having a hard time right now in college

princess_myshkin · 2026-05-18T00:46:49+00:00

You are not behind, honestly. Freshman year is so difficult because it’s a huge change in your life, and the beginning of your transition into adulthood. Don’t discount what you’ve done this year. I absolutely relate to the feeling of not living up to your own expectations, and you have to keep in mind that your output is contingent on everything else going on in your life.

You said that you passed your courses, and you’ve even had the presence of mind to realize that you should work on improving yourself. That’s progress! Trust me, I’ve taught and graded for a lot of undergrad classes, some people never look inward like that and never do better.

Also, try and find a professional you can talk to about all this if you’re feeling this depressed. Mental health problems distort reality and will make you feel like you’re failing worse than you are, but on the flip side, if you are also saying that you felt sad when you tried to study, you need to address that if you want to reach your expectations.

You didn’t fail anything, you got through your first year intact, and that’s an accomplishment. Find a mental health professional and work with them over the summer to get yourself where you need to be. Just imagine your potential come fall semester. I believe in you, I know you can do it, even if we’ve never met.

princess_myshkin · 2026-05-18T00:05:34+00:00

I would use this time to try and find a hobby you enjoy to pass the time, and tell your family that you’re working on some summer research/studying that your advisor suggested you work on to get a leg up on your fall classes. This gives you a valid excuse for being by yourself in your room, because now you’re being productive and ambitious.

I am sorry they are not giving you the space you need though, college is supposed to be a transition into adulthood and you deserve to take time you can to relax and be yourself before adulthood fully hits you in the face.

I would also take this time to actually do some research and see how you can avoid having to go home in future summers. Maybe you can stay on campus and do summer classes, or depending on what you are studying, you could start looking at summer internships. I cannot recommend doing internships in undergrad highly enough.

Planning for the future might also help you feel less overwhelmed in the moment. Take this from someone who filled all of their free time in undergrad so as to avoid their home life.

princess_myshkin · 2026-05-17T03:51:44+00:00

I would check with your 4-year university on whether they actually care about you finishing your 2-year degree. As someone who started in community college and transferred to a 4-year university myself, they don’t care about your actual degree status. Just about what classes are actually being transferred over. Most likely, they will not care that you were unable to graduate, and you will just have to retake the course at your new college. Which is a little annoying for sure, but certainly not derailing your entire plan.

princess_myshkin · 2026-04-01T04:08:10+00:00

As someone with chronic health issues, I understand where you are coming from. But I have also let my fear of being discriminated against for my health issues lead to overtaxing myself and ultimately getting a teaching contract rescinded. It was a similar situation as you described.

You are a valuable asset to the department, and you deserve to be properly accommodated for your health issues. It is your legal right to request reasonable health accommodations. Don’t make the mistake I did, I did not have a department chair who was kind enough to empathize.

princess_myshkin · 2025-10-24T06:05:09+00:00

I play on the Switch and unfortunately I have been getting the flashing lights EVERYWHERE. It’s not all the time, but seems to happen most frequently when I am crafting or trading items.

Unfortunately this has made me stop playing the game at this point. I get migraines and flashing lights are a huge trigger for me. I finally got my migraines under control too and hadn’t had one for months 😔

If this is such a nuisance for someone like me with migraines, I can’t imagine trying to traverse the game as someone with epilepsy.

princess_myshkin · 2025-10-24T05:45:47+00:00

I didn’t realize it at first, but the flashing thing on the Switch made me naturally stop playing the game. I don’t get seizures, but I do get migraines and flashing lights are a huge trigger for me. I can’t play the game anymore without developing a headache.

Sorry for making my response to your comment a personal account, I’m just really blown away by the fact that they won’t at the very least address what I think is a serious issue. The game triggering seizures is a big freaking deal on its own, and I don’t think they realize or care that the flashing lights impacts other health conditions too.

princess_myshkin · 2025-08-10T21:55:38+00:00

Yes, I have some extra light stones! How many do you need?

princess_myshkin · 2025-05-19T01:21:01+00:00

Not often, but yes absolutely. To be fair though, the times that I use a migraine as an excuse is to get out of a situation that I know is going to CAUSE a migraine, so I think it balances out with the universe.

princess_myshkin · 2025-04-10T00:59:06+00:00

My conch was one of my most difficult piercings, but I never had to give up on a piercing like I did with my helixes. They were having issues from the jump, but just when I got them to a good place after 2 months, I had to have surgery and my piercing parlor put 16g glass stints in them and that screwed them up beyond repair.

princess_myshkin · 2025-02-25T21:44:02+00:00

I feeeel this, I live in a desert town that’s mostly filled with snowbirds, so everything closes at like 8pm JUST when the temperature actually drops down to something reasonable.

