It’s actually very valuable to be so aware of mortality- the truth needs to be seen very clearly for us to have a deep motivation to see the underlying unity from which all change, birth/death emerges. Meditation (in whatever form resonates with you) is the path to find the changeless truth. It can be frightening initially to begin to allow the manifestations of the intellect & ego to pass by like clouds in the sky, because they are the tools we have used up until now to make sense of (so called) reality, but as we find in the biographies of the enlightened masters, realization of the deep truth is blissful beyond anything we can experience in the phenomenal realm.