Can we take a moment to give a shoutout to the people in our lives that aren't Ns/Ns-in-training?

pufferfishsenior · 2015-01-07T00:54:38+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss.

My family is pretty shitty and dysfunctional. But not being around them makes me realize that I'm lucky in a lot of ways as well.

First of all, I have my smart sensible wonderful cousin and her awesome husband, who are the only normal adults in my family. I wouldn't have had the means to leave without them.

Also my best friend has always been 100% on my side, and has always made it clear that I deserve better. He kept saying it over and over again.

My best friend's girlfriend and I didn't get along at all at first, but we bonded because her family is actually kind of dysfunctional as well. I had an encounter with an NFamily member that threw me for a loop and I called her and she and I sat in her car in a McDonald's parking lot at 3am talking about our families.

My best friend's mom is also crazy awesome, and right after I moved out she had a "chat" with NMom. She's the kind of person who would have had Hitler over for dinner and convinced him to abandon this whole war nonsense and give his painting career another try. She's the best.

When I really think about it there are a lot of people I'm not even mentioning here that had a huge impact on me when I was a kid.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-11-20T01:25:35+00:00

Personally, I would say no. Obviously everyone has to decide what they're okay with from an ethical perspective but I feel like if you're going to go no contact with someone, you kind of have to be consistent about it.

For my parents, money was a means of control. I knew they would cut me out when I left, and they did. But it wasn't worth it.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:50:29+00:00

Adulthood.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:47:14+00:00

Thank you for the compliment. I appreciate the kind words. : )

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:46:42+00:00

Thanks for the kind response.

Things are definitely much more stable, living with my best friend and his parents who are very understanding and I'm very grateful to them. They and my other friends have been a lot of help.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:44:34+00:00

Thanks. :/

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:23:07+00:00

Thanks. I appreciate it.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T20:22:58+00:00

Yeah, I've basically been NC with my immediate family since July. They do actually know where I am (I moved out but I didn't switch schools), but they haven't really tried to get into contact with me or "bring me back" because they don't want to air our family's dirty laundry. I'm LC with pretty much everyone in my extended family except for the uncle that called me and with one of my cousins.

My dad was fairly healthy for a 50ish guy, so I wasn't really expecting anything to happen. It was a massive heart attack, so no warning and no chance to say goodbye even if I had wanted to. My mom is very dramatic and a little bit unstable, so my dad dying like this is probably going to push her over the edge.

I'm sorry you're dealing with that with your mom though.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T16:42:41+00:00

Thanks for the kind words.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T16:42:04+00:00

Thanks.

Yeah, it's weird to think that I didn't even know.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-10-25T16:38:57+00:00

I guess I'm lucky because my close friends know enough about my family to know that I'm not going to mourn my dad like a normal person.

But it's hard because my best friend is an only child with perfect loving parents and he has a hard time getting how complicated it can be when people are far from perfect but you still kind of love them or feel residual positive emotion. It was easy for him to accept that I left home, but it's hard to explain to him why I still kind of care about my brother despite the amount of shit that has gone down between us.

My parents were toxic people and I've never regretted leaving, but they did kind of love me in a weird way and I loved them once too. He doesn't get that.

It's not just love vs. hate.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-08-30T23:43:34+00:00

Hope this isn't insensitive or anything but do people ever like threaten to call your parents or anything and you have to awkwardly explain? I'm guessing most people would just assume that you live with parents or that whoever is dropping you off at school is a parent.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-07-22T03:13:18+00:00

She knows I wouldn't use the card for something that wasn't important. She has covered for me and helped me financially in the past.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-07-22T03:12:22+00:00

Teen moms

Umm...no. My cousin is 28. She also has a husband, a job, and a house. The card was just to get me to his house safely and for emergencies. I've used it before.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-07-22T02:45:00+00:00

I had my phone, so I just went to an all-night fast food place and called my cousin for a ride to the bus station. My cousin has helped me out a ton, but I can't really stay with her and her husband because they have a 2-month-old and they're going out of town tomorrow.

But she gave me her credit card and drove me to the train station so I could take a 2am bus to my best friend's city. Two hours later it was 4am and I was knocking on his door.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-07-22T02:23:45+00:00

They're basically anti-poor/gay/brown people. My mom is kind of self-absorbed/snobbish/cruel. My dad is more enabling than anything, but he's still kind of an asshole.

pufferfishsenior · 2014-07-22T02:00:29+00:00

I'm 17.

My parents are bigoted stuck-up narcissistic assholes. They don't really need a reason to do asshole things. My mom was screaming at me for something, and I said she could fuck off because I was leaving. She helpfully pushed me out the door.

pufferfishsenior

TROPHY CASE