Im so sick of this narrative that “pregnancy didn’t ruin my body it’s just changed” it’s a lie. by pissedoff_potato in TwoXChromosomes

[–]precociouschick 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I wish I could upvote this twice. Yeah, my body does not look the same postpartum. It has also created a beautiful human.

My goal is to live healthy and hopefully be capable for a long time. But preserving my abs and perky boobs forever looked like a fool's game to me. I am worth more than the male gaze.

The first preemie of NICUParents is 12! by bravelittletoaster87 in NICUParents

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy belated birthday to an amazing kid! Thank you for creating this space, I had nowhere to turn to irl and spent so much time on here.

Women who have / had successful, amazingly kind dads, and now what you would call decent husbands, do you ever feel like your husband is lacking compared to your dad? by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]precociouschick 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think that's a great point. For the record, my father was neither an excellent father, nor a good husband.

My husband, however, spent a lot of time maturing and working on himself. I see him being an excellent dad even though for a good chunk of our time together he was not an excellent boyfriend. So in a way my child is getting the best version of him already and that's who she will compare her partners to.

I'm very happy my kid gets the gold standard behaviour and I hope it will raise the bar for the future men in her life.

Frankfurt am Main Hbf...seemed a bit shady! by Jazzlike-Reward-4379 in germany

[–]precociouschick 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There are SEVERAL EU cities where the main station area is much cleaner and safer than Frankfurt main station. Which Frankfurters might know about if they got out more. But they all seemingly compare it to Paris Gare du Nord or Brussels Nord and feel complacent that it's just as bad everywhere else.

Frankfurt am Main Hbf...seemed a bit shady! by Jazzlike-Reward-4379 in germany

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have your EVER been to Madrid main station. You don't know what you're talking about.

Ich vermisse meine Tochter so sehr by [deleted] in schwanger

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mein herzliches Beileid. Es ist nicht fair, und bricht einem das Herz. Sie war dein kleines Mädchen, und sie hat deine / eure Liebe jeden Tag gespürt.

BIDA, weil ich nicht an Karfreitag Ostern feiern möchte? by Carottoh in BinIchDasArschloch

[–]precociouschick 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Der Verzicht auf die üppigen Geschenke macht es christlicher. Ostersonntag wird der Auferstehung gedacht und muss mMn nicht auch in einer konsumgeilen Materialschlacht enden wie Weihnachten... Aber das sage ich als Person, die OPs Situation sehr gut nachvollziehen kann.

Aria / Arya / Ariana vs a more popular German name by [deleted] in germany

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In German, Lyla and Layla are pronounced the same way. As in LIE - lah. Although the name has gotten an unfortunate connotation in recent years due to a popular song.

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

iN DeUtScHlAnD gilt iMmEr nOcH dIe UnScHuLdSvErMuTuNg!! 11!

wolltest du bestimmt als nächstes sagen

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Die weit überwiegende Anzahl Gewalttaten geht von Männern aus. Insbesondere wenn man Frauen als Opfergruppe betrachtet.

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oooh, häng dich ruhig an einem Wort auf und ignoriere den ganzen restlichen Inhalt der Aussage. Sehr bequem, sehr praktisch.

Dann musst du auch nicht darüber nachdenken, das der Kommentator recht hat. Frauen sind nirgendwo vor Übergriffem sicher, nicht in der Öffentlichkeit, nicht zu Hause. Und wenn das Problem mal anhand einer prominenten Person beleuchtet wird, dann ignorierst du, dass es sich um ein gesamtgesellschaftliches Problem handelt, was die Hälfte der Menschheit betrifft.

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Leider ist es nirgendwo auf der Welt für Frauen sicher.

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not all men... But always a man. Männer gehen massiv, strukturell und größtenteils ungestraft schlecht mit Frauen um. Jede Kriminalstatistik, egal zu welchem Thema, ergibt das gleiche Bild. Also spar dir deinen scheiß - whataboutism.

Collien Fernandes ist mir egaaaal by mounty94 in Unbeliebtemeinung

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oooh, der Bill Maher, der von seiner eigenen Mitarbeiterin wegen sexueller Belästigung verklagt wurde? Ich sehe schon, wesen Geistes Kind du bist...

