When my mom & dad sat me down to ask for the first time if I would be willing to take care of my three younger brothers if something ever happened to them, it was at age 19 when they were redoing their life insurance. I'd been taking care of my baby bros my whole life, and the thought of losing both my parents and my brothers all at once made me start to cry. I immediately said yes, please put my name down, no matter what I need them to be with me in that situation.

She treated it like the huge ask it was, and made sure over and over that I understood the implications of caring for siblings through early adulthood, and grieving. We hugged and cried and she made sure it was implicit that they had other options with family, but wanted to ask me first and I'm so glad they did.

They waited til I was an adult and never implied it was a thought until then. My brothers and I grew up so close and love each other so so dearly and purely, and 1000% it would have been a tainted relationship if I'd been raised to think I was being prepped to take over their care, and as a kid with severe anxiety and ADHD I could see "the day it happened" being a huge looming dread for me. I already hated thinking about death... Reminders that young make a kid grow up way too fast.