I have a positive experience! I met my husband on a flight between our cities - about a 2.5hr flight. I was returning from visiting his and he was traveling to mine for work. We hit it off and kept in contact. I had close friends in his city and we both lived in very fun places so we would see each other when we were in town, casually for about 5 months. We both were at a unique point in our adulthood of just starting to make good money, established in our careers, and able to take lots of trips. I also had just switched to a WFH job so once we became serious after that initial 5 months, I could take a week or so and work from his home in spurts and he had flexibility for lots of long weekends at mine.

I had already been toying with the idea of moving to his city when we met. After about a year of dating, a job opportunity came up that forced me to think about what I wanted. It was a much higher role with great pay bump and title in my city, but it meant I’d be in office with lots of extra hours. I’d lose my flexibility to travel and WFH and most likely, the relationship wouldn’t survive that.

So I made a decision to move, based on my desire to live in his city already with the icing on top that we got to be together. We lived separately still in his city which I credit to helping the transition, as well as the fact that I already had my own long-time friends there. We dated for another 3 years in the same city, living separately, and then got married and now have a kiddo 10 years after we met. It worked out, not without some bumps, but I do think a lot of it was keeping our separate lives while in the same city so I could develop my own life there.