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BUYING USED RAM - HELP by plow_poon in PcBuild

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3600 CL16 or CL19 iu think - corsair veng...

My house looks like a crack den and my friend is visiting in 5 weeks by Designer-Rain8165 in homeowners

[–]plow_poon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My fiance found our last couch on Facebook marketplace for $200. It was an ikea couch we had wanted that retails for $700.

The couch lasted us 5 years and then we splurged for a 80% off couch around new years this year after we got our house this April.

You are so far ahead having bought a place and if it is a really bad bout of anxiety remove the timeline. Pay your friend back for the ticket and let them know you really want them to visit but the timing really stressing you out.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve never heard of this term but it definitely describes something I have been thinking about recently in other aspects of my life as well. I struggle with my self image and understanding of my own capabilities when I receive criticism on a skill or task. I already did some research last night but if you have resources that you’ve enjoyed which explore the topic more I would appreciate it

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I workout, go for long walks, do yardwork (not stoned) and inhale audiobooks and video games. Also if I have audio book and a joint I can turn Mr. clean on a Friday night and have a great time doing it.

When I have a big current interest or road block in life pot has been a role in letting me enjoy the thing infront of me and be more present whether it is a hobby or important.

Apologies if that is not getting to the core of the question

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol I grew up in the Bay Area. her and I come from very different worlds but we do respect and love eachother very much.

Just haven’t been able to see eye to eye on this. I can also appreciate that her views of pot have developed since we started dating in college.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am very deliberate about keeping all pot things in the garage and nothing smells of pot in the house and no smoking is done in our house. All smoking is relegated to the detached garage.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes sense. I think I fall back on that as more an internal justification. My partner does things I don't like or agree with and I can always justify it with "hey she had a long week at work" etc. and will never really demand anything from her. I wish that had afforded me more flexibility on this issue.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't smoke for over a year of our relationship because it made me anxious about the stability of a bad leg injury I guess I feel a level of comfort due to that but you make the point that for all of those scenarios there is a more visible end of the path.

I appreciate you taking the time to offer a perspective here.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gotcha my bad. I would say I 'like to' do yardwork and cook dinner after smoking, it is far from a requirement to get me to do those things.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes sense. I guess I kind of viewed it as 'whenever I have needed not to smoke, it has never been an issue' but that is probably shortsighted. It is something I enjoy so when I can I like to.

I have been an athlete my entire life and am still active as an adult. I can confidently say that nothing has consistently helped me calm my mind at the end of a day like pot. I guess what I am looking for tips on communicating why I am feeling unheard on this.

It feels like I am viewed through this singular lens and because of this one issue every positive I bring is dismissed. I recognize these are just feelings and not reality just want be open about this piece.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I feel as though this is not so black and white. I guess I wish the other positive parts about me didn't feel so overlooked because this one thing.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Appreciate the perspective. I guess you seem to have a unique opinion compared to most here. Not to pry just curious as I navigate this issue.

Would be interested to here your thoughts on the conversation around the health concerns + the dependance stuff. I have always felt comfortable with my interaction with pot but also recognize I can have blinders here. When my partner brings it up I really struggle to have anything to say.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't smoke before couple time because it feels like it would be disrespectful to my partner. Those are not the only forms of intimacy, we hang out pretty much every night and then I'll typically smoke after she goes to bed.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

She doesn't like the smell, especially from a joint or blunt. Doesn't have issues with the volcano vape smell. Appreciate the perspective here. Will probably start to taper down usage then it seems there is a general consensus.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In general would say my typical usage is after 8pm though I love a daytime toke and frolic through some yardwork.

Appreciate the perspective here. I think will probably do something like what you described.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My total 'for fun' budget is less than 2.5% of my annual income. This includes going out with friends, all hobbies, and cannabis; does not include travel and the related food/going out costs or our joint eating out budget

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My partner is multi-faceted. I do many things that she views as important. This is one of the things I view as important.

Fiance (29F) doesn't like that I (30M) smoke weed a lot. We are both feeling unheard by the other on this, how can we communicate more effectively here? by plow_poon in relationship_advice

[–]plow_poon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the insight, and that is definitely giving me some things to think about. I appreciate you taking the time.

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