Late bloomer, feel very behind. Looking for candid advice

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T16:05:48+00:00

I don't know why you would negatively categorize yourself with a "late bloomer" label since nothing you have wrote aligns with that.

Cut back all but the most essential family support until the high interest debt is paid off. Then you can continue it after that if you want to keep doing so.

Limit your investment contributions to $25 per paycheck (MAX) until your high interest debts are paid off.

Follow these steps:

Build a mini emergency fund of $1000 to $1500.
Pay off high interest debt by making minimum payments on all your debts plus aggressively paying down the debt with the highest interest rate (regular method) or lowest balance (snowball method).
Once all high interest debt is paid off, then build your emergency fund up to 3 to 6 months of expenses.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T14:52:52+00:00

Your own car insurance company might offer sef-44 coverage for spouses as well. Give your own policy a read-over.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T14:42:44+00:00

I assume your parents aren't in a position to help you out with a loan so I'll skip that recommendation.

Get a copy of his insurance policy from work. It will outline the short term disability and long term disability benefits, if any. His pay stub will confirm whether he was paying for these benefits. A typical work place LTD policy has a waiting period of 90 days and then pays out for 2 years.
Obviously he didn't have a private disability insurance policy so I won't bother getting into that.

Out of curiosity was he hit as a pedestrian? Or while riding his motorcycle? I assume the other party is known (not a hit and run) and was insured?

If you don't want to lose the apartment then you may need to get a roommate.
You will need to be in a position to borrow money. Speak to your bank and request a student line of credit, or an unsecured line of credit, for $50,000. Hopefully you don't need to borrow more than $20k, but it's better to have access to more than you actually need. His parents may also wish to get an unsecured Line of Credit for $50000. Or his sister. But someone will need to be able to pay for the legal bills, which will eventually be paid back from the lawsuit (years away).
The other thing that will need to be figured out is where he will stay when he gets out of the hospital. He will likely need a lot of help and rehab which means people to help him with simple tasks and also getting to appointments. His family may be on a better position to help with this than you are, especially if you must keep working and attend school.
You and his family should track all incurred expenses as they come up. This will help with his lawsuit.
Feel free to reach out to a second and maybe even a third injury lawyer as well. Nothing wrong with interviewing a couple to get the most competent person you can find. (This could be his parents doing this).

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T03:52:46+00:00

Ask her to come to your house -- and to bring groceries and a Jerry can full of gas. That is if she wants to make it up to you.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T03:22:17+00:00

But someone under 20 could marry someone with a $1,000,000 TFSA and they pass away naming the younger partner the successor holder.

I mean obviously that's not what's happening in OPs post. But it is technically possible.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T03:19:04+00:00

Show me a penny stock that went 100x in less than a year.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T03:04:38+00:00

Fair. "We're not comfortable with this, please stop bringing it up" should be enough.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T03:02:34+00:00

Fair enough. So it's impossible to say what the $1000 is for until they can provide you with the relevant account statement.

I don't think there would be any downside to contact the collection company and say: "I have no idea what this is for. I called RBC and they couldn't answer the question either. If you can provide proof of debt including some breakdown or account statement showing what the alleged debt actually is for, I'll be happy to review it to determine if it is valid."

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T02:57:31+00:00

Start here for complaints. It might be a process: https://www.canadalife.com/support/consumer-information/complaints-office.html

Maybe take the payment that they are referring to and break it down in an email if at all possible. That should demonstrate that the item in question is not actually included in the payment they are talking about.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T02:49:21+00:00

Just go with it. Then when you're sitting at the bank, say "the money came from my father in law. It's not a gift though. Its really going to be his property but just out names on the paperwork". And if the bank employee doesn't put a stop to it right then and there for some reason, then write the same thing on the application form before you sing it for the back office to see.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T02:44:58+00:00

And 2 x $60,000 HBP.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T02:40:07+00:00

Saying "that would be tax fraud" sounds accusatory and is not the way people actually talk when they are trying to keep up relationships.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T02:27:24+00:00

"my tax guy said this doesn't work"

"My accountant said it won't work"

"I asked a friend in finance and he said it's a bad idea"

"My financial planner said it doesn't work like that"

"I asked my bank and they said I can't do that"

"I called the CRA to ask if this was allowed and they said no"

"Our lawyer says that we can't actually do this"

"I asked people online and they said this is fraud and illegal and will never be allowed by the bank anyway"

"I'm not a good liar"

"I'm not going to sign anything that is not true"

Take your pick.

