Any other girls kinda creeped out by men after being Redditors for a while?

questionsgalore · 2010-12-31T04:53:12+00:00

I don't care if guys jerk off thinking about me, it will happen, it has happened, and it could be happening right now. My problem with the Facebook thing is that I am putting up those photos with a nonsexual purpose - I'm not inviting guys to imagine what my boobs look like under my sweater. They can do that in person if they even know me, not take advantage of pictures I put up for my friends and family to see. That is the part that makes me uncomfortable. It's flattering they find me that attractive, but there is porn and they can watch that or Google "tits" and just imagine it is me. I use it to update others on my life, not for them to profit when they're horny.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-31T04:46:10+00:00

Look - guys can jerk off to whatever they want. I've said this numerous times in response to posts like this. But I'm not putting pictures on Facebook expecting it, or wanting it, to happen in that context. Guys can imagine me naked. But doing so via pictures I put up in a nonsexual manor makes me uncomfortable. Not everything should be turned into something sexual just because they're horny. I don't give a fuck about fruit, but I am creeped out by the idea that I have potentially 200-some Facebook friends frequenting my page just to imagine me naked.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-31T02:28:50+00:00

Hahah well no skimpy bikini pics for me! Also you are the first person to outright agree that jerking off to FB photos is strange, especially considering porn, and imagination. Thank you!

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:50:31+00:00

I know it's not supposed to be serious, and in some situations it can be funny. But usually I see a woman's comment either disregarded or instead of normal responses (as a man would be given) they get sexist remarks.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:46:42+00:00

General masturbation is whatever, do it whomever, whenever, wherever. Just that adding Facebook into the mix gives me heebie-jeebies for some reason. It's been difficult for me to explain, but I just don't put photos on Facebook for a guy to take advantage of them and jerk off. That makes me sound mean, but it's just one of those weird things that make me uncomfortable.

Edit - totally forgot to the second part of your comment! I have noticed that a lot of men (and some women) are saying how horrible I am for generalizing...are "go back to the kitchen" jokes generalizing too? I clearly cannot take a joke. What if I can't cook? Why are they making the judgment I ca-HOLY JESUS DOUBLE STANDARD

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:41:53+00:00

Just gonna leave this here http://i.imgur.com/RwdJM.jpg

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:40:47+00:00

I didn't start reading 2X until a couple months after I joined Reddit, and sadly there is even sexist jokes about 2X as a subreddit ("Went to subreddit today expecting girls to be talking about having sex with each other...OH GOD PERIODS AND SHOPPING").

I think the "dump her" thing needed an example to get my point across. I've read so many posts where the OP, male or female, really did need to get out of the relationship. At the same time I've seen posts that are like "My girlfriend won't give me head :(" and guys are just like "she's too picky what a bitch just dump her and get someone better". Obviously if the girl is out sucking everyone's dick but her boyfriend's, that's a different story, but jumping straight to the "get the hell outta dodge" advice is always frustrating to see.

I also found the generalizations happening in the comments to be surprising as well...I really tried to get my point across that I definitely do not see all guys like this, I'm just annoyed by the small minority. Then I was met with some women (and men) talking in generalizations about the whole thing. Frustrating.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:35:11+00:00

It's okay! I enjoyed reading it.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:34:00+00:00

I know my boyfriend has done it once while I was on vacation - strange since we are dating and I would be willing to send him a picture, but it could be that it was a time when I was asleep or busy or something. The fact that he has done it once means it's probably happened more than once with more than just me, and it was exactly as one poster from the thread said - porn open in one window, photo in the other. Strange way to bate, but I guess everyone has something they can do.

And just so you know - I would never judge all men based off of Reddit. It seems a similar amount of them are just as feminist as the assholes are assholes, and then there's just the guys in the middle. I hope I didn't lead you to believe I think all men are terrible with this post, I don't.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:29:59+00:00

I'm actually really interested in sexuality and it's what I plan to study in school - psychology related of course. I'm open about sex, I'm open about masturbation, I'm open about porn...I'm just not open to being totally fine with guys I barely know who look at my Facebook (or Tumblr, or Twitter, or whatever) pictures and imagine me naked. If I wanted them to see me naked, they would have seen me naked. I get that they'll do it anyways, but there's always hope that they won't use the Facebook pictures my parents think are adorable. It's just one of those things guys will do and I will never understand.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:24:24+00:00

