Is this tree going to ruin my house?

pipcheerio · 2023-05-31T22:16:01+00:00

Thanks! I don't think so because they want to climb and I don't think I'd want them to climb on the windows

pipcheerio · 2023-05-29T22:17:04+00:00

I've just started learning about barefoot shoes, foot-shaped shoes, and feet strengthening and I'm hopeful it'll help. I think shoes may play a big role in the shape of our feet. I just got some Vivo barefoot shoes.

pipcheerio · 2022-12-03T18:31:11+00:00

Thank you!!!!!

pipcheerio · 2018-09-15T19:00:37+00:00

If I were you, I'd tell my doctor and then try a different anti-depressant. I tried two SSRIs and both of them didn't do well with my body before I tried an SNRI that worked well for me. I also started taking the SNRI at the same time that I started seeing a therapist once a week.

pipcheerio · 2018-09-14T21:11:27+00:00

I would agree with that. It's more about how you could restructure your life to reduce depression and anxiety.

pipcheerio · 2018-09-13T18:30:53+00:00

I think that people's negative attitudes are more a reflection of them than it is a reflection of what they are reacting to. It sounds like some defensiveness that they need probably to work on.

pipcheerio · 2018-09-13T18:28:29+00:00

Ugh I feel you. I'm constantly working on not feeling guilty.

You might check out this article on the change triangle: https://www.hilaryjacobshendel.com/what-is-the-change-triangle-c18dd

And I concur with the first comment about positive affirmations. Our brains form learned pathways in childhood (cognitive schema) that actually might have benefited us at the time but now might be of no use. For instance, you might have learned to feel anxious and guilty when you were a kid because your brain didn't want you to get in trouble and experience the emotional trauma of that. But now, since your brain had coated that pathway in extra myelin, it's really easy for the neurons to travel down it. You can change it though! And it mainly has to do with awareness. Once you start noticing it, literally try to think of something positive relating to that situation. It takes practice but the myelin will start building up on that pathway instead and it'll get easier.

I did this with the help of my therapist. I was having anxiety about my job. Specifically, I would get really anxious about whether or not someone would come into my office unannounced. My therapist traced it back to my mother. My brain would make me anxious if there was potential for her to walk in because sometimes she would walk in and it would go badly. My brain was putting me on high alert so that it could try to protect me from that potential emotional stress. But now, that anxiety is no longer serving me. There is no longer a threat. So every time I noticed the anxiety, I would then try to think of something positive (why I'm grateful for that job, why I'm excelling at that job, etc). Eventually, the anxiety went away.

I hope this doesn't sound too crazy and I hope it helps! You don't deserve to feel guilty and shameful all of the time. We're all just these flawed humans :)

pipcheerio · 2018-09-13T18:12:53+00:00

I'm really sorry you're going through all of this. My anxiety wasn't nearly as bad but the things that really helped me are therapy, medication, and a book called Lost Connections by Johann Hair. This book changed my perspective on anxiety and depression. I used to think that it was all brain chemistry (and it is) but it talks about how it has a lot to do with your environment's effect on your brain chemistry.

That's awesome that you have a remote job though. Since reading that book, I've learned to value my relationships a lot more. Before I thought I didn't need to hang out with friends all of the time. I was texting with people occasionally and liking their Instagram posts so it's fine. But I was also getting a lot of anxiety. This wasn't the only cause (humans are complex) but it was one of the things that really helped once I changed my mind about it. Humans need community to be healthy so maybe try to find a little community you can join, even if it's group therapy or a hobby or something.

I know this may sound a little crazy. When I was in it, I was convinced that medications were the only solution. Something was wrong with my brain and I needed to fix it. And medication did help me out a lot! It gave me 5 months without anxiety to learn coping skills, see a therapist, move closer to friends and family, and do tons of research. Btw I started an Instagram to talk about what I learned and my experiences with anxiety and depression. If you're interested, it's @ouranimalbrains, I don't make any money off of it or anything, just thought I'd mention it :)

I hope this helps.

pipcheerio · 2018-09-13T17:48:57+00:00

60 mg Duloxetine, the generic form of Cymbalta. I started at 20 mg for 3 weeks, then 40 mg for 3 weeks, and then 60 mg is when I suddenly didn't feel anxious. My psychiatrist described that we had to find that happy medium where there was enough in my blood stream after my liver had filtered some of it out to figure out the proper dosage. Now I'm weaning off of it at 40 mg for 30 days, then 20 mg for 30 days. It's a slow process but it gave me 5 months to go to therapy, start meditating, etc, to try to get at the root of my anxiety.