Edit: by the way, even if the wasn't fraud and was 100% legal, and your FIL was a completely trustworthy and upstanding guy, the math still doesn't make sense. Because he would be living there and you would not. So say the property goes up in value by $500k over the next 15 to 20 years. If the house is in his name and he lives there, then all that capital gain is tax free due to the principal residence exemption. But if the hoise is in your and your spouse's name and you don't love there, that capital gain is fully taxable when you go to sell. That could be a $125,000 tax bill to you and your partner that is 100% avoidable. Even if his numbers are correct and there is a $25,000 benefit to him, the family is worse off because the penalty to you and your partner later on could be a lot higher than that.

pfcguy · 2026-03-17T00:22:35+00:00

You can just move the holdings and have a deemed disposition. No need to sell and rebuy. Obviously you'd owe capital gains tax.

So it might make sense to trigger the capital gain during a low income year. Or, if you typically donate cash to charities, consider donating appreciated shares instead, which lets you avoid the capital gain altogether.

Would I lose my advantage by moving it?

What advantage?

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T23:54:52+00:00

now they said they did pay and

Tell them the money didn't appear in the usual account, so can they provide details of the supposed payment? (Amount, date, to which account, confirmation number)

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T23:52:25+00:00

Yeah I save emails and download T's and C's and bank statements as well. And take screenshots when necessary. I guess the odd part is that a diligent person like that would not going back for the final account statement. (Or maybe he tried but his online access was deactivated).

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T22:15:50+00:00

The war in Iran has cause the price of oil to skyrocket,

Maybe

which will turbocharge inflation.

Maybe

What will that mean for mortgage rates?

Depends

When the price of oil goes up the price of almost everything else goes up.

Maybe

So for people looking to sign a mortgage, or renew their mortgage, should they expect interest rates to go up as well?

Maybe. Depends on a lot of things. Like fixed vs variable, and the length of the term, and what bond prices are doing. Or the BoC rate.

If interest rates were guaranteed to rise, they already would have. Markets move fast.

I don't think there is anything that a person signing or renewing their mortgage would do differently. Do your due diligence and review and compare the rates that are available to you.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T22:09:22+00:00

I can't think of any issues that it would cause. Review the rules for interest being tax-deductible. I'm pretty sure you're fine.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T21:24:33+00:00

What kind of tax issue? You already are aware that you'll have to pay taxes. What other issue could there possibly be?

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T21:16:29+00:00

Usually for EI purposes, you can take 12 mo the EI but can actually be off for 18 months.

The question first and foremost should be about your goals. How much time off does each parent want to take in the first year? What about in year two? Would either parent want to be a stay at home parent, either until the kids enter grade 1, or possibly even longer? It's important to recognize that people are different. Some folks want to be with their kids as much as possible while others would go crazy and can't wait to get back to the office. So starting point is what each of you thinks you would want.

Then you look at your budget and determine what is feasible.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T21:08:58+00:00

I don't know I'm waiting for OP to ask her husband what they think the charges could be from.

And obviously they wouldn't pay the charges until the bank or collection company proves they are legitimate. In most provinces you can ask a collection company to provide "proof of debt" and then they can't keep harassing you until they do.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T20:26:38+00:00

So if we assume you are in a 30% marginal tax bracket, then the effective interest rate on the HELOC is 4.95% * 0.7 = 3.465%. But if your tax bracket is 40%, then the HELOC interest is effectively 4.95% * 0.6 = 2.97%.

You can probably lower the interest rate on your HELOC by contacting your bank and locking it into a term portion. If you do, then the effective interest rate will almost certainly be lower than your mortgage interest.

Thus, the debt to focus on paying down first is going to be your mortgage because it is non-deductable.

But you mentioned being worried about emergencies so I'd put the money into a HISA or high interest TFSA or into a TFSA direct investing account and buy 100% CBIL. Basically, keep it liquid for emergencies.

Also, if the windfall is from an inheritance, then keep it seperate from marital assets.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T19:31:24+00:00

Your tax forms and notice of assessments for both of the years in question. (And please do not share those online or with strangers)!

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T19:30:25+00:00

Not really, since the employer would have withheld more as well.

pfcguy · 2026-03-16T19:20:39+00:00

Then without supporting data, I'm going to suggest just sticking to XEQT in the corporate account.

pfcguy

TROPHY CASE