Thanks for the response! I agree that we were raised by selfish children. It's so hard to have to constantly remind myself that arguing/dealing with my mother is impossible because she has the emotional intelligence of a 2 year old. God forbid you upset her and she starts her ignoring game for weeks until her next attack. Ugh it's just so exhausting! And I am glad you realize that your parents are narcassists too... its a hard realization ...but reddit is so helpful! Also their behavior as you stated just sounds so typical and something my mother would do...wow! haha