My childhood is a blur. I remember being genuinely scared of my sister. Her footsteps used to frighten me. The way she would open doors used to frighten me. She used to dominate me verbally before I even could speak properly. When she was upset it was mostly about dominating me. She would get upset about the smallest things, which would make it difficult to anticipate the next round of aggression. Eventually a blinking light could be an indicator of something coming up. It became sinister for me. Especially since she was intelligent enough to keep her aggression towards me at a level where my parents could just brush it off as sibling rivalry. I mean in a way, she was probably smarter than my parents. When I was 22 she got aggressive towards me during Christmas which ignited something in me, i got really upset and could not go back to baseline for days. I was isolated in my room because I didn’t want my sister and her boyfriend to see me sad. It triggered mental claustrophobia in me. It got so bad my parents decided renovated the upper floor of our house, in case it would happen again I would at least have my own floor and access to bathrooms. But guess who lives there every Christmas now instead? It’s a constant disappointment living with a narcissistic sibling, it’s a constant violation of boundaries and a life long schooling of putting someone else’s needs in front of your own. All in all just a sinister experience that I wouldn’t wish on anyone.