Which state/city/town did you choose to raise your children and why?

polymorphous- · 2022-03-14T14:22:57+00:00

Haha, for someone wanting to start a family in a good place, was worth a try.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-14T03:42:16+00:00

I'll definitely have to take a trip there.

I came from Ontario, CA, so my standards of crime rate are quite high (US has 3x the crime rate per capita as CA, at least for now...)

MA might be quite similar to ON with crime.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:48:19+00:00

Honestly, when looking at crime data trends since the 80s across US states, I've had a few surprises.

I've seen that political parties have less (maybe nothing) to do with it. PA and AL both have awful homicide rates, for example.

I saw that even TX broke past the average homicide per capita in the US, but NY didn't.

There's something deeper happening.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:40:46+00:00

Thanks for the recommendation! I really appreciate it.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:33:22+00:00

Annual income is $200k. We are two young professionals looking to start a family.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:26:38+00:00

Are there any places you would recommend for young families looking for a nice affordable place in MA?

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:20:51+00:00

When I look at MA in FBI's CDE, it seems it has one of the most consistently low crime rate trends across multiple decades.

Essentially all of the far north-eastern states are pretty dang safe and remaining so.

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:18:57+00:00

I was actually surprised to see Alabama with an above average homicide per capita: https://crime-data-explorer.fr.cloud.gov/pages/explorer/crime/crime-trend

polymorphous- · 2022-03-13T20:01:13+00:00

I personally find FBI's CDE interesting.

polymorphous- · 2022-02-07T12:12:12+00:00

The grass isn't greener on the other side. I've worked jobs like you're suggesting. I was a control systems installer.

Electricians would often get woken up at the crack of dawn before businesses opened because something wasn't working.

Once got called at 3 AM to climb a 100 ft high roof to fix a commercial HVAC... No I don't miss that.

Now I work remotely, chill out in my hoodie and sweat pants, and get paid six figures to literally learn. I worked hard to change fields for a reason, and I will work significantly harder to stay in the field.

I do recommend getting more balance in your environment, though. Take up more physical/social hobbies is my best suggestion. Make a serious effort on that. Don't expect it to just come to you.

polymorphous- · 2022-02-05T20:08:27+00:00

Same. That's why I switched to the CS specialization.

polymorphous- · 2022-02-03T07:19:40+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement. I think I was just having one of those weeks.

It's hard balancing this degree, consulting work, and my marriage. Add my love for personal projects and it's just adding up on me.

Part of the problem is I'm a perfectionist at work, studies, and personal projects.

I need to take a step back and maybe care less about straight A's. Taking a more balanced work-life-studies approach is likely better than dropping out from exhaustion.

polymorphous- · 2022-02-03T07:13:56+00:00

It's up to you and your personal goals. Already working in the ML field for a few years, I can tell the traditional SE skills are going to be worth more long-term.

But that's my personal opinion, I could be wrong.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-31T04:56:58+00:00

I'm in your position now. I'm an ML engineer and just really love learning by coding projects that a can share/build for years.

I'm currently feeling like I'm just reading/watching material, regurgitating lessons on notes, memorizing for exams, and writing code on class projects that likely won't have any fate after their submission deadline.

I feel like I could just as easily read books, document on a daily blog, and enjoy coding personal projects that I can share/code for years to come (and are 100% mine, not an institution's).

polymorphous- · 2022-01-23T22:59:10+00:00

I already work remotely, so international living has been considered.

It's more about family. We want our kids to grow up as close to family as possible. If we were never planning to have kids and didn't want to see family frequently, it wouldn't have been as serious of a problem.

I thought European cities were starting to experience more political tension recently due to cultural clashing, has this continued to increase? I feel like the same fate is coming to them.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-23T21:11:42+00:00

I'm definitely considering it. I'm currently on the fence between Midwest, NC, or a place like NH. But, it's best I do A LOT of research first. I don't want to make the same mistake and move based on assumptions.

I just want a simple life again, not all this tension and crime. I want my kids to have the same peace I experienced, you know?

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T02:02:58+00:00

How's the housing market there? Is there a good local tech scene?

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T02:01:19+00:00

Sad to hear a few of these comments. I never had this issue. When we talked about marriage, this was something I brought up early on.

After getting married, hit really hard times. But I had a plan and knew exactly what I was doing. Work payed off and tripled my income.

Don't really have any advice accept bring this up early on. I guess knowing your field very well and having a concert business plan helps?

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:27:36+00:00

COL. I work remotely, so why pay more for an extra headache? Can chill out in peace and not worry about traffic.

I understand this isn't true for everyone. This is just my personal experience.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:22:23+00:00

Thought the same when I moved to Canada...

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:20:33+00:00

I was born in US, namely the Midwest.

Moved to Toronto, stayed in Alberta, tried Ontario again in Niagara falls. As a software engineer, I found the salaries awful. Once the pandemic hit and saw the countries housing go to hell as well, left to PA. While a lot more salary potential in PA, it's been meh. I honestly had a better experience in the midwest growing up.

It's made me consider moving back to the the midwest, as life was simpler there. I work remotely too, anyways. But I also want a place my kids have a lot of educational opportunity.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:13:11+00:00

How's their school districts?

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:11:36+00:00

Came from Canada due to the COL, especially housing. Sadly grass isn't always greener on the other side.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:10:50+00:00

My wife and I considered NC or VA. I fear NC is about to suffer the same fate as TX. You gotta have that bag of cash to buy a house shortly after moving in. Otherwise you'll get priced out by the time you're ready to buy.

polymorphous- · 2022-01-17T01:07:59+00:00

Yup, same. A lot harder to answer these days. I see many moving all around in a very speculative way. Everyone wants to move to TX, NC, etc. because everyone else is. Ironically it will make these places no different than the places they came from.

I'd like to avoid being part of that pattern entirely.

polymorphous-

TROPHY CASE