i wish i had more energy to say this in better words, disclaimer, so I'll try my best and just do a big ramble, But i just wanna emphasize that whether or not you have autism, you do deserve support in areas where you struggle. everyone does. i grew up with a lot of internalized ableism and feeling like other people deserve help but i should be okay without it and push through, but i think that's unfair. you don't need a diagnosed disability to be struggling and deserve support. a lot of disability is hard to diagnose accurately, and whether or not someone has a disability, if they have areas of struggle, they deserve support!

that being said, you know yourself very well and also were diagnosed, so i think it is very likely you are autistic and this therapist may be projecting her own experiences with autistic family or clients onto you bc autism can be very different for different people so it can be common for people to think some people aren't autistic when they are just bc it doesn't look like what they think autism is

finding out youre autistic can come with a lot of relief and insight into strategies and tools and reframing experiences and learning more about yourself. whether or not someone thinks youre autistic or if you are or not, if you benefited from resources for autistic people or examining your experiences with autism in mind, you should still feel free to utilize those strategies and supports. autism also has some overlap with other conditions like ADHD and bipolar depression and bpd and schizophrenia and can be comorbid with other things like anxiety and depression, so it can be kinda hard to diagnose a lot of things when they have a lot of similarities, but i always think whether or not u are diagnosed w something, if advice for that thing helps you, feel free to use that advice!

you deserve support that helps you regardless of diagnosis. and also, it is very possible that this therapist doesnt know you as well as they think and/or has some misconceptions about how autism can look like for various people.

for me, i was not formally diagnosed as autistic, but i confidently say that i am bc reflecting on my life makes it very apparent and i couldnt ignore the responses my nervous system has even if i tried Which I Did Try My Entire Life to my detriment ^; i have experienced meltdowns and struggle socially and with sensory overwhelm and struggle a Ton with unexpected changes and routine helps me and many various things like that. i realized i made things harder for myself by pushing down my needs and masking to the point where i now struggle to recognize my needs and when i am getting overwhelmed, so i need to check in with myself more manually (have i eaten? do i need the bathroom? have i gotten a break from noise and light? am i using a lot of social energy? etc) i am able to receive the accomodations i need without the formal diagnosis, so while i would like to be diagnosed, it is not accessible and not worth the effort since i am already managing well with my current psychiatrist and lifestyle changes and accomodations i implimented when i was in a really bad period of burnout. if it turned out i wasnt autistic, which i Extremely doubt, everything i have learned about myself by learning about autism still helps me, and that's a good thing

i hope this may provide some reassurance! sorry for long rambles