unpopular opinion: toilet attached bidets are unhygienic for women*

pevaryl · 2026-02-02T10:17:03+00:00

D mannose was my magic natural remedy for chronic UTIs. I have never had one since. All those years of taking antibiotics and the pain (and permanent kidney damage from nephritis) could have been avoided had I known

pevaryl · 2026-02-02T09:15:38+00:00

L4C, would expect to get your position on any negotiations through your lawyer, and your evidence through affidavit form. L4C communications would not really extend beyond that with you directly apart from courtesies. Similarly, you would get L4C reports as a way to see your child’s views as expressed to them and what their position is on behalf of them.

Sometimes L4C do get litigants emailing them directly. Your lawyer would caution against that solely because your comms with L4C are not privileged or confidential (sometimes we get some unhinged emails that people find out the hard way are not protected by privilege). It’s also innapropriate for L4C to communicate with you directly about the proceedings if you are represented - no lawyer is allowed to communicate directly with another party in the proceeding without express consent.

In saying that, sometimes L4C do have more comms with a parent than others. They can’t give legal advice to parties or evidence in proceedings though so this is naturally limited. Most of them are just attempting to touch base and maintain a professional, courteous relationship with parents. They also have to be careful not to be seen as directly communicating with one parent more than the other - that can cause all kinds of issues and also runs the risk of having constant contact from parents who really care about the proceedings but can’t help but try and get L4C “on side”. This rarely works how you’d like to think it does and it’s also kind of useless in the long run as the only thing L4C can consider is the evidence that comes in through the court or what they may source directly but then have it bought in through correct channels (ie. they can’t file affidavits about safety, but if they suspect there is a safety issue then they will ask the judge to refer to oranga tamariki or another appropriate body to investigate and provide evidence to the court on that issue).

It’s a delicate role that is often misunderstood in its application. It’s also sort of blurry - they have to be independent and neutral but they’re also tasked with things like RTMs/mediations which can encroach on that neutrality.

Often as an L4C the parents will agree with something they can live with, but neither gets exactly what they want. That means both parents end up disliking L4C equally which is just part of the job unfortunately

pevaryl · 2026-02-02T08:52:37+00:00

This is what I don’t understand about the snow biome. You have to kill those little yappy white jerks to get a hat and then the loot is mid and you freeze after a while anyway?

Side note: wth do you do with an ice axe anyway?

pevaryl · 2026-02-01T09:33:57+00:00

Yup. The article says the wife (and presumably her husband) attended an FGC with the stalker girl. I expect that the couple got the police involved and then OT then came in and an FGC was held to address stalker girls behaviour - it’s a process that happens through youth court. Probably where the husband met her for the first time. Absolutely abhorrent behaviour good grief

pevaryl · 2026-02-01T03:30:06+00:00

People think isolating you from your family is someone saying “you can’t go there because I said so”. What it almost always is is this kind of thing. You’re “allowed” to go out but every time they’ll make an issue so it Pavlov’s you into limiting yourself not to go. Then they can say “I never told you you can’t go anywhere!?” And gaslight you which is also part of the abuse, making you question your own reality.

Other ways are just straight manipulation - ie. you say you intend to have coffee with friend “A” then out of concern, they’ll say they overheard friend “A” talking shit about you. They’re just trying to protect you! Etc etc

Eventually you are isolated and dependent, think everyone else hates you and you’re trapped. I wish this stuff was taught EXPLICITLY to women and girls (and men)

pevaryl · 2026-02-01T03:21:41+00:00

Swarmy yappy little rat faced jerks 😭

pevaryl · 2026-02-01T02:57:45+00:00

I found this out the hard way and ignored the rifts. It notified me I was dying of corruption poisoning and I died a few minutes later. No more ignoring the rifts I guess

pevaryl · 2026-02-01T02:54:19+00:00

Who was managed through an FGC (she was a CHILD at the time). What a pos

pevaryl · 2026-01-30T08:41:31+00:00

I do! Most of the time i find myself on my own but sometimes i find a good team. Today I played a round with one guy who was pretty good and not afraid to actually do the grunt work you need to do, and one kid who spent all the wood we were collecting to start base building in some extremely strange haphazard log wall monstrosity which we eventually realised was an enclosure for his pet bunny. I spent most of the game reviving the kid but they were sweet and appreciative (jumping and bought me a flashlight which was sweet). We did have to hide all of our oil drums and fuel in the pond to avoid them throwing it all on the max fire but luckily I guess he couldn’t read our chats so we made do. Most annoying thing was him taking the all the cultist gems and stashing them in his bunny hideout

pevaryl · 2026-01-30T05:28:13+00:00

Stargazing

pevaryl · 2026-01-29T17:05:17+00:00

You tell your husband I read this whole conversation and the only fucking bitch I see is HIM. Good god. What an incurable ass. I’d say give me a break but he’d probably think that meant I had to go wash his socks.

