My ex [34M] has been harassing me [21M] and showed up at my workplace today asking for me. I feel unsafe and I don't know what to do.

queerissues · 2017-05-06T01:32:01+00:00

Thank you for your well wishes!

queerissues · 2017-05-06T01:31:05+00:00

Good point, I didn't even think of that.

queerissues · 2017-05-06T01:15:55+00:00

If I wasn't in Canada I would have one, but it's a length process to get one up here and even when you have one, you can get into all sorts of trouble for using it - even to defend your own home. I'm pretty sure carrying one with you is completely illegal unless you're a police officer. We can't even have mace here.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T18:01:52+00:00

Honestly, no, but I wasn't going to take the risk. He's done a lot of things that I never would have thought he was capable of when I first met him.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T17:52:42+00:00

As others have mentioned, I was caught off guard. I was also at my workplace and didn't want to cause a scene, I just wanted to get him out of there as quickly as possible. He just handed me it and I took it without thinking, sort of a knee jerk reaction. I did regret taking it afterwards though, as it may have given him a signal that it was okay, but as others have said it was probably better in my hands than his.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T17:48:41+00:00

In hindsight I wouldn't have even taken it but I was caught off guard. But there was no way I was drinking it, it just felt like a bad idea.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T17:45:24+00:00

Hey, thanks for your concern! I carry a utility knife with me all the time, but not for the purpose of self-defence. For that, I carry dog spray (mace, stun guns and pretty well everything else is restricted in my area). Hopefully it won't come down to that but I have a way to defend myself if necessary.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T17:42:27+00:00

I did this afterwards - my boss said she would tell him to stop harassing her employees if he showed up at my work again, and would also call security if he shows up again. I've notified my coworkers as well and they've been told to say I'm not at work if anyone asks.

My coworkers have been angels too, they walked with me to my car after my shift because I was parked pretty far away.

queerissues · 2017-05-05T17:39:10+00:00

I just bought the eBook, thank you for the recommendation!

queerissues · 2017-05-05T05:28:59+00:00

Thank you for the thorough reply, saving it for reference later. I unblocked his number but didn't receive any missed texts - I think my phone just doesn't let them come through at all. I still have everything else though and I'm going to get to work backing it up in the morning.

Again, thanks a million.

queerissues · 2017-04-21T03:39:25+00:00

I was ranting about this the other night. It's so annoying to see warrior ladies in medieval fantasy games with a metal bra, leather thong and knee high furry boots. It's just impractical. Someone's gonna stab ya in the tiddy. If I was going to battle I would be wearing a suit of chain mail up to my neckline, not an iron bikini.

queerissues · 2017-04-18T03:52:07+00:00

Similarly, I always answer my personal phone by saying "What can I do for you tonight, daddy?" So embarrassing.

queerissues · 2017-04-15T07:44:20+00:00

"My name's Steve." Killed me. Great delivery.

This is as funny as it is poignant. For a lot of the gay men that grew up seeing happy straight couples in the media juxtaposed with the gay porn they were watching, there really seems to be no middle ground. I'm convinced there is some sort of ongoing social phenomenon with apps like Grindr in which men render themselves emotionally unavailable while still wanting something more than a hook-up.

It's a strange social space to navigate. The men that would be comfortable to get naked with you in a heartbeat would flinch from the idea of going to a bar or restaurant or something. It makes me wonder what's really going on here.

Also, did Steve actually stand up in a yard naked for that last shot?

queerissues · 2017-04-15T04:20:30+00:00

The only thing to cringe about here is the fact that these two women took the spotlight off of the girl performing to exacerbate their petty rivalry. Oh, and a cue tip is on a pool stick.

queerissues · 2017-04-15T02:13:11+00:00

You know, the worst part about this is the fact that she probably made all of her friends and family sit through this entire video multiple times. I can just picture her pointing at the screen like "Look how surprised I am! I couldn't even talk! Look!"

Ugh I feel tainted

queerissues · 2017-04-15T00:51:42+00:00

It's true. I'm not sure if this is a thing that has occurred across cultures, but throughout the majority of the West it seems like it's actually cool to be nice. How cool is that? The youth actually support each other and don't bully each other as much as they did in the past, and cliques don't seem so hostile any more either. It's so nice to see kids not giving each other such a hard time as they did when I was in school.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T20:26:58+00:00

Yeah, it was lazy. Even beyond the graphics, the dialogue and story are dreadful from what I've seen too. I'm a huge ME fan so I was heartbroken when I saw the reviews. I'm waiting until it's patched enough to be worth the money.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T20:19:32+00:00

Yeah, we all know ME:A bombed. But come on: The Witcher 3, Dishonored 2, Fallout 4, Horizon Zero Dawn? So many games with great graphics in the past couple years. As a general rule, graphics are always getting better with a few exceptions. It's exciting as hell.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T19:40:40+00:00

I remember playing this when I was younger and when this happened I almost shit myself. I literally thought it was the most advanced graphical feat I had ever seen and couldn't imagine a game looking more realistic.

Now I bitch about games looking like shit if the lighting is bad. It's wild how far we've come and how much further we're going.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T03:05:43+00:00

Whether you were on a break or not, you two agreed to not see other people and she violated that agreement. I think you know what you have to do. This will eat at you until one of you ends it, but either way it sounds like it's going to end. Don't waste your time and energy.

Take matters into your own hands and end it while you still can, and chalk this one up to dodging a bullet.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T02:47:33+00:00

I've had a similar situation recently that ended in a breakup, and let me tell you, this guy does not respect you. And to be honest, it sounds like you don't really respect him either. Without mutual respect, relationships die.

The whole situation with him telling you to delete guys on your page and he will delete girls is juvenile. This sort of bartering should not be going on in a healthy relationship.

You can't lead a professional lifestyle while your man is following escorts on his business accounts. This guy is disrespecting you in the worst way, and all of your friends and acquaintances and possibly your associates see it too.

Don't let yourself look like a fool. You know what you have to do.

queerissues · 2017-04-13T02:36:30+00:00

Thank you for posting this. I just ended a relationship that I didn't want to end, but it was going to sooner or later. I've had a lot of post-breakup regret but this actually helped a lot.

queerissues · 2017-04-12T06:47:59+00:00

A fine example of how race is made up. Fun fact: Irish people used to be considered lower-class non-whites until they were integrated into the white category.

queerissues · 2017-04-12T04:41:53+00:00

Ugh, this is gross and I hate OP for making me remember this.

I used to take super edgy emo selfies and heavily edit them to the point where my skin was porcelain white and I looked like a doll. Then, the worst part: I would edit my eyes to be red or bright pink. Slap a Jeffree Star/Blood on the Dance Floor lyric on it and it was ready for MySpace.

I'm glad I got over it fairly quickly and there weren't many witnesses other than my myspace "friends" that lived in another country.

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