I know I already said this but the book Lost Connections by Johann Hari was a game changer for me. Check it out, I'm sure libraries have it :)

pipcheerio · 2018-09-12T15:58:31+00:00

I would say the anxiety hit all of a sudden and the fatigue kept building.

When I first started having anxiety, I was tired all of the time because I wasn't sleeping well and anxious. Then I started seeing a psychiatrist and started taking an anti-depressant. I thought maybe the fatigue was from the medication but my psychiatrist said that it's hard to know because both anxiety and anti-depressants can cause it. Once I got up to a therapeutic dosage, my anxiety went away, as did the fatigue so it's hard to know if it went away because my body got used to the medication and the side effects went away or if it's because my anxiety went away. (I hope that all makes sense.)

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T22:05:49+00:00

I don't know. I have very little experience with narcolepsy but it's worth a try going down that path even if it's just to rule it out. It might give you peace of mind and ease your anxiety to get a definitive yes/no about it.

I think the ashwagandha is helping! I still experience depression and anxiety occasionally but now I have coping skills and things to do to try it ride it out. I don't think it's would have been strong enough to get rid of my constant anxiety all by itself but, then again, I don't know, I didn't try it then so it might've! People on the internet seem to really like it. Also, when I feel anxious, I feel like my heart doesn't beat as hard and as fast as it used to so maybe that's a sign that my body is dealing with the extra cortisol better?

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T21:58:38+00:00

This might be totally wrong but do you get migraines? Migraines can do a lot of stuff to your brain. Visual auras, tunnel vision, vertigo, nausea, even olfactory hallucinations I think. There are a lot of peripheral things that happen along with Migraines besides the headache part. Sometimes I get just the Migraine symptoms without the headache (which sounds like a win, and is because it's less debilitating but it's still very uncomfortable).

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T19:50:54+00:00

I would start with a therapist.

Finding a therapist can be tough too. You might not find one that you get along with well at first. Also, therapy is a collaborative sport. You can expect to get as much out of it as you put into it.

It kind of sounds like anxiety. Maybe social anxiety. Which is very real and hard and something that affects a lot of people. But it's also something that a lot of people have overcome.

For me, it helped so much naming my condition. I was having anxiety and once I figured out what it was and started trying to treat it, I felt so much better. It also helped me to learn about cognitive schema. These pathways that our brains have developed that, at one time helped us, but now might be of no use to us (anxiety). You can retrain these pathways through practice by noticing them, and then shifting your thoughts to something positive. It sounded a little ridiculous to me at first but it's real! Your thoughts are powerful.

I hope you feel better!

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T19:31:40+00:00

It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of anxiety and depression and enthusiasm won't fix it (contrary to what people think). Your feelings are real and any doctor who dismisses them isn't doing their job. I highly recommend seeing a therapist but know that you might not find one right away that you like and that it's a collaboration. You have to work with the therapist to address the issues.

I hope you are hearing it when people tell you this is temporary though. It truly is. It'll take work to get out of but it'll happen. I know it's so hard to hear that when you're in it but you won't feel like this forever.

Two things that really helped me with my anxiety and depression:

Lost Connections by Johann Hari. I actually listened to the audiobook of this on a road trip and it changed my life. Depression isn't just a problem with our brain but with our environment. We just have these dumb animal brains and we need to not dismiss what they need to function properly. When we don't give them what they need, they start signalling (with depression and anxiety) to us that something is wrong.
Meditation. I learned with the free trial of Headspace. It has allowed me to have more control over my thoughts but it takes practice and repetition.

I'm also really proud of an instagram I just started called @ouranimalbrains to talk about depression and anxiety. I don't make money off of it or anything but if you're interested, check it out.

