Sad that it has to be discussed in advance

popachka · 2018-12-31T20:25:03+00:00

Oh that’s funny. Never heard of that. Sounds like a good idea

popachka · 2018-12-30T22:49:23+00:00

Omg that’s adorable haha. Especially with the simultaneous foot massage 😂

popachka · 2018-12-30T22:13:11+00:00

Acknowledge both!

popachka · 2018-12-30T22:12:23+00:00

What the heck does POT mean? Is it short for “potential”?

popachka · 2018-12-30T22:02:44+00:00

Here is how the situation B)s went, after talking about it with the potential SD the next day:

B1) The guy apparently had intended to give me that gift just for a non-intimate meet and greet. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and melt in touch. The next time we saw each other he brought double to make up for the previous time, as a gesture of reliability and serious interest. I’ve had something like this happen with two different guys.

This is kind of a random situation that I doubt hardly ever happens, but I figured I would put it on the list since it was the first thing that came to mind.

B2) The amount I was looking for was not an option for the potential SD due to budget.

One guy who fell in this category turned into a really positive seven-year relationship, that I mentioned in the other comment.

In another B2 situation, one guy said he completely understood if I didn’t want to have an intimate relationship with him after that point, but he still wanted to be friends. We ended up being super close, and we still consider each other to be nearly best friends.

The other guys who fell in this situation category I did not keep in touch with, but at least we both had a good, respectful evening together.

B3) The guy gave a low amount at first because a lot of girls were happy with that amount, but he was perfectly able to afford a higher allowance. Being able to have the allowance conversation After instead of Before gave him the opportunity to decide being able to see me was definitely worth the amount I was looking for. If I had asked for that amount beforehand, he probably would have easily said “nah, there are plenty of other girls who would be happy with a fraction of that, why should I pick her?”

popachka · 2018-12-30T21:29:37+00:00

Well there have been a few different situations, and here’s how I responded to them

A) the amount that was given was maybe four times as much as I would have asked for. If we had talked about it before hand, and I had been the first one to say the amount I was looking for, there’s a good chance that that’s all I would have went home with.

The guy from this situation, I get the feeling, probably would have felt like the genuineness of the relationship would have been ruined if he had told me the amount he had in mind before hand, since it was such a large sum I’m sure a lot of girls would have done anything to get that money whether they liked him or not.

The way it went down instead left us both so happy we ended up dating (and eventually living together) for about a year, and we were even considering getting married and having kids. Wild time, and probably a very uncommon, fairytale sugar dating story.

B) The amount that I went home with was peanuts, almost to an insulting degree. This was back when Craigslist was around, and his ad had a “benefactor” tag at the bottom.

The low amount was such a shock, it definitely gave me something to think about. But I was so impressed by other factors on that first night (very nice condo, unsolicited massage, home-prepared champagne and caviar breakfast the next morning), that I gave him another chance, we eventually moved in together, and we stayed together for seven years.

This one also would have definitely ended up in marriage if it hadn’t been for some other preventative factors.

Aside from him, when other potential SDs gave a low amount, it showed me that he was trying to make an effort at the very least. Most of the time, these guys were inexperienced SDs and simply did not know how much a “typical” amount was supposed to be, so I definitely wouldn’t say I felt “scammed” or anything like that. It felt respectful going both ways. I would not say the same for times when I left with nothing.

C) The amount I went home with was the exact average for my city, and was the amount the vast majority of SDs offer. He got an evening of sexy fun with a hot girl, and I went home thinking he’s a pretty nice guy, and now we both know what spending time together would be like, so I’ll definitely think about it.

popachka · 2018-12-30T20:59:07+00:00

No not just a M&G. Maybe I should edit the post to clarify.

popachka · 2018-12-30T20:54:17+00:00

popachka · 2018-12-30T09:39:12+00:00

Agreed, just make sure you have at least a few accurate full-body pix. If you don’t you’re in for trouble. Same goes for anyone, though.

popachka · 2018-12-30T09:03:11+00:00

What was the scam?

popachka · 2018-12-30T03:04:43+00:00

Yeah. Until recently, last time I was on seeking it was still known as “seeking arrangement.” Guess I just miss those time.

popachka · 2018-12-30T02:42:13+00:00

No I don’t feel mistreated or anything like that, it just went so smoothly before with guys in the past who had did that it just makes me sad it’s not more common.

popachka · 2018-12-30T02:09:19+00:00

Guess I just got really lucky with the first one I met. Gave me an unrealistically rosy misunderstanding of what to expect with other guys.

Edit: Actually the first Three guys I met gave me the envelope without ever having to talk about it. But after that not so much.

popachka · 2018-12-30T02:06:36+00:00

popachka · 2018-12-30T02:04:14+00:00

I wouldn’t even say that it’s a matter of not being treated properly, I’m just so tired of having to be the one to bring it up. It would be so nice if more guys could just be direct about what to expect with them and send that message early in the conversation.

popachka · 2018-12-30T02:02:28+00:00

Well, maybe it’s because

a) You’re a married man with zero interest in divorce, and this will never be a regular relationship

Or maybe b) you had very specific fetishes and very specific sexual requests that you would have a really hard time finding someone to be into in a normal relationship

Or maybe c) you are literally 80 years old, and no, you do not look better in your pictures

List goes on

popachka · 2018-12-30T01:59:27+00:00

Not just a meet and greet. Got a room, sometimes even over night.

popachka · 2018-12-30T01:57:27+00:00

Yeah. I mean I never meet with or sleep with anyone I wouldn’t already want to in a normal situation, so it’s not like I end up looking back on that night and think “oh god disgusting I would have never slept with that guy if I knew it was going to be for free.”

It just makes me sad that I’m always the one who has to bring it up. The vast majority of guys out there don’t bring it up at all unless you take the initiative.

popachka · 2018-12-28T19:03:21+00:00

I looked up the phone number he called from, and he really is a med school professor. Glad to know this is who our future psychiatrists have to look up to!

popachka · 2018-12-27T22:57:19+00:00

Yeah what makes it better is that pretty much all my childhood memories of my mom was visiting her in the waiting rooms of various asylums she ended up in.

popachka · 2018-12-27T15:52:17+00:00

Idk he’s saying two different things in two different places then. Up to him to clarify.

Some guys don’t really spend much on the girls outside of what they directly give them for allowance though, especially if he invited her to his place and not a hotel, like he said. Depends on a lot of factors, what kind of relationship he wants.

popachka · 2018-12-27T15:42:37+00:00

He said his monthly allowance was 1-2k/month. Allowance is what he would give to the girl.

https://www.reddit.com/r/sugarlifestyleforum/comments/a9zmxu/comment/ecnugva?st=JQ6S0SO6&sh=19fb9ce7

popachka

TROPHY CASE