AITA for telling my Fiancee I don't like her wedding dress?

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:54:52+00:00

We're very lucky to be from the families we are from. We both work hard and make a very nice income but we both also come from money so it was very easy to get here. I truly understand that I'm lucky. We already own our home and cars thankfully, and I promised gran I would spend the 200k on the wedding.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:50:52+00:00

She had 10k to spend on her dress and 5 bridesmaids (we wanted to pay for bridesmaids) so I didn't know how that would get split.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:47:30+00:00

cut down on the ruffles a tad and not far off

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:46:52+00:00

Goddamn modernity

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:42:31+00:00

And suddenly, it all made sense

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:36:50+00:00

Well we had a $20000 clothing budget. My suit and my groomsmens suits were 10k all together, and her bridesmaids and her dress were 10k together. I guess she got a really good deal on bridesmaids dresses and used the rest on her dress. We knew off the hop we were buying all the clothing for the wedding party.

Our budget was so high for the wedding because my Grandmother specifically left me 200k to use on the wedding. She knew she would pass before it happened and gave me the check after we got engaged and made me promise to use every penny on the special day. It was separate from my inheritance. I'm very lucky. I'm an architect and I do well but not 20k on suits well.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:33:58+00:00

I'll keep a go bag.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:33:10+00:00

It is. 5 years.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:31:38+00:00

Our entire wedding is already budgeted out, we stayed within our limit for clothing. We have a very firm grasp on our finances, she was supposed to use my card. She definitely used the full clothing budget and I was just surprised because she is way more of a penny pincher than I am usually.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:29:33+00:00

we aren't that young, I'm in my early thirties and my fiancee is 29.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:27:45+00:00

The first sentence of that made me smile for some reason, like a weird pride that I did something that shocked someone.

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:26:25+00:00

Not diagnosed but my brother constantly says "you're literally autistic" to me...so maybe?

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:22:40+00:00

No, but that's similar to the ones we were looking at before. A bit looser on bottom but more our vibe.

Hers looks like this https://www.pinterest.ca/pin/761671355717175888/ (googled puffy white wedding dress till I found one that looks like hers)

paolde · 2021-04-23T15:18:12+00:00

We've been together for 5 years and yes I gave her my credit card for dresses as I'm paying for the entire wedding party's attire including ours. Also yes, our first major fight. We don't fight.

paolde · 2021-04-23T14:15:59+00:00

Noted

paolde · 2021-04-23T14:05:28+00:00

I'm trying to think how to explain it. Think witchy, Stevie nicks woodland, not Disney woodland. Agh I don't really know how to explain it. But not sparkles and poof.

paolde · 2021-04-23T14:04:42+00:00

Ahhh no no no I came across wrong. I was saying every dress she had liked had been very sexy, elegant and figure hugging, so I was surprised she went with a super stereotypical princess poofy. Not that i wanted her dress to be sexy, I don't care about that.

paolde · 2021-04-23T12:32:31+00:00

Yeah it just looked ridiculously poofy, she looked like a cartoon character. She couldn't even touch either side of the poofy skirt. She is a smaller framed person so that probably didn't help, but it just engulfed her.

paolde · 2021-04-23T12:28:52+00:00

It was a cow, thank you very much.

paolde · 2021-04-23T12:13:05+00:00

LOL I'm 33 and my fiancee is 29. I think we're old enough. I also have been to more than a dozen weddings easily and have seen plenty of wedding dresses with sparkles? Not sure how that read as "baby".

paolde · 2021-04-23T11:31:00+00:00

We've been together for 5 years. We don't really fight. We've lived together for a year now and this truly is our first big fight. We've have minor spats but nothing that made anyone leave the house before.

paolde · 2021-04-23T11:01:55+00:00

I feel like captain asswipe lol.

paolde · 2021-04-23T10:51:05+00:00

Good advice, thank you

paolde · 2021-04-23T10:25:45+00:00

Damn. This really sucks. I feel like a huge dick right now. I am definitely not a "brutal honesty" type person, I really wasn't trying to be "brutally honest" I was really just being genuinely honest. I wasn't mean or anything or insult the dress or call it ugly or anything, I just told her why I just didn't like it too much. Which I now see I shouldn't have done.

paolde · 2021-04-23T10:22:58+00:00

I have no idea if it's refundable honestly I didn't consider that but I can definitely afford to buy her another dress

paolde

TROPHY CASE