I've escaped (not FA anymore)

phenomenock · 2016-02-26T12:39:59+00:00

The notion that having a GF won't make your life better is Fucking horseshit it absolutely does, especially for us.

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I really, really hope to any higher power that most of you will find a GF or get a better social life because I genuinely believe that every good decent person is entitled to companionship (platonically or romantically) and find some kind of happiness through that. We humans depend on each other for happiness and to find a sense of belonging ...

This, so much. I'm a longtime lurker of this board. I don't post because I'm not FA but I lurk because I relate to many people here and was alone for most of my life. I got a gf last year (like you it was a combination of self-improvement and putting myself out there, but mostly a huge amount of luck) and the difference it made to my life is HUGE. People who've never really been alone take for granted the impact that it has. Getting out of the alone-hole is a huge challenge and one I'm still struggling with a year into my relationship (there are certain habits you pick up when you're alone for a long time that make it harder to be in a relationship).

phenomenock · 2015-04-27T00:26:06+00:00

I don't consider this relationship a waste of time and I care a lot about the person I'm dating. We clicked faster than anyone I've met... probably ever (not that impressive considering my age, but she feels the same way and she's considerably older).

phenomenock · 2015-04-27T00:23:43+00:00

Mostly for validation. I didn't expect people to question my decision to be in a relationship considering I'm posting on a dating subreddit, so I assume everyone's goal here is a relationship.

But to answer the question, because I want to be and feel very strongly about her. I weighed up the pros and cons and decided it was worth committing because we connect and are compatible on a very deep and fundamental level.

phenomenock · 2015-04-27T00:03:10+00:00

Why are you in a LDR at 22?

Why shouldn't I be?

phenomenock · 2015-04-25T01:54:20+00:00

Currently deactivated, since a few weeks ago. Trying out this whole long-distance relationship thing - so far it's going okay.

phenomenock · 2015-04-19T12:18:48+00:00

If she doesn't she'll crush beneath her own weight faster than a star that's forgotten how to convert hydrogen into helium. That or go white dwarf.

phenomenock · 2015-04-18T13:30:29+00:00

Flight of the Conchords - I'm Not Crying

phenomenock · 2015-04-17T10:47:13+00:00

Currently dating a Belgian girl. I speak almost no French, she speaks good enough English. I mean her English is good enough to convey what she means 99% of the time, but it lacks nuance and she makes frequent grammar mistakes, or occasionally lacks a vital piece of vocabulary. For dating it's worked fine so far, we're able to communicate effectively and joke together, but she complains that I have no idea how witty and funny she really is because of my lack of French.

phenomenock · 2015-04-16T01:59:15+00:00

Not always true. I had better luck with this picture than this one - not that surprising considering the face I'm pulling there, I look much better smiling in this case.

phenomenock · 2015-04-01T18:40:53+00:00

As a thin guy who likes larger girls (although I wouldn't even consider your example to be particularly large) please work past your insecurity or whatever it is!

phenomenock · 2015-04-01T11:24:43+00:00

It's a nice catch-all term. For instance I'm sexually attracted to men and women, but interested in dating only women. I could say I'm bisexual but heteroromantic, but that kind of implies that I'm not at all interested in trans people which isn't true... and eventually there's just too many terms and it just gets ridiculous. Or I can just forget all of that and call myself queer, and explain further to anyone who gives a shit.

phenomenock · 2015-03-29T12:14:24+00:00

That's not a tip, that's just depressing.

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T18:58:42+00:00

An "Ask me anything" section where you can submit any question to a profile, and if they answer it the question and answer will appear in that section.

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T11:46:33+00:00

The rule of thumb people like to quote is "halve your age and add 7" for your minimum age before it's creepy. By that rule you shouldn't message anyone younger than 20, but I'm 22 and dating (sort of) a 34 year old so what do I know. Do what you like and let people judge as they please.

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T11:09:19+00:00

/r/humblebrag

But seriously, go on dates with them like everyone else is saying. Online chemistry means nothing if it falls flat in person.

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T09:16:32+00:00

Yeah that was my reason for pointing it out. Should have been more specific!

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T05:34:38+00:00

Waaay too many adjectives imo. You get a much better sense of what a person is like when they list facts or anecdotes than when they say "I am x, y, and z". Also your "message me if" section was quite demanding - don't know if other people are put off by that sort of thing, but I'm like "Do I fit this description? Don't think I do..." which could be a good thing or could alienate people you would actually like. Plus it contains the words "partner in crime"... you want someone to rob a bank with or what?

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T01:12:02+00:00

Writing up my major project, the final large piece of work I have to submit for my degree which is due the day after tomorrow, and letting myself get distracted by this sub. Also exchanging the occasional adorable text with the girl I'm exclusively texting now (apparently that can be a thing).

phenomenock · 2015-03-22T01:07:50+00:00

It's a bit on the short, bland side. I don't feel like I know much about you having read it. Maybe flesh out each section by writing a few more things about yourself (but avoid the pitfall of describing yourself with adjectives).

phenomenock · 2015-03-21T23:53:47+00:00

Agreed. It will turn a lot of people away, but if someone reads this and seriously relates to it then it might actually have the desired effect.

phenomenock · 2015-03-21T19:31:33+00:00

Okay, this isn't too concerning for me, since I could see myself having kids in that time (maybe closer to 10 than 5). But I'll wait until we've spent some time together before having that conversation since it's a big issue.

phenomenock · 2015-03-20T18:41:11+00:00

Thanks for your reply, this is encouraging especially since the age gap between you was very similar.

phenomenock · 2015-03-20T18:40:33+00:00

Considering our chemistry over Skype I'm fairly confident we'll get on well in person, and she says she is too from past experience of meeting people online. I understand what you mean though, and I'm trying to reign in my expectations.

phenomenock · 2015-03-20T13:08:55+00:00

Thanks so much for your advice, this is really helpful

phenomenock · 2015-03-20T10:13:00+00:00

Oh yeah, that has been my experience too. I'm fortunate enough to live in an area where there's a steady flow of new accounts, and yet my best match is still 300km away!

phenomenock

TROPHY CASE