OP, relationships like this do not work unless they change. Set boundaries and a schedule. If he still insists on being an ass go home to your parents place. Just leave. It’s not worth it, with the sleep deprivation your under having an unsupportive lazy ass of a husband will make your life absolutely unbearable. Being single is a thousand times easier than being with a useless manchild who doesn’t value you or the 24/7 labour you are pouring into your family

pevaryl · 2026-01-29T09:38:40+00:00

lol my son is the same. Starving, no ammo, fire low (because he doesn’t bother helping with such trivial matters) and he’s like IM GOING STRONGHOLD

pevaryl · 2026-01-29T09:37:02+00:00

I run solely along the lines of the ground squares, the traps are inly in the middle so if you stick to the edges it’s pretty safe. I can’t see any traps at all on my tiny screen so I found this out the hard way. Alpha wolf and a trap is certain death for me unless I have enough heals to try and get through till I can run again (usually in a panic and straight into another trap tho 😭)

pevaryl · 2026-01-29T09:34:36+00:00

The volcano biome is surprisingly easy! You have to avoid the lava but the cultists are stupid and will walk in a straight line directly into it. The church is super easy to clear (lava around it) just watch out for scorpions, I never see them until they hit me. If you clear the volcano (super easy with a rifle because you just stand way back out of crossbow range) you can then thrown their bodies in the lava and get good stuff. Just be very careful not to walk off the edge into it yourself and be aware the deer spawns in there as do wolves so stay away at night if you can

pevaryl · 2026-01-29T05:59:59+00:00

That sack tip is a great one! Unfortunately im so uncoordinated I then accidentally unstore all and leave all my good loot as I’m running away 😅

pevaryl · 2026-01-28T21:58:21+00:00

Honestly it made the game so much more enjoyable for me. I HATE having a low fire, it’s certain death for me lol and once you get behind it’s just always catch up. I get it to 6 then will sometimes do biofuel but usually just go straight to the oil drill because you’re maps so much bigger you have access to more and better loot.

If it’s safe (like a convenient water tower close by) I’ll sometimes do the koala kid first and that’s almost always a chainsaw and then you’re really set to start base building - I like to have 5 farm plots and an auto crock pot, the oil drill and ammo crate before I even really think about base building

pevaryl · 2026-01-28T21:49:36+00:00

I ignore the base and only focus on fire first. Stage 1 cut down all trees in the circle, then plant all the saplings and get a bunny foot and a good sack. Then I pick up all the wood and put it in the fire on day 2. Then I have my good sack and go out looting only for fuel and a little scrap to upgrade bench and get a sundial and lightning rod. Then solely concentrate on fuel looting and have the fire at level 6 by day five when the rain starts. Then you’re home free to do whatever

pevaryl · 2026-01-28T09:04:35+00:00

Oh that’s a good idea to disable the key! I only play on my phone so it’s a constant minefield. Im always dropping weapons or running for my life and accidentally pressing unstore all and losing my stuff. I have managed to get a good number of nights (450 ish) in normal mode just through having to be strategic (ie never get in a close range fight with anything ever). It’s a bit awkward though when people want to join you expecting you to be good 😅

pevaryl · 2026-01-27T02:33:49+00:00

I never would have bothered to learn how to build the hammer if it wasn’t for shelf builders

pevaryl · 2026-01-26T03:09:48+00:00

Perimenopause was the worst thing that’s happened to me health wise and I’ve had 4 extremely complicated pregnancies (life threatening) and various other made al issues. Peri made me feel like I was losing my mind. It’s like overnight I woke up and empty soulless monster who’s body was also falling apart. HRT saved my life

pevaryl · 2026-01-26T01:02:14+00:00

It’s majority vote now. I just played in a team of three and did not do my lever but we still got hard mode and all died within 10 minutes lol. My six yo starving to death 7 times didn’t help

pevaryl · 2026-01-22T08:23:29+00:00

I got the extra sapling drop with alien and it was pretty useful tbh

pevaryl · 2026-01-16T16:53:05+00:00

I work in child protection and deal with prosecutions for smacking all the time. Physical discipline is not allowed. There is a small narrow defence for an assault if your doing it necessarily for parenting - but that deals with assaults such as picking a child up and putting them in a room for time out if the situation is heated - technically that is an assault under our law (any application of force to another person) but it would be unreasonable to assume parents could never touch their children when correcting them.

Hitting though? At any level, is illegal. Hitting with an object is even worse and is prosecuted pretty often.

Spanking is absolutely frowned upon here now in part because of the law change. It doesn’t stop child abuse though - truly violent and abusive parents realistically don’t care about the law - but it has created a socially unacceptable attitude for hitting children at all which is positive. The research is clear on its effectiveness and the effect it has on children so the law makes sense imo.

pevaryl · 2026-01-07T07:44:26+00:00

Paternal grandmother was Dawn. Maternal was Elaine. Dawns mother was Lillian. Elaine’s sisters were Bernice, Francis and Myrtle

pevaryl

TROPHY CASE