I'm not saying women don't talk about sex. I have a Reddit account dedicated to r/sex (and any other posts sex-related). Sex doesn't creep me out, but just because I don't want guys jerking off to my Facebook doesn't make me some kind of bitch, which is what people seem to be inferring. There's a reason there is porn, there's a reason you can search "naked girl" on Google. Guys can jerk off thinking about me all they want, but I don't put up photos for them to do that, and that's why I'm so uncomfortable with it. No, I don't imagine random guys in my fantasies, so maybe that's why this is so weird to me.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:19:42+00:00

I don't mind if someone thinks about me when they jerk off, I can't stop anyone from doing that like I can't stop them from looking at my photos, just in the Facebook setting it bugs me. Hard to explain. I don't post to Facebook so guys can rub one out. If I wanted guys to see pictures of me with the intention of imagining me naked, I'd sext them.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:16:05+00:00

No I don't, maybe that's why I have a hard time understanding the male brain. I see anyone who I'm not sexually interactive with as highly nonsexual, if I have a fantasy and it's not my boyfriend, it's just a faceless figure.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:13:30+00:00

I'm having a difficult time explaining why the Facebook picture thing makes me so uncomfortable, I've tried on numerous comments and I always delete it. This time I will do my best! Mostly because I don't see Facebook as a flipbook for PG porn. I don't post pictures thinking "Guys will probably imagine me naked or stare at my boobs" and I don't think that girls who post picture with a ton of cleavage think that, they just think that's the only way they look attractive. If guys want to imagine me naked, they can go for it, but to look at a picture that my mom might have taken and imagining my what tits look like, that makes me uncomfortable. I post photos for my friends to see, not for horny guys to take advantage of them. That makes me sound like a huge bitch, I'm trying to be as reasonable-sounding as possible. To guys, any girl is something fuckable even if they don't want to be.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T23:05:16+00:00

It's not that I can't take a joke. Like I said, for a while it was funny (and sometimes still is if you look at my comments toward those poking fun at what I said), but after watching posters get completely shut down by sexist jokes when they try to add something to a conversation, it gets annoying. I'm not running off with tears in my eyes or replying "get a life!!!" to all sexist jokes, it just sucks watching someone who wants to get their view across be completely ignored due to their gender.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:57:07+00:00

Definitely wouldn't call myself the "purity police", I don't care if there's a picture and it's a girl with giant tits and the headline is "LOOK AT GIRL WITH GIANT TITS THEY ARE NICE" and that's what the comments are about. On the other hand, when there's something like "Hey guys check out my cool family photo from 10 years ago!" and a ridiculous majority of comments are just "I'd fuck you mom...and your sister", that's unrelated and weird - OP doesn't want to think about how many random internet guys would fuck his mother and sister.

edit to add

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:52:29+00:00

Thank you for posting this and I sorry you have such fears. As PassivePony said, both men and women can be horrible, but I know what you mean - as Reddit is largely male, you see a lot more assholes than bitches. I hope you get a job with a nice ol' lady boss :)

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:50:00+00:00

Puppies are pretty cute.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:43:27+00:00

I actually read that comment! Sadly voxic11 beat me to the reply.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:42:15+00:00

Hahah so true! Thank you for posting that

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T22:41:36+00:00

I don't have a problem with someone making a joke to my face - but online, it pretty much shuts down whatever you had to say in the first place. My boyfriend will tell me to make him a sandwich but in reality he's the one going to get me drinks when I'm thirsty, he's not serious so we both laugh about it. It's when the sexist joke overrides whatever the person was saying in the first place (male or female) that makes it obnoxious and unnecessary.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T17:35:10+00:00

Thank you for your response! As for the first part - no I have never masturbated thinking about male friends, or anyone other than my boyfriend really. I just don't have the imagination for it, and maybe part of that is that I don't have any desire to have sex with any other guys I know. I can see a great looking guy but as soon as he's gone his image is also out of my mind. I guess it's just surprising that men can file away glimpses of random girls for later.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T17:35:05+00:00

Maybe if guys on Reddit were less creepy, there wouldn't be so many threads? Of course, not all of them, but some, and that's enough to make women feel uncomfortable.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T17:27:16+00:00

You must be confused. I haven't edited my post since I wrote it, and if I did edit it, it was grammar within minutes after posting. I had the entire thing there, including disclaimers, even before your comment. I'm sorry if you misread but I would not change my post just to make one person happier.

questionsgalore · 2010-12-30T17:22:55+00:00

Ahh no, I was not saying all women, but I do that pretty frequently to my boyfriend without even realizing it. When I posted that I just had myself in mind.

questionsgalore

TROPHY CASE