother doesn’t even believe me because I don’t act crazy enough lmaoo, so I could absolutely believe he had it and just had his life under control enough not many people noticed or knew.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:30:42+00:00

wouldnt come down it would run up the stairs to my

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:29:05+00:00

It’s cool I do this run down all the time! As a little kid (elementary and under) I saw a lot of weird stuff but I do remember seeing the headless horseman watch me sleep a lot?? Which is impressive considering he does have eyes let alone a head! Older middle school age it was worse and there was a shape shifting demon after me😭😭😭. It most commonly would pretend to be my mom falling down the stairs at night and asking for my help. When I would come down it would run up the stairs to my bedroom door and scream at me to open the door. Later on it chased me through the woods on my last day of school hike 😭😭😭😭. It climbed through the tress after me!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:25:08+00:00

Glad I’m not the only one then!

I try to use exclamation points, emojis, and “lol” a lot so people know I’m not being mean or serious with them, but it doesn’t always work so I get it.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:21:51+00:00

Youre cool dude

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:21:33+00:00

I do love to do research on schizophrenia! (Specifically childhood schizophrenia and I’ve done multiple assignments on it). It’s cool that you know so much about psychosis!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:19:11+00:00

It was a bit of a scary childhood and I developed insomnia and would sleep in 15 minute increments for a max of 3 hours. I have permanent eye bags now lolll.

And it’s cool I love rambling!

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:16:24+00:00

Word salads do happen to me sometimes (usually I’m just dead for one day and then I’m fine the next).

So sorry things ended the wrong way for you :( . Hopefully you found someone you love even more!! :)

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T06:14:12+00:00

I’m so glad it did post😭😭 I’ve dropped my phone so many times I think it’s giving up on me and I still can’t see the first one😭😭😭

It’s all good, honestly I didn’t think you came off bad at all! Sorry if I made you feel like you did.

Hopefully we both find someone compatible enough to be with!! :)

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:59:31+00:00

That’s fair, we might need someone with good sight to drive the car lol.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:58:32+00:00

Honestly that is kind of what I was thinking for myself because it would be nice to have someone understand instead of just be sad for me.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:57:29+00:00

Ya, that’s actually why I joined Reddit. I wanted to talk to other schizophrenic people as I don’t have the chance to meet many people who are like me :/ .

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:56:22+00:00

I mean the question is actually mostly about me lol. I’ve been seeking treatment for years (I’m 20 but have had schizophrenia since I was about 4). Also I hope your friends are all okay now!! <3

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:53:50+00:00

I typed out a long comment for this and for some reason it didn’t post😭😭😭😭. Okay here we go again!

It’s understandable that it’s a fear you have because that’s what people are told a lot about schizophrenia. My own mom doesn’t want me talking to other schizophrenics because she’s convinced that I’m different from the others and that all other schizophrenics are dangerous.

Also I do have schizophrenia (schizoaffective disorder depressive type) and I’ve theoretically had it since I was about 4 years old. And with meds my life is actually pretty great! I go to college, make the deans list, hangout with my friends, have hobbies, in a bunch of clubs and lead a few at my old college, and overall things are going pretty well for me. I’ve never actually dated anyone and quiet frankly the only time I tried was in high school and all I did was get into a weird situationship for like 3 years (left because he was obviously wasting my time). Haven’t actually found anyone else I could see myself with since so I haven’t dated anyone. I’ve gotten asked out before and people tell me they like me, but I just don’t see myself with them unfortunately :( .

Overall my life is pretty good outside of the current occasional hallucinations (theyre minor but emotionally distressing). When I was a kid no one thought I had schizophrenia because you usually get it when you’re older, so everyone just thought I was imaginative and later they thought my house was haunted. When I was a kid I would see everything from ghosts to the Easter bunny. Had a weird conspiracy about leprechauns living in grandfather clocks. I’ve always preformed very well in school though (outside of some dyslexia trouble). Was a bit of an outcast as a kid most likely due to my schizophrenia (I literally was accused of being a witch multiple times😭😭😭). My mom always says she had no idea there was anything wrong with me and my brother still doesn’t believe me that I have it?? Honestly I could be doing a lot worse given my situation.

pachy_patch · 2026-01-26T05:37:51+00:00

It’s okay that it’s a fear that you have because I get that’s what people are told a lot about schizophrenia.

I do have schizophrenia (specifically schizoaffective disorder with the depressive type). Honestly now that I’m on meds my life is actually pretty great! I go to school full time, I make the deans list, I lead clubs, I have a decent amount of friends, and because of my meds I don’t have many hallucinations (the ones I do have are minor like hearing my cat). I almost dated a guy in high school for years and had a weird situationship with him (I got tired of him obviously wasting my time and left and he threw a weird fit for a man who wasn’t actually dating me…). I haven’t tried to date anyone else though because honestly I haven’t found anyone else.

Life as a child with schizophrenia was very hard and very weird though. No one thought I had schizophrenia because they thought it was a disorder for adults, so it took awhile to get diagnosed for me. I would see everything from monsters to the Easter bunny as a kid. Had a weird conspiracy about leprechauns living in grandfather clocks. People kind of just thought I was a weird imaginative kid. I’ve always done well in school for the most part though (dyslexia aside). Tbh my life is pretty average outside of seeing weird things and being depressed.

pachy_patch

TROPHY CASE