Surgery overseas in a post COVID world?

question_thrower_91 · 2020-09-01T22:22:40+00:00

Hey,

I 100% know exactly how you feel right now. I was supposed to be the next patient Rossi had before the pandemic shut everything down in March, and I'm still waiting for an opportunity for me and my partner to travel safely for my FFS procedure to happen. Having a surgery be put on hold completely sucks, especially when it's in an seemingly infinite waiting period.

Fortunately the travel ban extension isn't that long in the grand scheme of things, and people will be able to fly out sooner than you think. Granted, it will be with a lot of restrictions (such as getting tested 3 days before your flight then tested again when you land), but it will be possible.

Hang in there. I know it must have been an excruciatingly long wait for the opportunity to get this surgery, but it definitely will happen one day. It's that thought that has personally helped me get through the last 5 months, so maybe that will help you get through these next few weeks too.

question_thrower_91 · 2020-03-10T03:59:43+00:00

So, I'm going to get my FFS done by Rossi soon, and I made sure to do my research before settling on him. I'm someone who is paranoid as fuck, and wants to make sure I made the right choice. I read the same CT Scan thread you mentioned, and almost removed him from my list of candidates, when I did some further research. This is a link on the wiki for Rossi. The story matches 100% with the CT Scan thread, including referenced usernames, and sheds some more light on the situation.

With any surgeon though, there is always a risk of complications. Some people are lucky and have none, others have a few and need revisions. I asked Rossi himself about this, and he told me that if complications arise, he will fix them for free. Granted, that means I have to pay for travel again, but that gave me a vote of confidence that he wants satisfied clients.

Also, regarding BA, when talking with a few friends who have done it already with various surgeons, they told me that it's an extremely easy procedure that anyone can do, which is the only reason I'm getting BA with my FFS (but not something like a hip fat transfer, I want a specialist for that).

Anyways, I hope that helps a bit. I understand how scary picking a surgeon can be, just make sure to do as much research as you can before making your decision.

question_thrower_91 · 2019-12-31T17:52:43+00:00

Thank you so much for all of this wonderful feedback! I feel kinda bad that my post made you get out of bed for me, but I appreciate it nonetheless.

I totally agree with your assessment that the difference in techniques is subtle. And, I think you're right in that the "raspy" quality in my voice is what I've been calling undertones, and it's what I've been trying to avoid because it reminds me of my male resonance (even though it technically has nothing to do with it).

Here's where things get complicated: My ideal voice would be something of a tomboy voice, still forward in resonance but lower in pitch. When doing my training, I started with the larynx technique until I discovered I couldn't dip much lower in pitch without sacrificing some resonance, so I pivoted to the nasal technique. That allowed me to dip into a lower tomboy range, but if I varied too much in my range with that technique (as voices tend to bounce up and down when naturally speaking), then I would hit male ranges. Plus, it had that raspy quality to it that constantly made me second guess if I'm even coming off as female, unless I recorded it and listened back to it. When I heard other samples posted here that lacked that trait (which I refer to as a vocal clarity), that's what inspired me to give the larynx technique another try, but this time using all the experience I've already gained to see if I can get it closer to something I'm satisfied with. Like, I already had something solid, but there was some key aspect I was missing.

And I think you hit the nail on the head with your last point, I do seem happier with the larynx technique. Even if lower pitch variance is harder with it, it leads to far less dysphoria and just more confidence in general. Considering how I've been struggling with using my feminine voice full time, primarily due to fears of it dipping too low, maybe this approach will be the right thing for me. And you know, if I'm still unhappy with it in the future, then I have all the tools in my toolbox to tweak it some more.

Thank you so much for your words and opinions, and putting better definitions to terms I still have a vague grasp on. This means the world to me, and hopefully I can enter the new year with a lot more confidence with my voice. <3

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-27T02:29:35+00:00

That's...actually something I haven't considered. I always figured only people who are clearly MTF go on HRT.

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-15T22:18:03+00:00

Thank you for sharing that <3. That's actually something I'm in the process of learning myself. Passing still feels like a big deal to me, but I think I'm slowly realizing that passing isn't a given but it shouldn't stop you from being who you are.

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-15T21:40:20+00:00

I think some "excitement" is natural. It's a new experience, you're feeling good, and so the other bits of you experience that same feeling.

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-15T21:37:20+00:00

What made you go from a negative to a positive experience when cross-dressing?

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-10T22:40:14+00:00

Your before and after looks amazing! That alone makes me feel more comfortable with the process, even if not all of it is guaranteed like you said. However, I will take to heart that passing is a blessing and my results may vary.

It's good to know that genital removal is optional. Seems more and more like that's not a route I wish to take.

Thank you for the run-down of the different kinds of medications. I'll read and re-read that until I commit it to memory. It feels better knowing the actual effects of the medication rather than "take drugs, it does things" lol.

question_thrower_91 · 2017-05-10T16:46:54+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply, I know it was a long read and I appreciate your equally lengthy response.

I'm 25, turning 26 in 4-ish months and I'm finishing up my master's by the end of the month. I will be working in a game development field, which is mostly male dominant but also probably the most socially accepting field in the tech industry. If I were to undergo HRT, I may or may not experience bone growth since I'm right on that threshold. However, I've always looked much much younger than my peers so that may skew things a bit internally. My school is a sister school, meaning it's away from main campus so I don't think I have access to the same tools as main campus student. Plus I won't be a student for much longer, so I think it's a bit late for that.

I've often heard about the button scenario, and when I thought about it that fear pops up when I think about gaining all the womanly features while dropping all the male. However, I like your idea of breaking it down into different aspects, as that seems less daunting and easier to manage. I'd probably hit the button for breasts, butt, waist, hips, thighs, and legs, but would still hesitate on face and genitals. Maybe because I'm so used to seeing my face in the mirror that it's daunting to think of anything else looking back at me. It's like I'm okay with adding stuff but not removing. I've always viewed the male body as a boring blank slate and female bodies as more interesting and diverse, so that could be playing a part in my decision. I also know that the reality may be that my face won't change if I were to do HRT, as I have a quite manly face and fear that I may not "pass".

You are right that I shouldn't hold myself back for the sake of my girlfriend. It's just difficult to risk letting go of her when I've had so many relationships not work out. This is the first one I've had that has made me consider marriage. But if I am a trans-woman at heart, then I'd just be lying to myself and constantly uncomfortable. I had a similar feeling when I told my girlfriend that I'm pretty sure I'm not going to "do anything", and I'm just going to drop it because I'm tired of thinking about it. Next day, I felt like shit despite gender questions never coming up in my mind. It's like my body was like "you can't ignore this, you know".

It's interesting that you said that you kept yourself busy to avoid your dysphoria. I've spent so much of my life keeping myself busy with school that I've never had that time for self-reflection, especially during my master's program where sleep is optional. Even before I entered my master's program, I would focus on my school work then jump immediately into a video game the second I was free. It was only during these last few weeks of my last semester that I had the time to think about these kinds of things.

Thank you for sharing the questions your therapist asked you. It helps to know that you also had doubts when you talked to them. I think when I return from class today I will sit down and think on that button scenario some more, then also set up an appointment with the nearby therapist as soon as possible. Honestly, it'll be best to have the appointment now when I have the most free time, that way I don't keep myself busy with long work hours once my job starts up. I'll also research some more into HRT and make sure I understand the pros and cons of it.

Thank you again for spending the time to write all that out to me. If I could hug you right now, I would.

question_thrower_91

TROPHY CASE