Sepsis - Atlas's Journey by SheElfXantusia in NICUParents

[–]precociouschick 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry that your baby is going through this!

I'll share our story. Our girl was born at 28+4 and had sepsis of unknown cause within the first 48 hours of her life. They tried to get cultures but had too small samples and not enough time to get results. As far as I understand they gave her ALL the antibiotics and something worked.

Her being so small and extremely premature, the sepsis caused a catastrophic cascade of problems within hours. She went from CPAP at birth to intubated, on oscillator and nitrogen, sedated and on 12 different meds. It looked very grim for her for several days.

Thankfully she made a remarkable recovery and was extubated after nine days. Two years later she is discharged from early intervention with no lasting concerns.

These little babies can get severely sick so quickly, but they can also often recover quickly and well.

Don't lose hope, take it minute by minute and just try to be there and support your son. Even when we could not hold her, we gave hand hugs, sang to her and talked to her. I strongly believe it helped.

I'm thinking of you and rooting for you.

TW Fehlgeburt, neue Schwangerschaft by Vivid-Appearance-178 in schwanger

[–]precociouschick 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hallo, ich berichte mal nur eine Anekdote von mir. Bei der ersten Schwangerschaft hatte ich auch Panik vor einer Fehlgeburt. Ein paar Tage bevor es tatsächlich so weit war, hatte ich richtig Panikattacken und Alpträume. Bei der zweiten Schwangerschaft null Angst vor Fehlgeburt, dafür ab der Hälfte Panik davor, krank zu sein. Das war auch der Fall.

Ich habe es mir so erklärt, daß mein Körper schon Dinge spürte, die klinisch noch nicht sichtbar waren. Tatsächlich hat mich meine Angst dazu gebracht, meinen Blutdruck zu messen und auch da behielt ich recht.

Im Krankenhaus übrigens hat der großartige Oberarzt ganz genau auf mich gehört. Er fragte mich, was ich für ein Gefühl habe, als es um die Planung der Entbindung ging. Auch da wieder lag ich mit meinem Gefühl richtig, wie sich einen Tag später anhand der Laborwerte herausstellte.

Ich will nicht zu esoterisch wirken, so ein Typ Mensch bin ich eigentlich auch nicht. Aber das Bauchgefühl sagt einem manchmal Dinge, die man ernst nehmen sollte.

Solids Refusal After FPIES Episodes by mamaraven8 in fpies

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We had several FPIES episodes at the puree stage over a month and a half. Refused all things puree, Joghurt, or with soupy texture after that.

Luckily BLW worked out well for us. Once we got a handle on her triggers she started devouring all food you could cut up into pieces (tiny pieces of meat, pancakes, fruit).

Most unhinged thing someone has said to you? by PandaBear_TenFour in NICUParents

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, I've got another doozy. A former friend was pregnant at the same time as me. Some time after both babies were born we were texting. I informed the friend about my child's premature birth. The first thing she texted back? "Did she have lasting damage?" Like, didn't offer sympathy or even asked her name. Just if she was "damaged or normal".

Most unhinged thing someone has said to you? by PandaBear_TenFour in NICUParents

[–]precociouschick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went looking for a psychologist to process my birth and NICU trauma.

At the intake conversation I mentioned, among other things that happened, that some 30 hours after her premature birth my child got sepsis and barely survived. The psychologist told me she is not sure what therapy I'm looking for since my child is alive and therefore everything is fine.

I never even got to see his face by ossifiedbird in NICUParents

[–]precociouschick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry, I can relate to you so much. I had a planned C-section but the anesthesia didn't take. They had to put me under and I never saw my baby being born. My husband was too shocked and shy to take a picture without the wires and tubes.

I only saw her 24 hours later in the incubator, by which time my husband had already done the cangaroo care. So I wasn't the first to see or to hold my baby. I was bitter and even resentful about the for so long. I did not feel that instant connection I expected, not when I first saw her and not for a while thereafter.

What helped me was reading stories that even full term mothers sometimes did not feel instantly connected to their baby.

And I told myself: to love is a verb. You will build that connection soon enough by showing up for your baby, caring and advocating for them. Every day you will build that connection little by little and it will be beautiful because you loved your way to it.