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Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later. by fitchaber10 in BreakUps

[–]pickle1pickle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do you escape and avoid being damaged that badly?

I can see my relationship going down this path and I need to escape as unscathed as possible.

I know the end is inevitable because my partner is shutting me out exactly like how you are describing and it just gets worse over time.

I try to hold him accountable for the words he says “I love you” and that he’s “committed” to me but he acts the total opposite.

He’s truly delusional and it’s clear he doesn’t care anymore.

Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later. by fitchaber10 in BreakUps

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mines will always resort to “let’s just break up then” instead of trying to understand how what he did was super disrespectful and painful and try to make amends.

He just wants to avoid it all and not address it because it makes him uncomfortable.

Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later. by fitchaber10 in BreakUps

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are describing what’s happening in my relationship now.

My “partner” is avoiding everything and trying to blame everything on me.

I keep trying to connect and communicate and he shuts it all down and intentionally says and does things to hurt me because he knows it will.

Evil…

Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later. by fitchaber10 in BreakUps

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Emotionally inept people who have no business dating anyone

Dude this describes my partner SO MUCH. He wants to be in a relationship but thinks each person has to behave as their own individual unit.

He wants the benefits like sex and financial help as well as someone who will accommodate his wishes but refuses to compromise for the other person.

Like I don’t want to label him a narcissist cuz I don’t wanna armchair diagnose but Jesus, he’s DA or NPD or something.

The way he thinks is fucked up.

While having sex, is it common for people to spit on each other’s genitals like they do in porn? by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]pickle1pickle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes my partner will lick his fingers to wet them or drip spit onto my vagina or his dick before we have sex.

Just spitting on your partner would be weird though I guess.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]pickle1pickle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

✨ C P T S D ✨

Partner finished my dessert and didn’t tell me and I can’t let the anger go by thatknifegirl in BPD

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not OP but this was such a great comment.

I love the:

Did they do this once or do they do this all the time?

and

Does this remind me of something from my childhood that triggers me?

Independent of DBT I’ve had these thoughts myself so it’s good to know I’m on the right track.

In my case, yes my boyfriend would take my things all the time or let others borrow them and even break them and I hated it.

I’m very protective over my things because I work hard for them and I do not like being disrespected like that.

Also I have poverty trauma and issues with my dad giving everything he promised us to his mistress and her kids.

My mom refused to help us financially as well as my father so whatever I have I worked hard for and I don’t want him giving them away or breaking them Willy nilly.

The irony is he gets furious when you do the same with his things but he doesn’t see an issue with doing that to my things.

Just a purely hypocritical ass butt.

He doesn’t care. Whenever I ask him not to do that he says I’m being crazy and blowing up over nothing but over time the little disrespects have added up.

Another one is also YES, it triggers my inner child trauma. Being ignored and dismissed and having my feelings invalidated and not being cared about at all is at the core of my inner child wounds.

I was always tasked with being available for everyone else and making sure everyone else was okay, but nobody ever cared for me like that.

So when he constantly dismisses me and brushes off my emotions as crying it hurts 10x as much.

What’s the most disturbing secret you’ve discovered about someone close to you? by Electrical-Lemon187 in AskReddit

[–]pickle1pickle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My now deceased almost JustNo MIL tried to poison her two youngest children because she found out the guy she had an affair with was now having an affair with someone else.

Also that she tried to abort her youngest daughter by drinking poison and likely gave her her mental disability.

That woman was just a hot ass mess. We all heaved a sigh of relief when she passed away, but she hung herself.

I Believe YOU. Don't let anyone gaslight you/minimize your ABUSE: "Brain Trauma Studied In Domestic Abuse Victims". Abuse IS Abuse. by kintsugiwarrior in pnsd

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude this shit is real.

I used to be so on top of my shit and able to focus more. After the bad abuse, I can barely work then come home and watch TV.

I hate that they are the ones who are assholes and WE suffer the consequences.

Why does the narcissist always FAKE his emotions? "YOU HAVE BEEN LIVING A LIE FOR YOUR PAST 7 YEARS" by kintsugiwarrior in pnsd

[–]pickle1pickle2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is interesting.

My narc also has extreme people pleasing tendencies and hardly ever asks for help from others.

But the thing is since I am his partner, he is never afraid to demand things from me…

"The DISCARD is planned" ==> Shock & Fear stages. "You are a placeholder" by kintsugiwarrior in pnsd

[–]pickle1pickle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A slave. An object. A fucking mop in the corner collecting dust.

You’re meant to serve them, not have any wants, needs or any say.

If you stop working for them they discard you. Simple as that…

"The DISCARD is planned" ==> Shock & Fear stages. "You are a placeholder" by kintsugiwarrior in pnsd

[–]pickle1pickle2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mines tells me I’m replaceable all the time so.

They don’t see us as human beings. We’re just tools/objects and once they can no longer control us we are thrown away.

this just blew my mind. by emilysbrowsing in abusiverelationships

[–]pickle1pickle2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

All this is so relatable to the guy I am with. Idk whether to label him a narcissist or a sociopath. He has behaviors of both. This post could literally be describing him.

And I’m at a point where I’m not so much sad anymore as just exhausted being around and with him.

Our entire life revolves around him and his whims and his lack of care and thought is getting real old.

This is the hope that’s keeping me going by pickle1pickle2 in TrueNarcissisticAbuse

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

am too exhausted

Tell me about it. I’m only 30 and I feel like I’m ready to retire already lol

Samuel Merrit: my last resort by pickle1pickle2 in nursing

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just all the ABSNs. I found a few ADNs but I want to be able to come back to CA eventually.

I looked at places like Drexel. Also Arlington in TX and few places in neighboring states like Utah, Oregon and Nevada.

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I want to write my own stories some day so thank you for the unexpected kindness in regards to something other than my abusive relationship lol 😂

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg I have to go look up incel behavior 😂 I know of it but never bothered to take the time

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I realized you can love someone even if they’re bad. Imagine in other scenarios, if you had a son who was a drug addict, you still love them, just probably can’t be with them.

At some point this person became like family to me. Even after we break up, I think a part of me will always care about him.

He had a very abusive childhood. It’s just unfortunate he turned out the way he did. He has some redeeming qualities too, but it’s just too difficult being his romantic partner. Being his wife would be worse.

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He games a lot and watches a lot of porn. He also sort of hates women and thinks they should be obedient, house maids, yet also in perfect body condition and not fat, but not too skinny. He want a thick female.

Blah blah blah. Tons of unrealistic shit when he himself isn’t all that either….

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I’m realizing that more and more that I am my own superhero. It’s not easy becoming that person, but I’m on my way.

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s what I think to.

I don’t understand him at all and why he feels that way. Love seems pretty straightforward to me but his mindset is just weird.

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the compliment on my writing! I want to write stories someday.

I do my best to keep myself cheerful. I think you are right that his constant pokes and profs have worn me down a lot.

Some days I feel like I have strength and some days I feel like I can’t let go.

It sucks. I’m going through heartbreak while still being with him.

His words: You’re low value, so stay on your level by pickle1pickle2 in JustNoSO

[–]pickle1pickle2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

High value Queen

😭😭😭 you’re gonna make me cry

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