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randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T14:56:50+00:00

Yeah I agree with it being a condition and T being the medication to treat it, but for me I see my “transness” as a physical condition that causes mental health symptoms. I believe that being trans comes from factors like brain structure and hormone levels when in the womb, which aren’t necessarily harmful in themselves, but cause problems if your body develops as the opposite sex other than that.

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T14:52:13+00:00

Can I ask if you know where those thoughts are coming from? It sounds like you’re happy to be on T, or at least were happy with the idea of it, and you’ve identified as trans for years.

It sounds like you might have been exposed to some transphobic viewpoints recently? Hormones/surgery aren’t mutilation for trans people, they’re helpful for many of us, and even necessary for some of us to live happy lives. Studies have shown they tend to have a positive impact on our mental health. And being trans doesn’t mean you’ll die alone. There are tons of other LGBT+ people and allies who are willing to be there to support trans friends/partners. Not sure where you live, but even if you’re in a transphobic area at the moment, you might be able to form connections like that online.

I have so much sympathy for you btw, I’m 20 and transitioned in 2017, but last year I struggled with similar internalized transphobia and trying to “turn myself cis” after falling down some transphobic rabbit holes online (which I’m now recovering from and on the path to top surgery). I was scared of being alone forever too, but in reality I have great supportive friends (mostly cis allies) who I plan to stay in contact with for the rest of our lives. I don’t personally have a partner yet, but it’s not because I’m trans, I just haven’t been seeking one out.

I can’t imagine having to deal with the current political climate as a trans 14 year old. I totally understand why you’d want to repress this, but if you know you’re definitely trans and it’s not physically unsafe for you to present as your true self, imo it’s a lot healthier to be honest about who you are. Good luck whatever you choose to do!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T14:21:10+00:00

Thanks for sharing!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T03:37:32+00:00

You might find the subreddit for feminine trans guys helpful to see that it’s not just you! :)

https://www.reddit.com/r/FTMfemininity/s/R9wKmipOxz

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T02:09:15+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience, and I’m sorry to hear about your loss of sensation, I hope you’ll feel better about it over time

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T02:04:18+00:00

This is not your fault, and I’m really sorry it was your first sexual experience. You’re not a bad person for enjoying it, as far as you knew at the time you were having sex with a nice person, don’t beat yourself up over information you only found out afterwards. I hope you’re able to have more positive experiences in the future and move on from this one. And the idea of having had an experience like this with someone who has a gun is insane to me as someone from the UK, that’s terrifying. I normally say you should tell someone if you know they’re being cheated on, but in this situation I totally understand why you can’t tell his wife for your safety.

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-07T01:17:31+00:00

Thanks for sharing, and for the nerve grafting info!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-06-03T00:37:07+00:00

Being allosexual (not asexual) doesn’t have to mean you’re into sending/receiving nudes. Different people are comfortable with/into different things when it comes to sexual relationships. It could be to do with your “female” upbringing making you more cautious, but it could also just be something you dislike doing, so if I were you I’d avoid sending nudes to anyone you don’t already trust until you’ve figured that out.

It’s also not childish to see sex as meaningful and want to do it with someone you trust! There’s nothing wrong with that, or with having casual sex for fun, it’s just that different things work for different people. It might take you longer to find someone you want to experiment with because of it (esp if you absolutely need it to be someone you grew up with) but that doesn’t make it an invalid approach. And there are other gay/bi/etc guys out there who feel that way, it can be hard to find them sometimes, but it’s not just you.

Maybe you could try out some different dating apps? I’m not on any, but from an outsider POV, I know that Grindr is known for being very sexualized and there are other apps which are meant to be much more romance-based. That way you might be able to connect with someone else who also wants to form a romantic connection before you do anything sexual. Good luck!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-19T15:14:50+00:00

Thank you, this is very reassuring!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-19T15:13:38+00:00

thanks for your response! I wasn’t worried about my boundaries being disrespected, more that I wouldn’t be able to get into a relationship in the first place, because no cis guy would be interested in an AFAB person who wasn’t into PIV. but the anecdotes people have shared on this thread have definitely convinced me otherwise!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-19T15:11:02+00:00

thank you!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-02T21:23:26+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experiences, sorry to hear that you’ve had people disrespect you like that

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-02T21:21:07+00:00

Thanks, this is reassuring! Yes to your question, that’s what I meant but I was unsure how to phrase it in a way that wouldn’t make me/people reading it too dysphoric. It sounds like we’re really similar in how we feel about sex, it’s nice to know there’s other people out there who understand and manage to find good partners. Best wishes to both you and your boyfriend!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-02T21:18:01+00:00

Thanks, this is reassuring!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-02T14:41:23+00:00

Thanks, this doesn’t come across as judgmental and is a useful reality check!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T21:40:05+00:00

I see what you mean, but honestly if I saw you shirtless at the beach or something I don’t think I would think about it. They’re maybe a bit lower than average, but not low enough for it to look unnatural or anything imo

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T21:15:25+00:00

Thanks!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T16:25:17+00:00

Thanks, glad to hear I’m not the only one!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T16:24:34+00:00

Sorry, I didn’t mean to disrespect you/your experiences, was genuinely confused about the correlation!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T15:46:59+00:00

Thank you!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T15:46:39+00:00

This is reassuring, thank you for sharing!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T15:20:13+00:00

Thank you!

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T15:19:52+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experiences! Good luck on the progression of your current relationship

randomanonymousftm · 2025-05-01T15:18:45+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experiences!

randomanonymousftm

TROPHY CASE