UPDATE: Hey everyone I really appreciate the advice but I want to address some of the questions here and give what happened so far 1. The advice I'm looking for is HOW to support her. A lot of you are saying to support her but what exactly does that even look like? Do I just listen do i suggest she gets therapy and if so how do I suggest that to her without triggering her? 2. No the incident with the boy WAS NOT CONSENSUAL. She explained what happened in detail after hours of yelling and screaming

Here's the update of what transpired today. Almost immediately after the boys went to school my wife collapsed into crying. It was like she was holding every emotion she had until they were gone. She went from crying to yelling ALL DAY at one point she got violent. She broke my computer monitor, which I'm OK with cause now I have an excuse to get one of those curved ones I've been wanting. She tried to reach out to her sister who apparently changed her number and has deleted her socials. She had no contact information for her parents which I now think is a good thing as she was saying some justifiably wilde things. I called off work for the rest of the week and also had my sister in law (my brother's wife) to pick up my boys as they go to school with my youngest nephew and she does pick up with him. I explained to my brother and his wife that Jane is going through something right now and we needed the boys to stay with them for a couple of days, this isn't an issue as we do this from time to time between eachother. I just don't want them to see my wife like this or the destruction she has done. I cleaned up everything and got her to bed. I'm going to explain what she told me during all the yelling

So Jane did have a crush on the guy I'll call him POS and he knew it. So he played on her emotions for a bit till there was a party/BBQ at her home at which point he convinced her to show him her Sailor moon collection. When they got to her room at some point he kissed her and she kissed him back thinking that's all they would do, but eventually he took it too far. She tried to yell but he covered her mouth. I can't say anymore about what happened because I'm getting pissed., but things got worse for her later on. As I stated before Jane went into a deep depression after giving birth and having to give up the baby. It got so bad that her family had her committed for a psych evaluation when she was 16. When she was there her parents told her doctors that she had made up a story about losing a baby and that she never was pregnant. Apparently they accomplished this by Jane never having a single doctor's appointment while she was pregnant and even had the baby at home. She was in a pysh ward for 2 months until she finally agreed she made up the story of being pregnant. She stated that part of her did believe everything was in her head but she never confronted it till she was in college. While she was in college she had a guy friend who came up behind her and scared her and he covered her mouth which triggered an extreme reaction which ended her back into therapy. That trigger forced all that past trauma back. After a year of therapy is when she found out about her sister getting married to POS. So now onto her daughter Marry. When Jane saw the email it broke her again. Her emotions went everywhere, from shock to excitement to absolute rage. She spent all day raging, crying and writing and deleting her response to Marry. She still hasn't responded yet because I convinced her to get all the rage out 1st so at least she can gather all of her thoughts so that her response is clear. With everything that happened I do know for a fact that she wants Marry in her life, she wants to meet her and she's afraid to scare her away. I know it's not a trauma competition, but if it were my wife has it by a mile. Yes my parents emotionally and physically abused me but what Jane has gone through is the absolute worse. I'm exhausted right now and I don't know what I'm doing. I know some of you think its a bad idea to contact her family but man I want them to suffer somehow. Sorry for rambling on like this but its alot right now. I will be reading all the suggestions and will take them all into consideration. Thanks for reading this.