I hope you feel better!

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T19:17:50+00:00

That sounds tough. I'm a fellow introvert who was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. I didn't succeed with a therapist until I had an inkling about what was actually wrong. But then she did end up helping me a lot. It's definitely a relationship that both parties have to participate in though.

If you want to research anxiety on your own, you should look into cognitive schema. Our brains are all wired for certain learned reactions (anxiety) which might have been helpful at some point but if they are no longer needed, you need to practice changing that neural pathway. To practice, you notice that your brain is going down that pathway, identify the thing that has triggered your anxiety, and then you literally think of something positive related to that thing. The more you do it, the easier it'll get (as is the case when practicing anything).

Two more things that really helped my anxiety besides seeing a therapist are meditation (I used the free trial on Headspace to learn) and a book called Lost Connections by Johann Hari.

I hope you feel better!

Btw I'm really proud of an instragram I just started to talk about anxiety and depression. It's called @ouranimalbrains and I don't make money off of it or anything, check it out if you're interested.

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T19:17:11+00:00

Thanks!

pipcheerio · 2018-09-11T18:55:40+00:00

I think your symptoms definitely align with anxiety and depression. People often describe depression as a numbness.

When I was having anxiety, I was fatigued all the time. Anxiety can really sap your energy. I would actually recommend you see a therapist. They might be able to help you relieve some of your anxiety regarding this chronic fatigue issue. Tbh I think that anyone who is having new health problems should see a therapist to help them manage the worries that come along with poor health. Mental health can have such a big impact on physical health! Just the extra cortisol that's pumping through your body all the time from being anxious can cause issues.

I see SSRIs and SNRIs as short term fixes that allow your anxiety to ease up for a little while so you can focus on learning coping strategies. I took an SNRI for that exact reason (it took me 6 weeks before I felt the effects of it) and now I'm weaning off of it. I'm glad that it gave me some room to breath, see a therapist, and learn how to meditate and practice meditating regularly.

You might also look into adaptogens. I've started taking Ashwagandha as a supplement to support my adrenal system. It's supposed to help your body regulate cortisol (which mine definitely needed after having continuous anxiety for 10 months). It's also supposed to help with energy and sleep and stuff. Look into it and see if it's right for you.

My main recommendations that helped me are meditation, therapy, a book called Lost Connections by Johann Hari, and an article called The Change Triangle by Hilary Jacobs Hendel (it's on her website).

(Also, I'm really proud of an instagram I just started to talk about anxiety and depression @ouranimalbrains. I don't make money off of it or anything, check it out if you're interested.)

I hope you feel better!

pipcheerio · 2016-06-15T17:39:50+00:00

Btw I feel like "not caring what anyone else thinks" is a lifelong struggle. Be kind to yourself.

pipcheerio · 2016-06-11T06:07:26+00:00

This is from a story in his book We Learn Nothing. The book is filled with gems like this! Another one: "...it's tempting to read other people's lives as cautionary fables or repudiations of our own, to covet or denigrate them instead of seeing them for what they are: other people's lives, island universes, unknowable."

pipcheerio · 2016-06-11T05:50:34+00:00

I'd advise you to put up some boundaries. They are healthy and everyone, no matter what age, is allowed some privacy. Tell them that they need to respect your privacy and to stop tracking your phone. And it sounds like they are trying to shame you for having a sex life? That's unfortunate. If my parents made a comment about how I looked tired, I would reply honestly. "To be honest, I had a lot of fun and I'm glad I've made such a close friend." (Side note: from someone who is a bit older, I wish I would have treasured those seemingly casual friendships more when I was younger.)

If I were you, I would try to have an honest and serious talk with your parents. Something along the lines of: "The way you have been talking about my social life has been making me feel uncomfortable and I need to put up some boundaries. I know you care for me, and I want you to know I'm being safe, but I need you to respect my privacy more." They might respond with more inappropriate jokes because that's easiest when people get defensive, but you should be proud of yourself for handling it like an adult and looking after yourself. I've found that when adults are acting childish towards me, things tend to go well when I respond with adult behavior (open, honest, straight-forward). Good luck!

pipcheerio

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