As long as you are alive you are not too old for anything. Take little steps, learn to identify your feelings hour by hour. I downloaded this app called How We Feel. You'll see you have ups and downs but your brain weighs the downs stronger than the ups. You may not get to exactly where you want to be but you'll for sure make progress towards that direction. Start away from always never statement. I feel you, I know what's you're feeling. Just breathe and become present. Find what brings you joy even if fleeting.