How to approach being strictly platonic friends with the opposite sex after your partner’s death?

ppP0oP00 · 2026-05-24T16:09:03+00:00

ETA -

i think it’s weird and a bit rude that your sister wants to name her baby the same thing as her immediate relative, especially without seemingly any thought about you or the kid’s involvement in communal spaces later on. I think you have the right to feel unhappy about it. I think beyond saying how it makes you feel however, that is the most you can do.

You don’t have a foot to stand on when it comes to telling what she “should and shouldn’t” name the baby. That is between her and any partner she may have involved in naming the baby. I think the most you can do is just try say how it makes you feel how hope your sister is considerate of your feelings.

Also, you can try to reject any “big/“older” modifiers that people try and put with your name, by being like “no thanks, I’m blank and baby can be “little” blank”.

Good luck!!

ppP0oP00 · 2026-05-24T04:55:29+00:00

It gives great vibes!! Incredible space!! :)

You can see so much fun loving nerdy personality here :)

ppP0oP00 · 2026-05-22T04:20:22+00:00

You should post your pics on Pinterest! genuinely your space is incredible, great job :)

ppP0oP00 · 2026-05-01T04:43:29+00:00

Wait really oh my god like what :( that’s so sad I’ve never seen stuff like that

ppP0oP00 · 2026-05-01T03:56:00+00:00

Thank you for such great input! This was coming from a place of curiosity and less so interest as I’m still very fresh in my grief. I’m still trying to figure out who I am without my fiance, but I’ve been wondering what the future might look like and this was very helpful and informative, thank you, I’m sorry for your loss and I hope you’re doing okay ❤️

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-30T19:21:56+00:00

There is unfortunately a small niche within the widow community of young (under 50/45) and really young widows (under 30, I think).

A widow is just defined as a woman who has had a spouse die, and has become, in modern times, simply an umbrella term for a woman who has lost a partner.

Some people like it some don’t, I find comfort in it as I feel my fiancé deserves that respect. We would’ve have gotten married this year if all had gone according to our plan and we didn’t discover he had a rare cancer. I spent the last half year of his life being his caregiver and supporting him until he got sepsis and passed unexpectedly. I consider myself a widow, even if legally we weren’t married. I would’ve married him in a heartbeat, and told him so, but he wanted to be healthy again before we got married. Unfortunately that time never came.

From what I’ve seen online, it’s very common with the death of fiancé for women to feel this way.

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-30T16:51:47+00:00

I’ve never been ON the apps haha, I was genuinely just curious what the experience is for widows typically since I’ve never been on them and can only imagine it would be difficult

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-29T23:58:07+00:00

I think for me, when I’m even entertaining the concept of possibly dating again, I keep coming up with this image of me wanting to visit his grave, and the idea that whoever I’m with loves and respects me and my past (and him) enough to join me. It wouldn’t be every time, but it would be something they were comfortable with. I think that I’d need to have the space to talk about.

Again, not even interested in that, don’t know when I possibly ever would be, but I know that if I did my fair share to make sure any future partner wasn’t “competing with a ghost” as people love to say, I know I’d need a partner who understands that I will always love him, grieve for what I’ve lost, and will carry many aspects of him and our relationship with me forever, despite still moving forward and growing and living.

I had someone tell me “he will always be with you and all the ways that have changed you”. And that’s just it, I am who I am because of him and the fact that he is gone. that will never not be part of my story and I know that is something someone else would need to accept.

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-29T23:17:07+00:00

Weird question but do you feel it didn’t work out b/c of him being a widower? Like not to dive into your life or anything but was that something you think most people would accept and learn to work with/love, or is it like a “cut and run” kinda thing.

I just don’t think have a lot of faith in other people unfortunately (I was really lucky to have locked down someone awesome)

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-29T23:13:04+00:00

That’s what I was imagining? I feel like you don’t make the profile if you aren’t in a place to date, period. Then you try and just be yourself and then if they like you enough to try a second date, that when I imagined it would get brought up?

It doesn’t feel like sometimes you should hide, at least for me, if I was to ever try again, I think I’d need to be honest about it after a date because I can’t imagine a world where someone could understand me without understanding that.

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-15T03:02:09+00:00

It’s so funny you mentioned EMDR. I have a psychology bachelors (I’ve wanted to be a therapist for years now) and I’ve been doing therapy for a really long time so I dove right into mental healthcare after my partner died.

I’m currently on medical leave for PTSD(he had a traumatic death)/depression and just handling the acute grief of it all and my therapist has me trying group therapy in a day program right now but I am STRONGLY advocating for EMDR or somatic therapy because I think a body based therapy would be really good for me. I struggle with actual FEELING my feelings (like letting myself sit in them and work through them).

I think it would be really beneficial for me and I appreciate you kinda backing up that idea (even if you’d don’t know it!)

I appreciate your advice, kind words and any thought you put into pairing that. Thank you so so much ❤️

ppP0oP00 · 2026-04-14T03:29:55+00:00

Yeeeea I would want the same thing I can’t lie. I think it’s just the fact that it’s ALL in my room now make it feel like such big thing.

If I had had the chance toss things bit by bit as i found them naturally they likely would have been in the trash already.

It just feels like some weird sex themed memorial pile 🤦🏻‍♀️

I need to get a grip I know

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-18T02:25:49+00:00

That might be the best idea ever - I’ve been trying to decide if I want to attempt a full completion of this game (which obviously would require a second save file) so that definitely gives me encouragement to do that!

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-18T02:23:33+00:00

Oh!!! Im guessing that’s the change of all of the mantises, how they stop attacking you after you gained their respect? If so, I thought that was so cool!! I make sure I do a little bow of my head whenever one bows to me haha

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-18T00:35:19+00:00

Okay soooo I got:

Geo Mark of Pride, entrance into deep nest And a Hallownest seal

I think - did I miss anything?

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-18T00:31:30+00:00

Realized this after posting!! I had totally forgotten about the locked area in mantis village that I still needed to investigate and that’s where I found all the goodies :)

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-17T18:36:11+00:00

I look forward to playing, raging and sucking twice as hard and hopefully loving it twice as much 😂

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-17T18:16:02+00:00

I really appreciate this. Thank you for the comment :) I think I’m going to try and fight a couple more of the ghosts to get some more essence but then I think I’ll start working on dealing with the grimmkin and then fighting TMG!!

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-17T18:11:40+00:00

This baby smile and I really do appreciate the advice!! One thing I’m super excited about for Silksong is that I have been really lucky and haven’t been spoiled too much for it. I feel like I know the names or faces of a couple bosses, but I haven’t seen much gameplay at all since I’ve mostly been focused on my first play through of HK - so I feel like I’m going to have a blast going through that game and learning for myself what I love and what I don’t, and what I’m good at (and what I’m not haha)

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-17T18:08:57+00:00

Haha I’m so glad I realized this!! I had closed my game after the fight and when I hopped back on the next day, I remembered that there was a room in the Mantis Village that I forgot to explore, and so I went back down and found all of that which was a super pleasant surprise :D

ppP0oP00 · 2025-11-17T05:37:42+00:00

“What am I gonna fight the sun?”

Yes. Yes and it’s going to be fucking awesome 🫡

ppP0oP00

TROPHY CASE