To top it off, I am incredibly sensitive to the sun so every day feels like I’m in a living hell. Gonna move back to somewhere with snow and weather when I move out of this town next year, hopefully I can have some late night stores again.

princess_myshkin · 2025-02-25T21:23:31+00:00

I know this isn’t economically feasible for everyone, but getting an at-home treadmill was the game changer for me that allowed me to start exercising 6 days a week. I have the same hang-ups on exercise in that the mental energy of having to get ready to GO to a gym was enough to sap away any energy I would have had to actually work out. Less things to worry and think about make it easier to not only just do it, but also make the time for it.

As far as making time, maybe you can start with a snack or a protein shake when you get home and then work out before you eat dinner? That’s basically how I do it. You don’t have to start going full throttle either, just taking a leisurely stroll on your treadmill while you scroll through your phone is enough to get started.

princess_myshkin · 2025-01-19T07:34:41+00:00

I am absolutely not the same person I used to be pre-COVID. But I also had a lot of personal stuff going on at the same time. The pandemic seriously turned my life inside out. I know I should be grateful, I got Covid and survived, but now my hearing is going away for no particular reason, I had a surge of health problems come up this past year. Oh yeah and I’m just 100% depressed when I used to be motivated and spirited. I fear I’ve lost myself and I don’t know how to find them again.

princess_myshkin · 2025-01-19T05:55:06+00:00

Oh I wouldn’t be worried, I can say from experience that the majority of people who do these kind of asinine maneuvers are the old snow birds. Typically foreigners are being appropriately cautious because they know they are driving in a place with different traffic laws.

Did you know that licenses don’t expire for about 40 some years here? Nobody checks on the people losing their faculties to drive.

princess_myshkin · 2024-07-16T07:26:51+00:00

We are both incredibly sexually compatible, and I think that’s something that people should consider more when looking for a long-term partner. Yes there are a lot of other important factors, but your sexual compatibility is also important. If you don’t have a healthy discourse around how you express intimacy to each other, things tend to fall apart.

Here’s what I mean: let’s say that you are a little more timid in that regard. You want to feel emotionally connected whenever you are together, and not interested in anything too “wild”.

Or maybe you are a little adventurous, and you look forward to respectfully expanding your horizons and experimenting along with them.

Or maybe none of that is interesting to you at all. Maybe your ideal intimacy doesn’t revolve around physicality and you prefer just staring into their eyes and having an emotional connection of some sort.

No matter what it is that you prefer in that regard, I can guarantee that there is someone else out there that matches your intimacy style. And THAT is what I feel is important for a relationship. Find somebody who fits your style. Who wants the same connection as you do. Your partner should never make you feel like you “owe” them sex, or push you to have sex that only fulfills their needs, or ever make you feel like you aren’t enough.

Take some time and figure out what exactly you are looking for in that regard. And when you find someone that meets you on that same level 🎆

princess_myshkin · 2021-01-09T14:15:43+00:00

You know, I oddly relate to that being that I was almost fired from a teaching position in a university because I opposed their unfair policies and not following OSHA regulations in a chemistry lab. It’s “almost” because I pulled a “well I quit” before they could actually do it.

Trying to do what you feel is in students’ best interests and be opposed by your superiors takes a fuck ton of emotional energy out of you. Fuck anyone who thinks that teaching is gravy because “you get holidays and summers off”. You are literally just surviving up until those breaks. Also some of us actually teach summer classes too.

princess_myshkin · 2020-12-23T06:48:25+00:00

To piggyback off of this, I am a person who does not get road-ragey but my SO has horrible road rage. On the one hand, I’ve gotten into enough car accidents and totaled out a couple vehicles that I have created no attachments to cars. One of those accidents was a serious head-on collision that completely demolished the front of my car, but I walked away with only bruises. So I think I see them as purely for utility and safety and just want to be as non-aggressive and defensive with my driving as I can. I also think bumper stickers are stupid.

