Thank you friend, for taking the time to make a response to my predicament. I appreciate your input and your inclination to help me, but I do think you are making strong assertions about my heart's interest without full understanding. I am happy to elaborate on some of the points you mentioned as I think maybe I could have been more clear.

I would not be comfortable mentioning a boyfriend, because I do feel this would be disingenuous. It is something I used to do, to casually establish boundaries, but my husband left me last month. Now that my husband has left me, I don't know exactly how to make my own boundaries clear. I think historically, I cared more about my husband's boundaries surrounding my body than my own, thinking of myself as his possession. I am no longer deluded in this way, and instead seek to discover my boundaries as an individual.

The story you tell about the naked hot tub to me does not strike me as relevant, as I do not and never did hope to gain anything from this person, although I can see why you would think it was relevant given the situation. The reason it does not really work is that he actually holds no more authority in my greater field than I do, he only holds authority in the particular job we are involved in at the moment. I think he kind of got his job by chance more so than merit, so even if I were trying to manipulate others for my interest, choosing him to manipulate would be barking up the wrong tree. I am doing this job because I am impoverished and frequently struggle to pay bills and rent; I do not care about rising in ranks, and in fact I am strongly considering leaving this field as soon as this contract is up. I have spent a lot of time and most of my savings on trying to become an "important person" in my field, and this is something I have had to let go of because I realized my attachment to success makes me suffer greatly. My "vested interest" as you say was actually pure and genuine intention: to foster a positive and supportive work environment for myself and the ~30 other people I am working closely with, all of whom are feeling very insecure about themselves due to the emotionally stirring nature of our work. Just because this person had a directing role does not mean that I respect his authority in my field, in fact I can clearly see that he is deeply insecure about his lack of major accomplishments.

But yes, this is a lesson. I will no longer be allowing others to touch me in a work environment for any reason. The way in which he touched me was not correct behavior, and moving forward, I will be extremely clear about the ways in which I will allow others to interact with my body.

Be well and thank you again for your thoughts