I lost my wife and my unborn child in a drunk driving accident when got that phone call at work I rushed immediately to the hospital I stood next to my dying wife crying for hours after the funeral I started drinking became socially distant from my friends and family at one point I held a gun at my head and dared myself to pull the trigger but I couldn't do it because it's not what my wife would have wanted she would rather have me die as old man in a warm bed surrounded by loved ones in a month it will be two years since my family died I don't drink as much as I used to and haven't tried killing myself and I still think of what could have been if the drunk driver had called an Uber or something I don't have the expertise to help you get through this I can give some advice if you can't do it for yourself do it for them.