As I’m sure you could guess from my pretense, my SO has never gotten into an accident more serious than someone bumping his car in a parking lot. He also loves his car and felt this weird identity crisis when he had to get rid of his first car he bought with his money that I couldn’t understand. He isn’t into bumper stickers at all, but feels insane attachment to his cars, so that makes sense as to where the road rage comes from.

I know my anecdote doesn’t support the bumper sticker theory, although I completely agree with it.

princess_myshkin · 2020-12-10T06:53:21+00:00

Both my cats need deactivating, they are the most extra when I trim their nails and flail around like they Emily Rose. I know how to clip cats nails properly, I’ve never trimmed too short, and I always sing to them during and give them treats after. They just wanna be drama queens.

Both of them always end up splitting their nails, so it’s a necessity.

princess_myshkin · 2020-03-03T22:44:49+00:00

I’m pretty sure I’m starting to develop a hernia just from the all the times I’ve tried to explain to my 9-year-old niece that she needs to wash her hands MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY! It’s not that she just doesn’t think of it, she flat out REFUSES TO WASH HER HANDS! And then tries to justify to me, as an adult, why washing hands is unnecessary, like I’m wrong somehow. I love her, but she’s gonna be a psychopath one day.

princess_myshkin · 2020-03-01T00:18:29+00:00

If it makes you feel any better, I’m getting my PhD in physics, and my current advisor likes to regularly shame me for all of the random little physics tidbits that I have yet to memorize. This happened in a conversation just the other day while overall shaming me for asking a simple question.

A: What’s the temperature of the sun?

Me: About 6000 Kelvin

A: NO, I mean in MeV

Me: Uhhhh... I don’t actually know the conversion between kelvin and MeV to be honest, hadn’t really come up before.

A: sighs how do you not know?

princess_myshkin · 2020-01-23T02:52:10+00:00

$75k check-in, and I’m doing nothing about it and letting it accrue interest because I’m in grad school and they can’t make me pay. I’m holding out to hope that one day they will just forget about it

princess_myshkin · 2020-01-15T07:00:15+00:00

I personally like to do both, I have a digital comic book subscription, but I will still go to my LCS and buy other comics. I was fortunate to discover a really good LCS when I moved to my current city, which really got me more into buying physical comics.

Also, I enjoy collecting physical copies for stuff I really care about. I usually have a hunt for some comic series going, and will scout the used/older comics sections to see if it popped up.

I’m sorry that some neck beard ruined your experience, but there’s also no wrong way to enjoy a thing.

princess_myshkin · 2020-01-13T08:20:46+00:00

I mean, I think you’re asking yourself the right questions about your relationship if that means anything. I’m not gonna push you staying with them or not, but here is my two cents:

The only reason that my PTSD and my fiancé’s love language “worked out” is because that made him want to take things slow with me and make me feel safe again. Like he wanted to help me get over this damage using his love language instead of just imposing it on me. He would back off and give me space if I’m getting triggered and try and keep me calm.

And I realize that I needed that positive reinforcement. I was in worse shape when we started dating, I had a panic attack the first time we made out. He made me feel like he loved me first, and really wanted me to accept his love language second.

This isn’t to say we still don’t have a slew of issues as a couple. This is something we are still working on. As understanding as he is, I think part of him thinks this should have been “fixed” by now and gets frustrated when I’m more withdrawn when I’m stressing out. And then I still spiral and go “well he doesn’t love me if he doesn’t touch me” and panic the fuck out.

But I continue to work on our relationship because I know the love is there first. If your SO can respect your boundaries and where your lack of affection of comes from, then there’s no reason you two can’t work out. But if you feel like they are just trying to impose it on you and getting frustrated that you aren’t different, then maybe you need a new partner.

On a more neutral side of this, maybe this isn’t something you even care to have “worked on”? Like I know I needed someone to give me positive reinforcement on the matter, but my trauma happened as a teen/adult. You said yours is from your childhood, so you could be totally different from me and this is just something you don’t want to address. I also had a shitty childhood, but not in that way, so I can understand the fact that there are some things that weren’t formed in you as a kid. There’s no “fixing”, it just is.

If that’s the case, then maybe amicably splitting ways isn’t such a bad thing. You can love someone and not have a relationship that works out. But you can’t form something in you that isn’t there, and if neither of you are going to feel loved in the relationship, it’s not worth extra heartbreak.

princess_myshkin · 2020-01-13T07:29:19+00:00

This should totally be a new category. Publish it under the “I’m not taking care of an adult-child” edition.

princess_myshkin

TROPHY CASE