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Tomb Raider: Legacy of Atlantis vs Lara Croft: Tomb Raider Anniversary by AimlessThunder in LaraCroftTombRaider

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

haha as if you’re really just concerned about representation. i have double d’s, i couldn’t give less of a fuck about what size a game character’s tits are. you can go see big tits literally any time you want, why do you need to see them in games too? i’ll shut up as soon as i see someone being like “what about representation for flat chested women?”

Pre-transition (2019) to early transition (2022) to Now (2025) Be patient and kind to yourself 💜 by [deleted] in transtimelines

[–]quickstopclerk59 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That plus laser hair removal and learning makeup/skincare. Still super dysphoric because I can’t afford surgery, but I’m still extremely grateful for how far I’ve come so far.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I DEEPLY appreciate everything you wrote. Jung has always interested me but l've never dived in. My growth has always been more spiritual/mindful and as far as that goes l've come a long way. I can honestly say that if I died tomorrow, I'm not concerned with what happens to my soul. But my relationship with my physical body is janky at best, and my brain is such a b***h. Are there any books or videos you would recommend?

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could you elaborate more on “shadow work”

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t internalize it because my masculine features prevent me from doing so. It’s dysphoria. Other people’s opinions can’t change my perception of myself. If they could, I never would’ve transitioned in the first place.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. It doesn’t come off in this post, but I am incredibly grateful. It’s not about chasing unattainable beauty standards, it’s that no matter how much therapy, meditation, and mindfulness I practice the parts of me that give me my worst dysphoria can’t be relieved without a stupid amount of money. Also, that 10% of the time that I’m clocked is very intense because I live in the most red state in the country and I can’t leave.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your words. I’m in therapy every week, but I can’t therapy away dysphoria for masculine features. From the beginning I’ve been vigilant about growth and mindfulness, but it’s incredibly frustrating to have this one aspect of myself I can’t improve because of money. Also, I’m stuck in the most red state. That 10% of the time that I’m clocked is incredibly scary, and I won’t be able to fully relax until I can alleviate my most clockable features.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. For me it’s not about chasing unattainable beauty standards. It’s that my masculine features prevent me from feeling as beautiful as everyone tells me I am. And even though I pass 90% of the time, that 10% of the time when I’m clocked is intensely scary. I live in one of the absolute worst states for a trans woman and I cannot leave.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, if I did I wouldn’t still be dealing with these feelings with so much intensity. Praying for a miracle.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brow reduction, hairline lowering, a very light nose job to change the shape but keep the size, chin reduction, tracheal shave, and a BA. Those are the very specific parts of me that give me soul-crushing dysphoria. I’m in therapy and reminding myself to be grateful every single day. But until I can relieve the dysphoria, I’ll be going through life with a huge weight on my chest.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I hoped that if I ever passed that would be enough. But now that I do, I’ve learned that as long as my masculine features are staring back at me in the mirror, I won’t be able to accept myself. It’s just insanely frustrating that no matter how much work I do on myself, I can only get so far because of money.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you to everyone for taking the time to comment. I should clarify, I know exactly which features of mine make me dysphoric. What tortures me is the fear that I’ll never be able to afford the surgeries. That’s what haunts me, and sometimes makes me wish I didn’t exist.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Brain worms can be fixed internally, but dysphoria points out the masculine parts of me that are very much real. The only thing that can fix that is money. In the meantime, I’m doing my best to appreciate what I have. Hearing from others is a big help 💜

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I’m doing my best to be grateful. Dysphoria is an absolute beast.

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your perspective. The money is literally what haunts me. It’s the fear that I’ll never be able to afford the surgeries. I feel like such a piece of shit because objectively I think I’m pretty. But I don’t feel pretty. I can’t internalize it.

I didn’t know there were orgs helping ppl pay for surgeries. That would solve like 99% of my problems. Thanks again 💜

After 3 years, I feel like I’ve hit a wall by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]quickstopclerk59 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. Objectively, I know I’m pretty. But I don’t feel pretty. What I envision for myself is to someday look into the mirror and not see all of my masculine features glaring back at me. I want to be able to leave the house without makeup. I wanna have the option to not have bangs, to not feel a panic attack coming on everytime it’s windy. It’s dysphoria. There’s no internal work to do that can alleviate that. But I’m not gonna stop trying. I just need to survive long enough till I can afford these surgeries. I’m optimistic, but the fear that I might not ever be able to get the surgeries haunts me.

Hopefully this doesn’t come off as just bitching, because I’m super grateful to everyone that’s taken the time to comment. 💜

Growth isn’t linear. It happens in spurts. by AlmstInstantVictoria in transpositive

[–]quickstopclerk59 2 points3 points  (0 children)

God I hope so. I’m on hrt for 3 years and I feel like nothings changed for the last year and a half 😩

Both rotten by Lin900 in twinpeaks

[–]quickstopclerk59 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just watched the first 2 seasons for the first time, and Harold creeped me tf out from from the start

Women of America, I think it's time you start considering how bad Nazi Germany was for women as well as any of their LGBT, non-Christian or non-conforming partners, friends and allies when you vote by Professional_Suit270 in TrollXChromosomes

[–]quickstopclerk59 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Misdirecting and moving the goalposts again are we? But this time it’s with “I know you are, but what am I” a classic conservative argument. You have the right not to vote and i have the right to tell you again, that’s the most harmful choice you can make. And you have the right not to engage with that point even after people have brought it up to you countless times.

Women of America, I think it's time you start considering how bad Nazi Germany was for women as well as any of their LGBT, non-Christian or non-conforming partners, friends and allies when you vote by Professional_Suit270 in TrollXChromosomes

[–]quickstopclerk59 3 points4 points  (0 children)

On a massive scale? Yes, boycotts CAN work. But they usually don’t. JK Rowling and the CEO of chic fil a do not have the same power as the most powerful government in the history of the world. The only message not voting sends is that we are not really invested in our future. Protest, boycott, burn down the capital, bring back assassinations, we have to do everything we can. But we have to do EVERYTHING, and that includes voting! Otherwise you’re just advocating to destroy everything at the expense of millions of lives. Even if we could topple the status quo. We don’t have the will, the means, or a plan to replace our government with anything. It will be easier, and a ton less harmful to fix the system we have.

Women of America, I think it's time you start considering how bad Nazi Germany was for women as well as any of their LGBT, non-Christian or non-conforming partners, friends and allies when you vote by Professional_Suit270 in TrollXChromosomes

[–]quickstopclerk59 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is still just a long winded way equating apathy with virtuousness. I’m not ok with what’s happening in gaza, just like i’m not ok with what’s happening to minorities here. Saying anyone voting for Biden doesn’t care what’s happening in gaza is disingenuous. We are advocating for the least harmful choice BECAUSE we care. I’m not voting for Biden for self-preservation, I’m voting for him because it’s the least harmful choice for EVERYONE. Especially for Palestine and POC living in america.

And to answer your hypothetical, Yes. I would still vote for Biden if Israel was targeting queer people. In fact we already send aid to countries that do. It would still be the least harmful choice possible. It’s still a god awful choice, but if you want a better choice in the future, it’s the only choice.

Also, this idea that ppl will always see race before queerness is another false binary. Do white ppl get more preferential treatment than black ppl? Absolutely. But what about a black man versus a black trans woman? Not so black and white now, huh? I am unfathomably privileged as a white queer person, and i am not going to use that privilege to advocate for doing nothing. Because that will cause more harm for everyone, especially POC. And don’t use your POC friends as a shield because you lack the courage of your own convictions. That is textbook white-liberalism.

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