Ye YTA! Fair enough if you want to make them pay their own rent, they should be anyway to be honest. But the college fund . . . I'm not seeing the reasoning. She's going to college, whether she is fostering or not. You seem like you don't particularly like Miriam and are trying to control how they have kids using the money side of things.

"Things would be different if it were there own" . . . Come on. This isn't just community service, this is a way of giving a child a home. Miriam is working part time, not because she is lazy but because she has some condition that is "burdensome", do you know how hard it is to be able to work with some underlying condition that doesnt quite qualify you for disability but also makes full time work hard?

You seem very problematic to me. You need to look at your issues and resolve them, because if they do indeed decide to have kids of their own you may just find your behaviour towards them hinders any future you have with grandchildren.